The two friends I can count on - help with grammar!

I've had a lot of friends but these two friends are the only one I can count on and will always be there for me. This first friend is a guy I have known since grade 7; He was a transferred student who recently moved in the island. On his first day of school he came up to me and said "wanna be my friend?" I laughed, hearing someone still says that in this age and I thought it was nice even though it was kind of straightforward. We got to know each other and found out we shared similar interest and opinions. I knew ever since the first time we met that were going to be close. Thereafter, we started hanging out and doing crazy stuffs and there was a time when he came to sleep over at my place where we spent all night playing video games cautiously so we don't get caught by my parents. He's fun to hang out with and will always have your back every time even now. This second friend is a girl I have known for about two years. She is the exact opposite of my first friend. She is more serious and don't talk to very much because she is shy although I would tease her and she would smile and laugh and would start talking to me. She is a good listener, who is there for me whenever I need to share my thoughts and would understand me when others can't seems to understand what's wrong. My first friend and she are both someone who I can just sit and talk to for hours about stuff that really doesn't matter and would not get bored. They're also the people that I can trust and really admire as a person.

...."guy" sounds a bit too slang...however, it depends on your purpose. If this is very informal writing, then it's fine. Otherwise you need to use a more formal word like "boy".


... grade 7 and recently - the reader tends to get confused about the times. The first one gives the impression that you've known him for long and the second one disturbs that feeling.

Im sorry, english is not my first language so its kinda hard for me to correct it. How would you rewrite the whole paragraph so its right? does it make sense? it suppose to be a comparative paragraph between two friends and im not sure if i did it right

neither mine :D


Well, dumi has not said your writing is wrong. :) .... Yes it makes sense and the reader can get the comparison right. A few suggestions from me;


The first friend is a boy whom I have known since grade seven. He is a transfer student who moved into our island. On his very first day at our school, he came to me and asked "wanna be my friend?". This made me laugh because it sounded silly for a boy of that age to ask such a question. However, it also made me feel that he is a straightforward character which I liked. We got along well and I found that we shared many similar interests and views.

I've had a lot of friends but these two friends are the only ones I can count on and will always be there for me. The first of these is a boy who I have known from 7th grade. He is a transfer student who moved into our island. It was the first day of school and he came up to me and asked "wanna be my friend?" I thought it was funny for someone at that age to ask such a question but it was nice that it was straightforward. After hanging out with him, I found that we have similar interests and opinions. I knew that we would become close friends. Once he came over and we played video games. We had to do this secretly just in case my parents found out. He would always had my back covered. My second friend is a girl that I've known for 2 years. She is very different than my first friend. She the type that is serious and doesn't talk too much but when I teased her, she would smile and laugh. If something is disturbing me, I can trust her with my thoughts. She can sit and listen and understand what's wrong. It isn't very hard to just sit and talk with these two because they are people that I truly can admire and trust.

You should add a few more detail about the girl. You said that the boy was in 7th grade when you met him and was a transfer student. The girl has no such details about her. Also you should explain how he had your back covered.