Topic is - "Open your own Cold cone creamery franchise and start down the road to financial independence. Are you tired of working long hours at low pay? Join the ranks
Of successful business owners who have opened cold cone creameries. Due to its sunny weather ,California is the number one ice cream state in the nation ,with more icecream parlors per captia than any other state .Work for yourself, set your own hours ,and keep profits ,as the owner of your own successful business."
In the above statement, the speaker exhorts the people reading the statement to buy the Cold Cone Creamery Franchise in California. The speaker avers that Cold Cone Creamer Business will thrive in California because it occupies the number one ranking in nation for number of ice cream parlors per capita, which is in turn because of California's sunny weather. Also, the statement further prompts people to avail themselves of the benefits of a self-owned enterprise as flexible working hours, reporting to one-self only and ownership of profits. However, on a close scrutiny, the sales-pitch statement seems to be based on meager evidence and untenable assumptions. Neither the premises are sound nor is the argument compelling, the exhortation seems be based on a result of impetuous generalization.
To begin with, while it has been mentioned that "Join the rank of successful business owners", no evidence or statistics has been provided regarding the number of people who embarked on this venture and became owners of a flourishing enterprise thereafter. It is very possible that hardly a few, or maybe none succeeded in the business of selling Cold Cone Creamery.
Then again, it would be preposterous to assume that ice-cream business will thrive in California owing to its sunny weather and highest per capita number of ice-cream parlors presently. This is because for all we know, the ice cream business might be at a saturation point in California, and people might be looking to enjoy other delicacies as cold drinks or fruit juices, rather than ice-cream.
Furthermore, the statement also urges people to work for themselves, in their own timings, and to retain the profits. This statement of encouragement is weakened owing to lack of concrete data as how much will be the percentage of profits shared by the vendors to the parent company, and what can be the potential opening and closing hours of an ice-cream stall in California. Also, it is naive to assume that by opening a stall, a person would be working for himself, as it may well happen that the owner of the franchise might have to work according to customer preferences for timings etc., e.g. work at inconvenient timings as late evenings.
To buttress this statement, the speaker would do well to provide concrete data related to the prospect of sales of ice-cream in California, and also how the people who bought the franchise of the Cold Cone Creamery are performing there. It would be also helpful to know the exact terms and conditions as upfront fees, profit-sharing etc. on basis of which a prospective buyer of the franchise may evaluate the business proposition.
In summary, owing to lack of proper and sufficient statistical evidence and due to prevalence of unwarranted assumptions, the statement does not seem convincing at all, and seems untenable at its best. Had the speaker taken into account the above mentioned factors, the sales-pitch would have been rendered incontrovertible, but whatever has been presented here is not convincing and seems to be superficial and insufficient at its best.