Hi everyone,
The prompt is this: Please compose an essay of 250 to 500 words that states your purpose in undertaking study in the health sciences at XXX. You should describe your academic objectives and career plans and discuss your related qualifications, including collegiate, professional, and community activities and any other substantial accomplishments not already mentioned on the application form.
This is a supplemental essay so it goes along with another longer essay that I also posted on this forum. Anyways the first draft I wrote of this was 700 words and I cut it down to 500. It doesn't flow as well as it did with more words. Can someone please edit this for me or comment on the flow and content? Thanks you so much for your help! Kris
It was the summer before I started high school and I sat with my mother at our neighbor's kitchen table. He was wheezing, which made the rubber tubes in his nose rattle as if they were about to fall out. My mother, always a nurse even on weekends, placed a stethoscope on his back to listen to his lungs. "I'm not a doctor," she told him. "But I believe there may be fluid in your lungs. You need to see a physician regularly to manage your CHF." Of course, this was easier said than done. The nearest clinic was almost thirty miles away and he, like many of the people who lived in the area, didn't have a reliable means of transportation. My mother made some calls and the next day he was transported to a local clinic where he was given the care he needed. It is stories like these that have inspired me to pursue a career in healthcare with the hopes of making care more affordable and accessible.
Over the past four years, I have worked in primary care research investigating the leading causes of preventable death in the United States: smoking, hypertension, and obesity. The need for more primary care providers and the challenges of working in the field have led me to pursue a career as a primary care physician assistant (PA). My ultimate goal in pursuing a dual degree in Public Health and Physician Assistant Studies is to gain the tools to make a lasting health impact on the community I serve. First and foremost, a public health education will enable me to practice medicine in a way that addresses the social and environmental determinants of disease. A secondary goal is to gain the skills to evaluate medical literature and confidently implement evidence-based medicine in my everyday practice. Lastly, I hope to use my knowledge to develop and raise funds for community programs that focus on education and prevention. Through my volunteer work, I have seen how free or low-cost programs that are accessible to underserved populations can serve as a cornerstone for future advances in community health.
The dual-degree program at XXX is best suited to help me achieve these goals. I was first drawn to the program because of its location in our nation's capital, which is an ideal place to study health policy and develop my own opinions. The diversity of the XXX area and the underserved wards of the city offer a prime location to study both public health and the clinical competencies of the PA program. I was also drawn to the program because of its dedication to community service. Hands-on field experience through service to the community is a great way to learn about public health. As you can see, the XXX dual-degree program is a good fit for my goals and ambition. With an education from XXX I know that I will make a lasting impact on the people I serve.
Without looking at your essay, make some lists for me.
Limit each item on each list to ten or fewer words. Sentence fragments are fine.
1. List three academic objectives (things you hope to get out of this school/program)
2. List three human reasons why you want to pursue the career you've chosen.
3. If possible, cite ONE noteworthy thing you've accomplished at school.
4. If possible, cite ONE noteworthy thing you've accomplished at work.
5. If possible, cite ONE noteworthy thing you've accomplished in your community.
