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2000 The water in Bahrain, Kuwait, Qatar, Oman, Saudi Arabia and UAE were mostly used in agriculture


maulida07 6 / 7 1  
Sep 2, 2016   #1
IELTS Writing Task 4 (The Water Use in Gulf Countries in 2000)

The bar chart gives the information about the water use in Gulf countries in 2000. Overall, it can be seen that the water use in Bahrain, Kuwait, Qatar, Oman, Saudi Arabia and UAE were mostly spent on the sector of agriculture.

In the year of 2000, Saudi Arabia and Oman were the top users of water for agriculture field. Both stood at up to four-fifths while Qatar and UAE stood at 62% and 65% respectively. This was followed by Bahrain and Kuwait with the very least amount of water use in agriculture.

On the other hand, domestic use was favored by both Bahrain and Kuwait with the average of 58%. Qatar and UAE were right behind with 32,5% in average, while Oman and Saudi Arabia spent no more than 15% of water for domestic needs. The small use of water was for industrial with no more than one in ten except Kuwait.

akbarmappiare 31 / 469 275  
Sep 3, 2016   #2
Hi Maulida.
These below are my thoughts for your writing


Overall, it can be seen that the water use in Bahrain...
OVERALL, IT IS ESSENTIAL TO NOTE THAT OMAN AND SAUDI ARABIA CONSUMED THE WATER AT ALMOST AS MUCH AS ALMOST THE SAME PERCENTAGE FOR THREE DISTINCT SECTORS. IN ANY CASE, WHILE THE DOMESTIC WAS PRIORITIZED BY BAHRAIN AND KUWAIT FOR SUPPLYING THE WATER, OTHER COUNTRIES WERE LIKELY TO USE THE WATER TO SUPPORT THE AGRICULTURE.

Those above are the alternative sentences to describe overview. Miss, make sure you can write more than 3 sentences in each paragraph. On the other side of a coin, you have to make comparisons amongst figures on condition that you wanna get the high score. It is an essential factor in the writing task 1.

In the year of 2000, Saudi Arabia and Oman [...] very least amount of water use in agriculture.
These can be seen that you describe the data safely. You made description like listing the information. Please, you consider illustrating the data through the comparisons.

One of the most important consideration is to write the writing task 1 approximately 170 words. Be careful because you write near the edge of the minimum number (152 words).

I believe you will master for this if you wanna provide much time for practice more and more.
Keep Spirit
Good Luck.
dinartika19 37 / 67 6  
Sep 4, 2016   #3
Hi Maulida!

... information about the water useusage in the Gulf countries in 2000.

Overall, it can be seen that the water useusage in Bahrain, Kuwait... => the sentence quite bit looks like shopping list, it's better for you to avoid it.

Both of them stood at up to four-fifths 45 percent.

ThisThe numbers was followed by

... was for industrial with no moreless than one in ten except Kuwait. => what do you mean by one in ten?

NB : You should add the data so we can correct it. :)

Good luck!


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