Nursing is an exciting, ever-changing, and demanding field with doctorally prepared nurses as the leaders of this profession.
As I read the intro, I can already tell you are a great communicator. When I get to the end of the intro, though, I have to tell you that you did not establish a great theme.
Use the last sentence of your first para to plant an idea for the reader to consider. This idea you gave at the end of the first para is not one that helps the reader to appreciate your passion for the work, your noble aspirations, etc. Make it so that this essay expresses your unique combination of ideas to offer the field of nursing. What is YOUR personal/professional theme? I am sure you have given a lot of thought to the philosophy of nursing.
As a registered nurse, I was a team-member in the only Level III Neonatal Intensive Care Unit in northeast Kansas.
When I look at this first sentence of paragraph 2, I think this is not a good first sentence for a paragraph. The first sentence of the paragraph should express the main idea of the paragraph. This sentence should be the second sentence of the paragraph, because it gives an example to demonstrate the idea you express.
Okay, so my advice is like this: Google "paragraph topic sentence" to help you powerfully express 2 or 3 solid ideas that add up to your main idea. Express your main idea, the single idea you want the reader to remember, at the end of the first paragraph.
And what should that idea be? It should be the perfect sentence to express your unique "purpose," your unique approach to nursing.
Another way to express your unique perspective is to cite some research articles and mention some types of research you would like to do. Mention some books and articles that you have read recently.