University is the better route than school to reach successful career

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to reach successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school both views and give your opinion

a school degree helps

There are some who deem that achieving degrees from university are effective way to find out the superior career path. However, there are few who consider that after completing school graduation, people should prefer jobs for better career. In this essay, I will be discussing both the views to come up with my sentiment.

Tertiary education is preferred by some due to professional requirement. This is recommended in particular area, such as physicians, other among profession. As physician, people need further studies; otherwise they cannot work effectively and efficiently. To boost up careers, they have to accomplish the advanced education. For this reason, that studying at university is widely accepted.

However, others argue that school graduates should work to be experienced as it is required in various professions. Such experiences are distinctly valued in job sectors. Evidently, this helps people in particular areas, such accountancy, management, and other among areas. So, people in areas need to gain practical familiarity with relevant subject. It is clear that joining in job after finishing school can be a positive development for individuals.

From my perspective, when experience is valued than study in particulars professions. In this case, I encourage individuals join to the work. Nonetheless, some profession is demand higher degrees. Then I think, people should pursue study to cope up with jobs. Thus, they can make a smooth career for themselves.

To recapitulate, it is evident that degrees from university or college are inevitable to be proficient in specific areas. While work experiences are also needed in the other areas. In this regard, I think, school graduate should go for work, if experience is demanded in their field; otherwise they should pursue further study for the development of career.

Dear mentors,
please evaluate my essay and give your precious suggestion to improve my writings.
thanks in advance for your time and kindness.

I am trying to improve my writing up to the level that secure my band 7.5

I have found some grammatical issues throughout your essay. For instance, are effective wayS
particular areas: Physicians is not an area, maybe you meant physics?
The first whole paragraph didn't make sense to me.

please check mine: UNEQUAL SOCIETIES: INCOME DISTRIBUTION

fiZa, I do not think that you can score higher than a 6 with this type of essay. The reason that I scored you within that bracket is because the essay has good topic sentences but you do not know how to properly present your discussion so that your thought process is clear and understandable to the reader. You have clear problems with cohesiveness and coherence in all your sentences because you are always missing a clear topic sentence and, there are times when it seems like you are presenting a sentence from the middle, instead from the start of the thought development presentation. These grammatical and sentence structure errors prevented you from gaining a score that could be higher than a 6. You must constantly practice writing complete English sentences in order to address this problem. Fill in the blanks sentence development exercises will help tremendously towards improving your sentence structure and development predicament. Some examples of your unclear sentence presentations are:

1. Your whole opening statement
2. . For this reason, that studying at university is widely accepted.
3. So, people in areas need to gain practical familiarity with relevant subject.

You must focus on learning how to develop simple English sentences first. The problem with your essay always relates to your inability to properly develop sentences and paragraphs that will be understandable to the reader. So you have to focus on grammar exercises and the presentation of your sentences, without using prompt requirements first. You can do this by reading English articles and then just writing what you understand about it. Explain it on paper and have us check it for clarity of presentation. Once you get used to presenting clear explanations, you will be able to properly respond to prompt statements already.