DPT Professionalism 2017 personal essay draft

I am not sure if I have answered "What is professionalism in the context of being a student in a doctor of physical therapist degree program?" in my essay, I would really like a couple of pointers from others.

the qualities of DPT program student

Professionalism is the top mechanism that supports a professional of any type of career, educational program or volunteer position. Professionalism in all fields, especially in the medical field, holds compassion, communication, high ethical codes, reliability and the desire to benefit others. Being a professional in any occupation, like a physical therapist or a student, involves responsibility of one's actions, education and accountability. There is much more behind being a student than countless study sessions. Each of the qualities originates through the individual's educational background and are engraved through their personal desire to prosper in their area. There are certain traits that are vital for all potential students who are entering a doctor of physical therapist degree program because a good foundation is always key to a propitious profession.

As a young child, materialistic items were scarce but my parents offered a better alternative, they embedded great moral values, responsibility and commitment. They took pride in surrounding me with a strong base of independence, integrity and confidence. I know that hard work is a good way to achieve greater things in life. For those reasons, I try to put every part of me into everything that I do to succeed in anything that I do.

Essential qualities a student in a DPT program must embrace are strong ethics, compassion, and reliability. I believe each of those qualities can produce a prodigious student, physical therapist and individual. A student who is accountable, persistent and compassionate in any educational course reflects a bright future. I feel that I have successfully exhibited these values as part of my experience through shadowing sessions. My experiences with the different physical therapists opened my eyes to what I want to pursue my further education in. I feel that I had great examples of physical therapists during my shadowing process because they all held themselves to be very professional with each of their different patients.

While I was shadowing at an outpatient clinic, I could distinguish each of the core qualities in every individual that practiced there. John was the PT I followed and he demonstrated a very compassionate practice with each of his patients. He never spoke negatively about anyone and held each patient on a throne during their session. He communicated well with his patients by talking them through step by step during each exercise or manual therapy session, as well as getting the message across in simple terms about at home exercises and precautions. The clinic was busy at times, serving around three to six patients consecutively, John (PT), and three PTAs communicated very well on who would treat who and who had done what. I was also thrown into the rushes by providing heat and cold packs, stem, cleaning up the work tables. The staff were dependent on each other to provide excellent treatment and the best efficient recovery for their patients. They set great standards of what to expect in the physical therapy field and during the educational path.

Medical ethics are always carefully practiced in the medical field and student life. A student in a DPT program should enter the field with a comprehensive understanding of beneficence. I gained a tremendous understanding through observations from my shadowing at a hospital. Each PT carried a copious amount of patience as well as respectfulness towards their patients'. In the hospital setting, there was a lot of patients that were "MAX" meaning they needed all the help they could get to perform the simplest tasks, such as sitting up, etc. There was a lot trust built between the patient and the PT. My shadowing provided a gratifying feeling once we saw progress in patients. I saw improvement in patients and it was a great emotion knowing I could witness and even contribute to their progression.

Each trait of professionalism can shape a student in a DPT program into becoming an exceptional PT. Excellent students demonstrate empathy, balance in their life and most importantly the desire to help others. Commitment in education and accountability in every step of the way can account for a long successful path. I may not be as honored as others, but I believe I am a good fit because I am a reliable, committed and altruistic individual and student. Overall, I believe that I possess a well-developed degree of professionalism, which I have gained throughout my education and experience.

Be as critical as you need to be.

America, the first two paragraphs are unnecessary in the essay. The first paragraph sounds like you are lecturing the reviewer about professionalism. That is something that you should avoid doing as reviewers are highly trained individuals who know more about the job and what the essay requires than the applicant ever will. So talking down to the reviewer will only irritate the person. Remove that reference.

The paragraph about how you were as a young child is also irrelevant. It does not apply to the adult definition of professionalism. Although the paragraph shows me that you are a good person with a kind heart. Sadly, that is just word filler at this point. The essay should begin and follow through from the point where you discuss the essential qualities a student in the DPT program should have.

Try to focus less on the activities of the practitioner that you shadowed and instead, describe how you learned about professionalism during that time. Make sure to highlight the reasons why you feel that this person embodied professionalism in the practice of PT. Make sure that you emphasize how this person served to be your role model and the ideal of a professional in the workplace whom you plan to emulate.

@Holt
Thank you, I appreciate the feedback and i will definitely work on each of those items. I did a little revision but I still would have to remove some parts.

It is still very similar but I am not sure what I should completely remove...

Professionalism is the top mechanism that supports a professional of any type of career, educational program or volunteer position. In my opinion, professionalism in all fields, especially in the medical field, exhibits compassion, communication, high ethical codes and the desire to benefit others. A professional in any occupation, like a physical therapist or a student, holds strong work ethics, strives for educational growth and demonstrates empathy day to day. There is much more behind being a student than countless study sessions. Each of the qualities originates through the individual's educational background and are engraved through their personal desire to prosper. There are certain traits that are vital for all potential students who are entering a doctor of physical therapist degree program because a good foundation is always key to a propitious professional future.

Growing up, materialistic items were scarce but my parents offered an alternative, they embedded great moral values, responsibility and a strong sense of commitment. They surrounded me with a sturdy base of integrity and confidence because they wanted me to succeed in life. I know hard work is a worthy way to achieve greater things in life. For those reasons, I try to put everything into what I do to succeed in anything that I do, such as in school, work and my personal life.

Essential qualities a student in a DPT program must embrace are strong work ethics and empathy. A student who is accountable and determined in any educational course reflects a bright future because they prioritize growth. They are punctual with their work as well as flexible in unexpected situations. I believe each of these qualities can produce a prodigious student, PT and individual. I have effectively exhibited these values throughout my life and through my experience across shadowing sessions. My experiences with different physical therapists confirmed what I want to pursue my further education in. I enjoyed seeing the techniques each PT used on different body types because it proved there was no limit a PT could not reach out to help. I feel I had great examples of physical therapists because they all held themselves to be very professional in their area, with their patients and with each other.

While shadowing at an outpatient clinic, I could distinguish the core qualities in every individual who practiced there. John was the PT I followed and he demonstrated a very compassionate practice with all his patients. He communicated well by guiding them through step by step during exercises or manual therapy sessions, as well as simplifying the at home exercises and precautions. John and three PTAs communicated very well on who would treat who and who had done what. I helped by providing heat and cold packs, stem, and cleaning up the work tables. The staff were dependent on each other to provide excellent treatment and efficient recovery for their patients. They set great standards of what to expect in the physical therapy field.

Medical ethics are [...] understanding of beneficence. The goal of a PT is to produce a good recovery and diminish the bad. The goal of a student is to learn productive healing methods and reduce the chance of causing harm. I gained a tremendous understanding through shadowing at a hospital. Each PT carried a copious amount of patience, respectfulness towards patients' and knowledge. I admired that every PT could concisely describe the facture, injury or post-surgery to the patient to guarantee serenity. In the hospital, there were patients who were considered "MAX" meaning they needed maximum assistance to perform the simplest tasks, such as sitting up. Here, trust was built between the patient and the PT because at times they moved as one. I was exuberant to have witnessed healthy recoveries in patients. Over time I saw magnificent improvement and it was gratifying knowing I contributed to their progression.

Each trait of professionalism ...

You should remove the second paragraph because that is more of a personal backgrounder on your part rather than a discussion of professionalism. paragraph about shadowing John, the more I read about it, seems to stick out like a sore thumb because it removes the focus of the discussion from you and your definition of professionalism. It instead, focuses the essay on the workings of a PT and how he does his job which, although related to professionalism, isn't what the prompt is asking for. If you just remove that reference and focus on your definition of professionalism instead, based on the remaining paragraphs, the essay should be better off. It will become more interconnected, focus on your point of view, and deliver the definition and discussion that the prompt requires. You don't need justifying examples in this essay because when you present examples, you tend to remove the focus from the original discussion. In order to stay on point, avoid using examples in your essay.

@Holt
thank you so much:)