Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 5


Ielts test task 2: Air transportation for fruits and vegetables



Letwind 2 / 2  
Feb 1, 2014   #1
本帖最后由 letwind 于 2-2-2014 00:38 编辑

Question:

Air transportation is increasingly being used to export many types of fruits and vegetables where those plants can't be grown or out of season. Some say it is a good idea, but others consider such use of air transport can't be justified. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Answer:

It's a topic subject to debate as to whether air transportation should serve the purpose of exporting fruits and vegetables. Some argue that it is advisable while others are against it.

Those who dismiss such use of air transportation have based their arguments on the following grounds. For one thing, the potential health problems associated with the fruits and vegetables transported by air attract their attention. The quality of fruits and vegetables is largely dependent on the freshness of the plants, and they fear that after the long-distance travel, the fruits and vegetables being exported may have become inferior in quality, which are likely to cause potential health problems to the people of the importing country. For another, it is also their concern that air transportation should not be misused. Fruits and vegetables are not life-supporting essential products and they consider it to be appropriate for those more important goods such as medical equipment to be exported by air.

On the other hand, the supporters of shipping fruits and vegetables by air look at the economic and relationship aspects of the trade. First of all, it contributes to the growth of international trade and benefits both the exporting and importing country. The country which exports the products will be able to make money out of the trade, grow its GDP and eventually return the proceeds to improve the life of its people. In terms of the importing country, it will therefore be able to satisfy the people's requirements for those exotic fruits or vegetables which are either not home grown or out of season. This, to some extent, also helps to improve the living standards of the people and promote the prosperity of the market. Secondly, it also benefits the bilateral relationship between the two countries involved in this international trade. The fruits or vegetables are often regarded as "friendly ambassadors" from the exporting country to the importing country, especially when they are being exported frequently and in large quantities, and have achieved a certain level of popularity in the importing country.

In my view, under the context of globalization, the air transportation should serve diversified purposes, including exporting fruits and vegetables, to further promote the growth the global economy and enhance bilateral relations among countries.

tiaDS 73 / 222  
Feb 1, 2014   #2
"Title"

Air transportation is increasingly being used to export many types of fruits and vegetables where those plants can't be grown or out of season. Some say it is a good idea, but others consider such use of air transport can't be justified. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

your introduction

It's a topic subject to debate as to whether air transportation should serve the purpose of exporting fruits and vegetables. Some argue that it is advisable while others are against it.

I try to make intorduction from paraphrasing title.
Troughout the world, air transport is used to export fruits and vegetables when extrim weather comes and, they cannot be grown well. Some people tend to pros, but others critics claim that air transport cannot be used for delivery crops.
Fardhani Putri 23 / 44  
Feb 2, 2014   #3
hi there..

It's a topic subject to debate as to whether air transportation should serve the purpose of exporting fruits and vegetables. Some argue that it is advisable while others are against it.

actually, your introduction is not really good :(
I agree with tiaDS

Troughout the world, air transport is used to export fruits and vegetables when extrim weather comes and, they cannot be grown well. Some people tend to pros, but others critics claim that air transport cannot be used for delivery crops.

I will give you my introduction
Today's world, many of crops have been distributed to other countries by planes because the crops cannot be grown well in some countries when it is out of season. Some say that is advisable while others against that planes are not appropriate transportation for carrying fruits and vegetables. I will discuss this debatable issue, then state my opinion.
OP Letwind 2 / 2  
Feb 2, 2014   #4
Dear all, thanks a lot for your valuable feedback to the introduction part of my essay. I will take your suggestions into account when writing it in the future. Can you please also comment on the main body of my essay, if possible? Thanks a lot.
Pahan 1 / 1824  
Feb 2, 2014   #5
I think you write extremely well. Excellent grammar, sentences, vocabulary and ideas. It is only that you need to pay attention to the essay structure which would help you earn a real good score for this task while helping you manage time. ( I think you should pay attention to what dumi has suggested above for your introduction.) Below I give the overall essay structure she suggests for this task.

You need to complete this task within the allocated time.


Home / Writing Feedback / Ielts test task 2: Air transportation for fruits and vegetables
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳