Unanswered [3]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


Whoever controls the media, have the power to control people. IELTS WRITING TASK 2



jocelyn wang 3 / 6  
Jul 16, 2019   #1

Do mass media influence public opinion?



Whoever controls the media also controls opinions and attitudes of the people and there is little can be done to rectify this.
To what extend do you agree or disagree?


My essay:

Under capitalism, most of the main medium is usually controlled by mega-corporations. However, there are some exclusions, especially when a country is in danger of existence, the media is seized by government thoroughly. In my opinion, people are easily affected by those media in terms of their thoughts and minds.

Nowadays, there are numerous medium, presented by different companies, describing their news on their understanding. Although the media should represent as the fourth estate in a country, each media has more or less its political affiliation. Hence, the audiences can choose the channel which they trust, or more accurately they prefer. Personally, I read the online news from the independent publishers, as they seem to be more neutral than the mainstream media to me. Either the main media or the independent ones, they are all sharing their ideas which their target audiences are willing to accept and absorb it.

In some particular cases, such as war, the government would ban the freedom of speech and publish. Back to the '70s in Taiwan, there were only 3 news channels broadcasted over the entire country due to the unstable political situation. The news contents were limited and restricted, moreover, those favored the government. Needless to say, the opinions were solely and monotonous. Taking my parents as an example, those notions, conveyed by the government at that time, are still wired deeply in their brains.

In conclusion, the influence of media is massive that almost no one can stay unaffected from it.

Thanks for reviewing. I'm sitting IELTS exam in near future. It would be nice to have some advice from others. :)

Maria - / 1096  
Jul 16, 2019   #2
@jocelyn wang
Hello there. Welcome to the forum. I hope I can provide you with the assistance you are looking for in the future.

Overall, your writing is put-together. I can only suggest trying to evade being overtly complex at times when it comes to relaying information. Remember that your primary goal is to ensure that you are being understood. If you can, evade using too many technical terms and boil everything down to an understandable commonplace perspective. This will help you focus more on depth rather than anything else.

Other than that, the usage of example is quite effective. You have quite a handy grasp of the language, so a bit of work will be alright.

Best of luck as always. quotes
kimmy2105 2 / 5  
Jul 16, 2019   #3
Hi, it's just my suggestion
I would think that in the third paragraph, you should give reasons why "the government would ban the freedom of speech and publish". Because the phrase " in some particular cases" seems a bit ambiguous, you can explain the rest of the sentence more explicitly.


Home / Writing Feedback / Whoever controls the media, have the power to control people. IELTS WRITING TASK 2
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳