"I can either watch it happen, or be a part of it."
-Elon Musk
Hailing from a country which is the world's third largest emitter of CO2 and has consistently faced power shortage, I have watched several governmental policies trying ineffectively to make India independent of fossil fuels. Starting my basic education in India, I have seen and been a part of sustainability societies that work towards making everyday life of people more environment friendly. Exposure to such an environment has instilled a deep sense of purpose and desire to be a part of energy engineering society, to make the world a better place to live. My goal is to make clean energy accessible to every small village and city in the world. This interest of mine led me to specialize in Microelectronics while pursuing my Bachelors in Chemical Engineering from Asia's leading university, National University of Singapore.
Upon graduating I started my career as a Field Service Engineer in waste water treatment and environmental services. Here I witnessed the fast growing innovations occurring in the process water management sector. Same can be said about energy engineering, especially in the solar sector. Despite taking online courses from Lund University and Harvard University about sustainable energy management and solar energy, I have realized that to be able to make a significantly positive impact in the energy sector requires more than just the basics. The thirst for knowledge and the desire to grow the energy sector sustainably has reinforced my decision to enroll in the master's course at your university.
Currently working as Field Service Engineer, I am consulting several petroleum refining companies with COGEN project, a project aimed to reduce the dependency on grid generated power. An idea proposed by my team implemented the usage of natural gas pipeline and CNG for electricity generation and transportation instead of Gasoline, the most commonly used fuel in Singapore. The data analysis I performed showed a faster return of investment and lower mitigation cost for Natural gas, while reducing the CO2 emission by 30% annually. By being the consultant for COGEN project has helped the grasp the importance and urgency of shifting from fossil fuels to alternative fuel.
A comprehensive view of renewable energy is my educational goal. My final year dissertation project at NUS involved depositing monolayers of neurotransmitters on the surface of Silicon wafers. As a way of this project I have developed a deep interest in research and in the future, I would like to study the mechanism and effectiveness of depositing Graphene monolayers on solar cells.
I did my senior secondary schooling from Oman, a country heavily dependent on oil for its energy production. Having lived in the Middle East and South East Asia, I see a large potential for renewable energy that is not being tapped into. With the right king of research, renewable energy sector can be grown to a large extent.
My 5-year goal upon graduation is to set up a company that is capable of providing engineering consultation and services in every renewable energy sector. I believe this can be possible with the course offered by your university which has a perfect mix of entrepreneurial and technical engineering courses. This renewable energy future is not far or un-achievable. With hard work and determination and the right kind of support, such potential can be tapped into. With a world divided because of oil, renewable energy is the way to peace and sustainability, and I would like to be a part of it.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15389 Malavika, I am not sure how the quote of Elon Musk relates to your motivation to pursue a masters in Renewable Energy. Unless you can tie in that quote to something personal about your desire to become a renewable energy expert, the quote doesn't really make sense. While the rest of your essay is really interesting, it would be nice if you could include a part about why you were motivated to enroll at this particular university. In a motivational letter, you are expected to show a semblance of how studying at the university has served to motivate you to reach for a higher level of academic learning. Look into the masters program of the university and deliver at least a paragraph long explanation of how the university curriculum or training program has helped to further motivate your desire to learn how to help your country through the use of alternative energy.
Speaking of alternative energy, I believe that you should add a summation of the existing problems in energy that your country has, aside from the ineffective government rules, that have motivated you to pursue this course. For example, you can explain a particular problem in energy resources or something related to your course that you hope to develop a better understanding of in order to better deal with the situation back home.
Another thing that you can do to help you further improve your letter is read the instructions the university provides for the content of an applicants motivational letter. What specific information does the university look for? Maybe some special student abilities or traits are required of the applicants. It does not sound to me like you consulted the university website or application packet before you wrote this letter. So you have to double check the requirements and make sure that your essay properly represents the reviewer's expectations in order to create a better chance of writing a supportive motivational letter.
Thank you @holt :) Will work on the changes
The college website doesn't have any requirement for motivational letter. I would like to present an idea about my background and why I want to take up this particular course. Please read and give me your feedback :)
Hailing from a country which is the world's third largest emitter of CO2 and has consistently faced power shortage, I have watched several governmental policies trying ineffectively to make India independent of fossil fuels. Starting my basic education in India, I have seen and been a part of sustainability societies that work towards making everyday life of people more environment friendly. Exposure to such an environment has instilled a deep sense of purpose and desire to be a part of energy engineering society, to make the world a better place to live. My goal is to make clean energy accessible to every small village and city in the world. This interest of mine led me to specialize in Microelectronics while pursuing my Bachelors in Chemical Engineering from Asia's leading university, National University of Singapore.
My final year dissertation project at NUS involved depositing monolayers of neurotransmitters on the surface of Silicon wafers. As a way of this project I have developed a deep interest in research and in the future, I would like to study the mechanism and effectiveness of depositing Graphene monolayers on solar cells. I did my senior secondary schooling from Oman, a country heavily dependent on oil for its energy production. Having lived in the Middle East and South East Asia, I see a large potential for renewable energy that is not being tapped into. With the right king of research, renewable energy sector can be grown to a large extent.
Upon graduating I started my career as a Field Service Engineer at GE Water and Process Technologies. I am currently consulting several petroleum refining companies with COGEN project, a project aimed to reduce the dependency on grid generated power. An idea proposed by my team implemented the usage of natural gas pipeline and CNG for electricity generation and transportation instead of Gasoline, the most commonly used fuel in Singapore. The data analysis I performed showed a faster return of investment and lower mitigation cost for Natural gas, while reducing the CO2 emission by 30% annually. By being the consultant for COGEN project has helped me grasp the importance and urgency of shifting from fossil fuels to alternative fuel.
While at GE Water, I witnessed the fast growing innovations occurring in the process water management sector. Same can be said about energy engineering, especially in the solar sector. Despite taking online courses from Lund University and Harvard University about sustainable energy management and solar energy, I have realized that to be able to make a significantly positive impact in the energy sector requires more than just the basics. The thirst for knowledge and the desire to grow the energy sector sustainably has reinforced my decision to enroll in the RENE master's course at KIC InnoEnergy.
A comprehensive view of renewable energy is my educational goal. My 5-year goal upon graduation is to set up a company that is capable of providing engineering consultation and services in every renewable energy sector. As a beginner in the energy engineering field, I require a comprehensive course that improves my knowledge in research, engineering and entrepreneurship. I believe the RENE Master's program is a perfect match for providing me the knowledge I require, while also offering hands on collaboration with startups and corporations with a similar vision and mission. I trust that the 100% renewable energy future I believe in, is not far or unachievable. With hard work, determination and the right kind of support, such potential can be tapped into. With a world divided because of oil, renewable energy is the way to peace and sustainability, and I would like to be a part of it.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15389 Malika, your letter doesn't really work very well because you have presented too much information in it. a motivational letter should not include an intensive description of your academic background and work experience. It should only reflect the motivation stemming from a problem that you see in your country that is related to your field of work that you hope to help solve through additional education and training on your part. So the motivational letter should discuss the problem and why you want to resolve the problem. You should not include a 5 year career plan in this letter. Instead, you should convince the reviewer about why you decided to choose to enroll at their university. Explain why you feel that an education from this institution will best prepare you for the next phase of your career.
So basically, you need to only present 3 things in this letter:
1. The reason behind your desire to enroll in this course (Problem the country is facing or career challenge you hope to overcome.)
2. How your interest in this problem developed within your profession (Do not include educational information.)
3. Why you chose this university (Base the reason on the curriculum, training, network development offered by the university) and how you hope the university can help you better prepare for your future in this field.
Save the other information in this letter for your post study plans and statement of purpose along with your study goals. These information will still come in handy during the application process.