Unanswered [7] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


Technology is huge part or our daily life



Dave2014 1 / -  
Jan 15, 2014   #1
Technology is huge part or our daily life now days; however there are a lot of different types of technology each one has its own benefits and features. On the other hand, technology can be harmful if misused .on this paper I will be writing about one type of technology that I believe it is very significant to me which is Global Positioning System (GPS).

GPS is very significant to me because I strongly believe that it makes our daily life easier than before gps was found .GPS is created by the department of defense in 1973 .in big cities such as New York or Los Angeles it is most likely for anyone to get lost duo to the traffic and similar neighborhoods.in such case GPS can be useful and give us the exact direct without losing and wasting time and gas. Not only that, but also GPS can do more than navigating people.it can show us what is the shortest path to our destination and which paths that has more traffic .

The use of GPS is very easy and comfortable, that's because when we type and address for one time we don't do it again each time we want to go to the same destination. PS also can help us to decide which restaurants to go to for example. Hats because in the new version of GPS it shows us the nearest restaurants with reviews from people that have been in the same place.

The other reason that GPS is very significant to me is that GPS can affect huge companies financially. For example, when a person decides to by a Cell phone he/she will go with the phone that has GPS feature in it which would be motivation for IT companies to have gps in most of their products.

As I great useful device, GPS can be harmful if it is not used in the right way.to avoid misleading, gps has to be up-to-date with locations and directions .as one from my own experience with misleading GPS duo to no keep in update. I drove about 45 miles toward a Mall the has been relocated while still show in my gps it is still in its old place

Pahan 1 / 1824  
Jan 16, 2014   #2
First, it is better if we had some idea about the purpose of writing this essay. Is this for a college admission? or IELTS, TOEFL etc.?

Technology is huge part or our daily life now days; however there are a lot of different types of technology each one has its own benefits and features.

... This sentence has several issues. Let's tackle its grammar first;
Technology is a huge part of our daily life nowadays. However, there are lots of different types of technology and each has its own benefits and features.

Second, I find it not having much meaningful contribution to your essay. Why are you talking about different types of technologies?
You also have not given us the title of this essay. Without knowing your title, it is even harder to comment on your essay :(
dumi 1 / 6793  
Jan 16, 2014   #3
I understand that you are new to this forum. So, I have a few admin requests for you;
First, you should have a meaningful title for your essay and this is a forum rule.(your title has been attended by us) It also helps you earn more feedbacks. Second, you should open your essay in the most appropriate forum. In this case, it should be "Writing Feedback" forum. (I transferred your essay from Undergraduate to Writing Feedback)

Also, it is better if you include the purpose, as Pahan mentions , in the title itself. It helps others to give you more meaningful feedbacks.


Home / Writing Feedback / Technology is huge part or our daily life
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳