Evaluate profile for MS in Data Science Fall 2017

Statement of Purpose

Introduction
I am planning to do master in data science because I find data science very interesting for various reasons and opportunities that this field will provide ample scopes to grow in future. Data science is an emerging field of research and holds promises for Information Technology fields. Five years down the line I want to be known by my work as an adept and successful data scientist. Further in future I want to startup my own company purely based on data science.

Undergraduate and Job
During Undergraduate I studied several computer science subjects including data mining as an elective. Coding is my keen hobby to involve since beginning of engineering program. Besides the assignments, I was actively participating in various coding competitions like Hackathon, engaged in a programmer in different online programs. To garnish my algorithm with updated information concepts various online sites served as major income for me. Inter colleges' competition served as platform that I used time to time to calibrate my understanding. I had always been fascinated about computer learning and algorithms. Currently, I am working as full time paid application engineer in Oracle India. I am working on developing a resource planning product. My responsibilities include designing, analysing, coding and unit testing based on customer's requirements. Research is a major part in our work where I have to find out multiple plausible ways to handle the given problem. During one and half years of experience, I had got thorough grip on coding following professional protocols.

Research Interest
My major field of interests lies in data mining and machine learning. My final year project was Semi- Supervised learning for Imbalanced Classification. It aims at developing an algorithm that use small amount of labelled and larger amount of unlabelled data. However, the uniqueness to the algorithm designed is that it does not assume balance between positive and negative samples in the data- set which is a significant requisite for other techniques to work. Oversampling is another key feature in the designed project. This project taught me different insights to handle data, which are increasing unrestricted.

Why this University?
Understanding real time challenges and tackling them with full preparation demands thorough understanding of the subject both theoretically and practically. The University of XYZ provides an open platform for interaction of thousands of students to perform and achieve once dream. I always want to be among people belonging to different geographical regions and this university committed towards diversity yet with common objective will provide my dream come true. The multi cultured and linguistic environment that prevails in this University will certainly provide ground to interact people across world to build up a community working towards common vision.

to grow in future --- in the future
During undergraduate -- during the undergraduate program
that use - uses small amount of

Pallaw, in your introduction, make it brief and concise by removing the sentence that goes " I find data science..." Add the information about data science in its place. That creates a more coherent understanding of your reason for wanting to study the course and collates the focus of the essay onto a singular topic for your introduction.

In the portion about your research interest, you have to show the progression of your current information with a specific progressive question that will relate to your required learning in this particular course. What new question do you wish to discover an answer to and why? What purpose will the thesis paper have in your career in the future? How will it apply to the wider scope of your field of work? You cannot simply enumerate your interests in the field and the past research you have done. A statement of purpose always has to include a potential thesis project to show a clear career progression on your part.

Save for those two portions, the rest of the information that you provide is enough to become part of the final essay form. I look forward to reading your revised essay. I am almost certain that it will be in its final form by then.

Hi please evaluate these two sections:
Introduction:
I am applying to the MS in computer science program and to do research on the advanced concepts in areas of Data mining and Machine Learning. Bases on my experience at a Data science based institutes helped me realised the urge to improve my skills as this is emerging research field and holds promises for Information Technology sector. Five years down the line I want to be known by my work as an adept and successful data scientist. Further in future I want to start-up my own company purely based on data solving.

Research:
My major field of interest lies in data mining and machine learning. These being hot topics in the current market, will certainly provide me with ample challenging problems, which I would love to handle with gratitude. My final year project was Semi-Supervised learning for Imbalanced Classification. It aims at developing an algorithm that uses small amount of labeled and larger amount of unlabeled data. However, the uniqueness to the classification designed is that it does not assume balance between positive and negative samples in the data-set unlike other techniques. The project firstly provide ideas on principal of machine learning and updated with extant techniques and methods. Having said that specifically, I want to work on classifiers. While reading voraciously on recent research papers on machine learning, it was upsetting to find that absence of a best method to design ensembles classifier which can include multiple learning features at a stretch, is causing serious hindrance in growth and development of machine learning applications.

Pallaw, this still isn't going to work for your application. Your statement of purpose paragraph is confusing and does not clearly represent your purpose for applying. Your research inspiration should be presented as a separately developed paragraph that explains the reason behind your purpose. What is your research thesis? Why is it relevant to your purpose? How will your education at this university help you achieve those goals? I don't read any response to these questions that are standard questions for the development of your statement of purpose. You need to revise your opening statement based upon the previously stated concerns.

With regards to your research presentation. You have to consider your work experience in relation to what your thesis / research paper may be. Look at the flaws of the field you are working in in relation to data mining. Consider your college thesis question. Does your college thesis have any relation with your interest and desire to do more research in data mining at this point in your career? It would be beneficial to your essay if you can show a solid foundation for your interest in this field stemming from your college days.

That type of discussion will provide an insight into the type of continuing education that you are hoping to achieve by enrolling in this masters class. Normally, the interest in research for a masters degree comes from two places, the college thesis and the current work experience. See if you can find a way to combine those two in order to develop a proper thesis statement for your MS studies. That will be the anchor upon which you will stake your MS education. If your thesis statement is impressive enough, along with your work experience, and college education, you just might catch the reviewer's eye. Additionally, you can focus on how the university can help you achieve that status? Mentioning their abilities as an educational institution and expressing a desire to work with some of their specific professors, whose research aligns with yours will also help your paper.

Your five year plan needs to be more detailed. How do you hope to climb the professional ladder within that time in order to achieve your goal? How do you see yourself advancing the data mining field within 5 years? Be specific. Don't just present a generalized plan that obviously shows that you do not have a developed study and career plan for your immediate career upon graduation.

Needless to say, you still have not developed a usable foundation for your essay. I hope that you will be able to do more than just develop the foundation for your proper statement of purpose using the guidelines I have set before you.