I am back in school and have a 500-600 word essay to write on my first college experience. Does anyone have any tips for an opening? I am pretty chatty but just can not come up with an opening..
Thanks, John
Thanks, John
First College Experience
Well, why don't you tell us about your first college experience? How did it differ from what you expected? How did you handle the changes That sort of thing. Then, once we have some idea of what your first college experience was actually like, we can give you some advice on how to craft a good opening to introduce the material.
Thank you for the reply and advice here is my start..
John
John
That's a good start. You have a sort of unique perspective as an older student who has to work a real job while still handling all of the academic material too. Now, decide what you want the point of the essay to be. You can ask yourself questions about how the experience affected you to brainstorm ideas for this: What did you learn from the experience? Did you feel more confident knowing that you were managing to handle both? What did you gain from studying the history of America through a class instead of just reading about it on your own? Once you've found something that seems important to you, revise the essay and tie all of the details back to that point.
Sean's right, you do have a unique perspective! Just that fact alone will make your essay refreshing and new to whoever reads it. Have fun with it, don't be stressed out. Post it here and we'll help fix any glitches!
Good luck!
:)
Good luck!
:)
Oh, and I forgot to give you this fix for para #1:
When one of my daughtersjust graduated from high school and on her way to college , I decided that there was very little horse power behind my advice about finishing college before going on to work or a relationship. So, after completing a very difficult, year-long project at work, which required me to spend many hours studying I decided to take my own advice and register for a summer class in history. That first class covered the history of America through 1877 -- an era I have always enjoyed studying ...
For powerful writing, omit all unnecessary words!
When one of my daughters
For powerful writing, omit all unnecessary words!
I appreciate all the feedback I will work on finishing the essay this weekend.
Thank You, John
Thank You, John
Here you go please comment or make suggestions.
When one of my daughters graduated from high school, I decided that there was very little horsepower behind my advice about finishing college before going on to work or a relationship. So I nervously decided to take my own advice and register for a summer class in history. That first class covered the history of America through 1877 -- an era I have always enjoyed studying.
Even though I had gone into the military after high school, I had always championed the benefits of an advanced education to my children, co-workers and family. My friends and family had listened to me discuss going back to school numerous times over the years, always talking about that next semester or that next year when I was going to start school. Some way or another I always found an excuse for not registering, usually using the excuse of work or family obligations.
The project that has occupied most of my time over the last year had required me to spend many hours studying or analyzing data in order to certify in Six Sigma, a quality improvement process through the use of statistical analysis. As I prepared for my final presentation I started to think that there was no time in my life where I would be more prepared to enter college. During the project I had developed the study and time management habits that would allow me to successfully work and go to school. I was growing tired of being a hypocrite and felt the pressure to act before my daughter beat me to a degree. I discussed going back to school with work and my family, we all agreed the time was here.
As I walked towards the academic counselor's office for the first time I was not sure what I expected from my college experience. I had not been on a campus for a good 25 years except to visit the one my daughter was going to attend. As I walked around the campus registering, collecting books and familiarizing myself with the campus I felt a strange feeling of pride and giddiness within myself. As I look back now I imagine I was as nervous as any college freshman who was starting their first semester, though many years older. At every opportunity I had I would sit down and soak in the atmosphere, watch my fellow students, and the feel the excitement. I felt like it was a new beginning, the start of something positive and exciting. I often wondered if others around me felt the same. I had finally followed through with something that I had talked about for years. I was proud of myself.
History 1301, American history through 1877, was an excellent choice for my first class. The class covered a period of time I am interested in and that I regularly read about in my own time. As a result, the homework was never agonizing but instead enjoyable. During those few times the course covered topics I had a hard time getting into I found that I could always fall back on my favored learning tool- the simple 3*5 index card. It appears my first college experience involved many hours of memorization, something the 3*5 index card handles with aplomb. Though I occasionally found myself pressed for time to prepare for an exam, in the end I walked away from the class with a positive attitude. I have a little more pride in myself and an "A" .
With my first college experience over, I can now practice what I preach. I look forward to my next semester; already I talk of continuing to my masters' degree. I find my only regrets are that I did not start sooner and that I can not attend school full time.
When one of my daughters graduated from high school, I decided that there was very little horsepower behind my advice about finishing college before going on to work or a relationship. So I nervously decided to take my own advice and register for a summer class in history. That first class covered the history of America through 1877 -- an era I have always enjoyed studying.
Even though I had gone into the military after high school, I had always championed the benefits of an advanced education to my children, co-workers and family. My friends and family had listened to me discuss going back to school numerous times over the years, always talking about that next semester or that next year when I was going to start school. Some way or another I always found an excuse for not registering, usually using the excuse of work or family obligations.
The project that has occupied most of my time over the last year had required me to spend many hours studying or analyzing data in order to certify in Six Sigma, a quality improvement process through the use of statistical analysis. As I prepared for my final presentation I started to think that there was no time in my life where I would be more prepared to enter college. During the project I had developed the study and time management habits that would allow me to successfully work and go to school. I was growing tired of being a hypocrite and felt the pressure to act before my daughter beat me to a degree. I discussed going back to school with work and my family, we all agreed the time was here.
As I walked towards the academic counselor's office for the first time I was not sure what I expected from my college experience. I had not been on a campus for a good 25 years except to visit the one my daughter was going to attend. As I walked around the campus registering, collecting books and familiarizing myself with the campus I felt a strange feeling of pride and giddiness within myself. As I look back now I imagine I was as nervous as any college freshman who was starting their first semester, though many years older. At every opportunity I had I would sit down and soak in the atmosphere, watch my fellow students, and the feel the excitement. I felt like it was a new beginning, the start of something positive and exciting. I often wondered if others around me felt the same. I had finally followed through with something that I had talked about for years. I was proud of myself.
History 1301, American history through 1877, was an excellent choice for my first class. The class covered a period of time I am interested in and that I regularly read about in my own time. As a result, the homework was never agonizing but instead enjoyable. During those few times the course covered topics I had a hard time getting into I found that I could always fall back on my favored learning tool- the simple 3*5 index card. It appears my first college experience involved many hours of memorization, something the 3*5 index card handles with aplomb. Though I occasionally found myself pressed for time to prepare for an exam, in the end I walked away from the class with a positive attitude. I have a little more pride in myself and an "A" .
With my first college experience over, I can now practice what I preach. I look forward to my next semester; already I talk of continuing to my masters' degree. I find my only regrets are that I did not start sooner and that I can not attend school full time.
...the one my daughter is going to attend.
As I look back now I imagine I was as nervous as any college freshman who was starting his or her first semester, though many years older. At every opportunity, I had I would sit down and soak in the atmosphere, watch my fellow students, and the feel the excitement.
Some of these ideas above are not necessary, just my ideas upon reading this. You are great! Perhaps as nervous as the other students, but probably also much more appreciative and reflective. Any admissions person will be won over by this honest and charismatic essay.
Some of these ideas above are not necessary, just my ideas upon reading this. You are great! Perhaps as nervous as the other students, but probably also much more appreciative and reflective. Any admissions person will be won over by this honest and charismatic essay.
Kevin
Thank You for the help. It is interesting comparing my college experience to my daughters. I can actually see some benefit to being an older student. Living on campus has been a great and occasionally heart breaking experience for her.
John
Thank You for the help. It is interesting comparing my college experience to my daughters. I can actually see some benefit to being an older student. Living on campus has been a great and occasionally heart breaking experience for her.
John