Dear mgarthwaite,
I wrote about the courses, because I wanted to tell them why I am particularly interested in that Master program, to show them that I invested considerable time in doing research about the program and came to the conclusion, based on my extensive research, that the AM program is the one and only, which would make me happy. Further, I talked about my old program to demonstrate that I was clearly unhappy with its mathematical level, and that I am academically interested in Math. You find my attributes in the last paragraph (concerning how well I did at undergrad.). Could you please comment on whether the sections fail to show these aspects?
Here is my revised version:
All applicants - please upload a personal statement that describes your academic interests and your purpose and objectives in undertaking graduate study. If you are applying for a Master's or diploma programme this is your opportunity to introduce yourself to the selectors. Please describe your academic background, strengths/interests, ambitions/research interests. If your chosen programme has more than one stream (e.g. MSc Social Research Methods) you should indicate which stream you are interested in following.
Dear Madam, dear Sir;
I am happy to write you this letter applying for the Master in Applicable Mathematics at the London School of Economics and Political Science. My name is M and I currently study International Economic Studies in my fifth semester at Maastricht University, Netherlands.
Why I want to pursue a mathematics graduate program:
Prior to University, I had already a keen interest in economic topics and mathematical concepts. During my first year in Maastricht, I attended several economics courses, which steadily increased the level of mathematics. I made acquaintance with differential equations and advanced linear algebra. At first, I enjoyed learning about these new quantitative concepts, but after a while the level did not advance further. At the end, the mathematical level was clearly too superficial to please my thirst for knowledge of mathematical foundations underlying economic concepts. After completion of the first year, the Maastricht Honors Colloquium was impressed by my exceptional academic track record, so its president invited me to join their Honors Programme.
The Honors Programme provides young students with a variety of opportunities to become familiar with professional research, ultimately encouraging them to pursue a career in this field. I was delighted by the idea to use the Honors Programme to advance in Mathematics, and thus accepted the offer. The Honors Programme influenced my position on both, pursuing a mathematical graduate program and following a research career. First, the Honors Programme allowed me to participate in additional courses, which were freely available to my choice. Consequently, I selected mathematically and quantitatively focused courses. One of them was Dynamic Modelling and Dynamic Optimisation, a third year quantitative economics elective, which taught me to apply maximum principles to optimal control problems, and use Mathematica. Another was Macroeconomics and Finance, a second year econometrics course, which discussed mathematical foundations underlying financial and economic concepts on levels above that of my own study program. The extra courses met my interest more than the ones from my regular study, but my thirst for knowledge were not fully satisfied. I realized that only a mathematical graduate program could live up to my level of interest. Second, the Honors Programme provided me with a unique chance to substitute the usual bachelor thesis for an extended research project, the so called MARBLE (Maastricht Research Based Learning) thesis. MARBLE projects normally last four month and take place during the final semester, although I completed mine already during year two. Within the boundaries I faced, my field of research was strategic interaction, more precisely auction theory. For my final thesis, titled Optimal auctions for bounded rational markdown bidders and implications, I was awarded with a nine, the highest grade among all strategic interaction projects. During my research and writing process, I once more realized that a career in research greatly appeals to me. Among many reasons, conducting research gives me the feeling that I valuably contribute to society, it also satisfies my curiosity and offers me an opportunity to live my passion for mathematics and economics. I truly want to advance in higher mathematics due to pure interest in the subject, but more importantly because sophisticated mathematical tools would clearly contribute to my further research. I believe your master program in Applicable Mathematics at the London School of Economics and Political Science perfectly meets these criteria.
Why I want to join LSE's Master in Applicable Mathematics:
Several aspects distinct LSE's Applicable Mathematics from other quantitative studies and make the program my primary choice. First, the program encourages one to combine fields of applied mathematics with economics and finance. Hence, the program would allow me to better understand the mathematics underlying various economics-related areas. For instance, during my bachelor studies, I attended many economics classes, in which we discussed preferences and optimal choices. The topic greatly interested me, however, the course structure often did not allow for mathematical analysis on levels, which would have completely satisfied my curiosity. Courses such as Preferences, Optimal Portfolio Choice, and Equilibrium particularly interest me. These courses provide students with an in-depth knowledge of mathematical foundations, but to an extent far above my previous courses. Second, Applicable Mathematics would provide me with more sophisticated mathematical tools facilitating my research ambitions. In particular, I am keen to acquire more knowledge in time series analysis. Looking at past classes in this field, Quantitative Methods courses dealt with econometric concepts and statistics. We proofed several characteristics of multiple regression methods, became familiar with advanced multivariable optimization, learnt to solve discrete as well as continuous dynamic systems, and many more. Towards the end of Quantitative Methods III, I also gained experience in time series analysis, unfortunately, on a basic level. What interests me most about time series analysis is the clear link to dynamic models, and the ability to empirically assess the validity of these dynamic models over time. The Applicable Mathematics course Non-Linear Dynamics and the Analysis of Real Time Series would provide me with an adequate level of skills, and thus substantially benefit my future research. Besides the program's content, another advantage is that LSE's Applicable Mathematics attracts highly motivated and intelligent people taught in small classes and seminars. My personal opinion is that such a learning environment opens interesting discussions uncovering perspectives, often substantially different from one's own personal point of view. Working together with people, who come from diverse backgrounds and who are similarly motivated as I am, truly contributes to my own drive to steadily grow and to constantly investigate issues from different point of views. Summarizing all evaluated aspects, LSE's Master in Applicable Mathematics perfectly meets my requirements for an ideal graduate program due to its in-depth insights in mathematical foundations underlying economics, the discussed mathematical tools, and the perfect discussion environment.
Why you should choose me:
Several further characteristics make me an interesting candidate to LSE's Master in Applicable Mathematics. Although I faced significant higher work load due to the Honors Programme, I still managed to finish the first two years with the highest grade point average among all students, receiving twice Maastricht's Top 3% Award. However, I can valuably contribute to your class by much more than just my GPA. Another characteristic comprises my extensive teaching experience. From my fourteenth birthday onwards, I first volunteered as a judo trainer assistant, and later became a judo trainer myself. After I finished my A-Levels, and left Germany for a gap year in Guatemala and South-Africa, I started helping in hospitals for invalid and AIDS suffering children. Again, I took the role as a teacher and helped these children to learn basic skills such as reading. Teaching gives me the feeling that I am making my own tiny contributions to society's change towards a better world. After my studies began, I was keen to teach again and indeed received a chance to do so. During the fourth semester, Maastricht University employed me to tutor classes of the first year finance course. Beforehand, the university provided me with extensive training in encouraging people to actively participate in discussions, ensuring efficient working conditions among group members during projects, and leading teams achieving a common goal. Motivated by the responsibility for my students, I focused on using these learnt skills to best prepare my tutorial groups for the upcoming finance exam. Moreover, I developed my team leading skills further by accepting the challenge to organize an international career event as the chairperson of the IES Alumniday 2011. There, I had the responsibility to coordinate a team of six students to setup financing and marketing concepts, to organize speakers and structure the schedule, and to finally conduct the event. The teacher and the chairman position both taught me to effectively lead people to achieve common goals. Next to social skills, research experience, gained by consulting professional scientists, clearly benefits fellow Applicable Mathematics students. During the MARBLE project, I worked together with several economists from Maastricht University. One requirement of the MARBLE project was to attend to weekly seminars, in which scientists discussed and received feedback on their research progress. These seminars were key to my success in writing the best strategic interaction MARBLE thesis, as I obtained a variety of valuable suggestions on how to improve my own research activities. As I would eagerly share these suggestions, fellow students could clearly profit from my knowledge in this area.
You can find further interesting skills in my resume, which is uploaded for your reference. If you think that I meet your expectations regarding an interesting and attractive student, I would be outstandingly happy to receive an offer for the Master in Applicable Mathematics at the LSE's mathematical department. Thank you for your time and consideration.
