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Writing Task 2 (unit 2 Workbook CECI) Healthy lifestyle for some people in modern world



ZiadRasyid24 10 / 15  
Aug 17, 2016   #1
Write about the following topics:
Some people say that in the modern world it is very difficult for people to have a healthy lifestyle. Others, however, say that it is easy for people to healthy and fit if they want to be.

Discuss both these views and give your opinion


Introduction:
In advanced era some people state that it is hard to be healthy for people worked all day long. In my opinion, I agree that to be healthy is the most problem for worked people. However, some people think that keep healthy is simple and not matter.

Conclusion:
In conclusion, it seems that not enough time is the most problem for some people caused them very difficult to be healthy lifestyle. Although some people have unhealthy lifestyle, others consider to be healthy with spend more time to exercise and eat some organic food.

Wolf Larsen - / 109  
Aug 17, 2016   #2
Hello ZiadRasyid24

You should consider doing a bit more reading in English - this should help you to get a 'feel' of this language. Your text is understandable, but it could use being refined stylistically. I rewrote some of the featured sentences for you to exemplify what I mean.

In advanced era [...] Nowadays, many people believe that it is quite impossible for them to be employed on a full-time basis and to lead a healthy lifestyle at the same time.

In my opinion [...], trying to accomplish such an objective is indeed rather challenging.
However [...], as practice shows, there are quite a few individuals capable of combining full-time employment with being physically active.
it seems [...] that the lack of time does prevent many people from trying to stay in good physical shape.
Although [...] However, there can be hardly any good excuse for individuals to refrain from paying attention to their health. One of the things that they can do, in this respect, is to switch to eating organic food.

I hope this came of help. Regards.


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