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[TOEFL] young people should try different job before taking a career!



taylor kong 5 / 8  
Mar 17, 2011   #1
Young people should try several different jobs before they take a career in a long term. Agree or disagree?

A public debate on young people should try several different jobs before they take a career in a long term has arisen to attention. There are diverse attitudes from people with distinguishing backgrounds. Some people would like to directly to take a career without try any different jobs; while, other people prefer young people should try several different jobs. Personally speaking, I strongly agree with the issue that young people should try several different jobs before they take a career in a long term. There are several conspicuous aspects as follows.

Firstly, taking several different jobs can provide reference advisors to young people, whether they are really like the job or not. According to a statistics shows that several millions young people complained the job which they are taking, even worse, many young people offered their resignations to company, most of them is not taking any different job before taking a career in a long term. This is the reason that they do not like the job even hates it. Thus, I think that taking several different jobs is necessary step before taking a career in a long term.

Secondly, taking several different jobs can broaden young people's horizon, and enrich their experience. For example, a young people to interview with many practice experiences and a young people who is a graduate without any practice experience. The employers will recruit the young people who have practice experiences. When they meet some obstacles to conquer due to young people could provide several available solutions to solve the problem, at some extent, young people promote the company development and get more incomes for company.

Finally, interest is beginning of the success, it leads to job involvement and job involvement leads to enthusiasm and more response. Young people will regard job as an indispensible part of their life. This is necessary step in the procedure of career. Young people could enjoy happy or sad with the development of the job.

All in all, although some people may still remain unconvinced, the reason I have analyzed could at least make them more aware of the various dimensions of the issue under discussion. There is little doubt that more and more people will come to realize that young people should try several different jobs before taking a career in a long term.

everyone give me suggestions or help me to correct grammer!
thank you very much!

EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Mar 20, 2011   #2
Here are some more ideas, Taylor...

A public debate on the question of whether young people should try several ...

Use "trying"
Some people would like to directly to take a career without trying any different jobs; other people believe young people should try several different jobs.

Personally speaking, I strongly agree with the issue assertion that young people should ...

Finally, interest is the beginning of success, because it leads to job involvement, and job involvement leads to enthusiasm and more responsiveness.----Great sentence!! I just made some small changes.

Young people will regard their job as an indispensable part of their life. This is necessary step in the procedure of a career. Young people could enjoy happy or sad experiences during the development of their jobs.

All in all, although some people may still remain unconvinced. The rea son I have analyzed this question is that I want to at least make them more aware of the various dimensions of the issue under discussion. ----Wow, such excellent writing here!!

:-)


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