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Over time, the people's lifestyle had been changed. The technology can be a main factor for it



SarlindaDS_27 42 / 51  
Oct 31, 2016   #1
Writing Task II ( October 31, 2016)

Some people say that in the modern world it is very difficult for people to have a healthy lifestyle. Others, however, say that it is easy for people to be healthy and fit if they want to be.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


Over time, the people's lifestyle had been changed. Technology can be the factor which affected of the people lifestyle. Nowadays, there are many tools that were invented for make people lives complete and become easier than the past. Although, there are some people feel cannot have a good lifestyle and others feel can enjoy their lives as better as if they want it by using the technology. Actually, I think both of the people issues above depend on people ways to arrange their time and activities all the days.

In fact, today there are many sports equipment and gymnastic tools for people use in the home without an instructor. I think those things are very suitable for people who want to keep their fit but not have much time to take workout activities in the gym center or in outside home. Certainly, the people who work in the office can apply this way to maintenance their healthy after working in their home. So, there are not reasons for ignoring important of exercises because of the busy activity or difficult to practice it alone at home, due to every tool usually complete with CD instruction for learning how to use it.

However, maybe the price of the tools is not affordable for all people. Sometimes, only who have high financial that can buy the gymnastic tools such as a threat-mile device or weight-loss equipment. But this is not the reason for people who have an average income because at present there are many gym places that provide some tools for gym activities or workout exercises with low price for uses it just usually only 5,000 to 10,000 Rupiah per hour. So, every people can freely use the tools that their needs.

To sum up, actually, I think today we have more accesses to the healthy lifestyle as our habitually. All of it just depends on ourselves in how we manage our time and budget which appropriate with our necessary.

(330 words)

lanazaldo 7 / 10  
Oct 31, 2016   #2
hi..
good writing..
I have some suggestions..

... people's lifestyle had been[you mean that you want to make active sentence, don't you?] changed. Technology can be the [major, predominant,main] [put the adjective to modify the phrase] factor which affected[affect] [it should be present tense as it is the general truth]of[go directly to the noun phrase, you don't need "of"] the people lifestyle.

... tools that were invented for[to] make people [people's] lives complete and become[it can be double verb] easier than the past. Although, there are some people feel [that] cannot have ...

I hope it helps..


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