Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


7-year period, 9 different countries - Asian Elephants Population 1997/2004



Clark Kent 20 / 23  
Nov 21, 2015   #1
A breakdown of the number of Asian Elephants population from 1994 to 2007 as a projected years, a 7-year period is revealed in the graph. Overall, India was the nicest place for elephants to grow up among Asian countries, while China showed reverse.

In 1997, the enormous number of population of Asian elephants experienced in India, almost 10,000 elephants lived in India, while Myanmar saw approximately two times lower than of this. Thailand also shown as the third highest of elephants population, even though it was only no more than 4,000. The other countries were not the best place for this species to breed, because they were solely less than 3,000 elephants.

By 2004, the number of elephants had fallen in most of the countries except Cambodia. Even though the elephants population in India witnessed a dramatic decrease, India was still the greatest population among others, with 7,500. Myanmar also felt gradually to 4,800 elephants, while other countries decline to below 2,800 elephants.




  • IELTS_Writing_Task_1.png


vangiespen - / 4077  
Nov 22, 2015   #2
Hi Muflih, the work that you do in all your essays are consistent. However the mistakes are also consistent. So I will just correct those mistakes for you below. I hope that it can help you learn how to better construct your sentences in the process.

A breakdown of the number of THE Asian Elephant population from 1994 to 2007 as a projected OVER years, a 7-year period is revealed in the graph. Overall, India was the nicest place for elephants to grow up among Asian countries, while China showed THE reverse.

In 1997, the enormous number of population of Asian elephants experienced WAS FOUND in India, a . Almost 10,000 elephants lived in India, while Myanmar saw A POPULATION approximately two times lower than of this . Thailand also shown WAS SEEN as HAVING the third highest of elephants population, even though it was only no more than 4,000. The other countries, SUCH AS CHINA, were not the best place for this species to breed, because they were POPULATION WAS solely less than 3,000 elephants.

... Even though the elephants population in India witnessed a dramatic decrease, . India was still HAD the greatest population among others, with 7,500. Myanmar also felt gradually to 4,800 elephants, while other countries declineD to below 2,800 elephants.


Home / Writing Feedback / 7-year period, 9 different countries - Asian Elephants Population 1997/2004
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳