I am a Chinese and applying a graduate school in USA. My weakness is "writing" especially in English. Here is my admission essay. It is very important to me and will impact on my future. Looking for help correct grammar, spelling, punctuation mistakes. Thank you very much.
Prompt: Describe the world you come from--for example, your family, community or school. Tell us about a time when your worldview has informed and/or been challenged by working with children | youth. Reflecting on this and other experiences, how do you hope to grow as a reflective teacher through our program?
I am a native Mandarin (Chinese) speaker from a beautiful island - Taiwan and grew up with my sister and brother in a single-parent family. Ever since I can remember, we did not have much time to see my mother because she worked long hours every day and struggled to pay the minimum due on her bills. Even though, she would find time to read and snuggle with her three children and taught us the value of perseverance, education, and moral fiber. Although I did not have two parents, I was loved and nurtured just as much.
Our life was simple. When we were young, my mother could not give us many material things like toys, video games, allowance or delicious food, to say nothing of sending us to learn instruments, dancing or painting. But, she gave us a free and happy childhood. Most of my classmates went to after-school academies in order to get a better grade even they were not interested in study. My mother could not afford us to attend cram classes which was a good thing to me. Unlike my classmates studying all day long, I just stayed at home with my sister and brother to do homework and play by ourselves. My mother never forced us to study and we could do what we wanted to do like reading, watching TV or playing in the playground. In this period, my sister, brother and I learned how to arrange our free time and take care of ourselves.
Starting from my high school days, I realized that a better education may bring my family a better life which meant a better salary and a better future so I started to study hard so as to go to a good university and graduate school. One day, I heard my neighbor talked to my mother "What does your daughter think? She should not go to graduate school and should go to work to share household expenses instead." I was sad to hear that and thought maybe my neighbor was right. However, my mother still trusted and supported me to go to graduate school. Traditionally, many Chinese parents try to decide their children's future, but my mother who faced the challenge of being a single mother and raising three children is different. "Be brave to do what you really want to do with earnest attitude and be responsible for it." These are the words that my mother always says to us in Chinese and gave me courage to choose my own life. Though my sister and brother do not have high education, we all are satisfied and enjoy who we are and what we have now.
Since I was a little kid I have thought that speaking another language was extremely cool. When I started to learn English officially in junior high school, I was so excited and tried to find foreign pen pals from magazines to practice my English. I sent a lot of letters to foreign countries but they were all no replies. Yet, I did not give up and kept trying. Finally, I got my first foreign pen pal from Norway. I used basic and simple sentence like. "I am a junior high school student. I am from Taiwan. Nice to meet you." to communicate with my pen pal. Through this experience, I was aware that I still could improve my English in many ways with limited budget. I did my best and took any chance to improve my English in my way. First, upon graduation from university, I got a job in an Internet company. I worked hard and saved money for one year. Later, I went to New Zealand to attend an English program for one month. Why New Zealand? Because it was less expensive than America and England. Then, in my second year of graduate school, a visiting professor- Professor Stephen Strombeck - from California came to our department. It was just the time that we had to decide our research topic and advisor. My classmates did not choose Professor Stephen Strombeck because of the language barrier. Instead, I thought It was a once in a lifetime chance to practice English. Therefore, I met with Professor Strombeck and asked him to be my research advisor. Luckily, he said yes. It was amazing that I could do research with a foreign professor without going abroad. After I graduated from graduate school, I worked for a non-profit organization for three years. It was a stable and well-pay job but I knew clearly it was not what I wanted. I wanted to see the world. Then, I quit my job and became a tour leader. One of my jobs is to lead the overseas study group to learn English in USA or Canada during summer vacation. Finally, I saved enough money and went to a community college in Cleveland in USA. I also went to many free English classes nearby my apartment. One of English teacher impressed me. Her name was Maggie and she worked for the Education Department of Cleveland city to teach foreigners English. I was so lucky to be her student. Her teaching was different from other English teachers I ever met. She did not only teach but also enjoy her job. At the same year, many state and local governments of the United States started to promote Chinese language and provide many free Chinese teacher training opportunities. More and more schools provided Chinese language courses as well. Due to Ms. Maggie's teaching enthusiasm and the boom in learning Chinese language, all of sudden, I thought it was time to do some feedback to who want to learn Chinese. At that time, I made my mind that I wanted to be a Chinese language teacher and I would try my best to achieve this goal.
In 2014, I have passed the "Certification Examination for Proficiency in Teaching Chinese as a Second/Foreign Language" and finished a Teaching Chinese as a Second Language training program but I knew it was not enough to make me a professional Chinese language teacher, especially, my target students are foreigners. After spending one year working with Professor Strombeck and several years studying in America, I have noticed differences in education between Western and Asian countries. Meeting different cultures enriches me and changes my perspective on education, particularly education in the United States. Since I want to teach foreigners, it would be better to understand the education from different cultures first.
I therefore would like to pursue a master's degree in education in the United States. Judging by the information I have culled from your website I think your program provides full range of training combining theory with practice. For the purpose of being a reflective teacher, I need more teaching knowledge and practical training. First, by taking your core courses of this program, I will learn what is reflection teaching and the systemic methods of reflection. Then, I will implement what I learn on the Cohort and Co-Teaching Model and get the feedback from my mentor (the cooperating teacher) and students. According to the feedback, I could reflect and adjust my teaching plan. I believe that the "Cohort and Co-Teaching Model" is the most important part in this program. Through your professional courses and the unique Cohort and Co-Teaching Model, I could learn how to reflect on my own practices to find better ways of teaching. I believe that, after I complete my advanced training in your program, I will be a much more professional and reflective teacher.
Prompt: Describe the world you come from--for example, your family, community or school. Tell us about a time when your worldview has informed and/or been challenged by working with children | youth. Reflecting on this and other experiences, how do you hope to grow as a reflective teacher through our program?
Graduate admission essay
I am a native Mandarin (Chinese) speaker from a beautiful island - Taiwan and grew up with my sister and brother in a single-parent family. Ever since I can remember, we did not have much time to see my mother because she worked long hours every day and struggled to pay the minimum due on her bills. Even though, she would find time to read and snuggle with her three children and taught us the value of perseverance, education, and moral fiber. Although I did not have two parents, I was loved and nurtured just as much.
Our life was simple. When we were young, my mother could not give us many material things like toys, video games, allowance or delicious food, to say nothing of sending us to learn instruments, dancing or painting. But, she gave us a free and happy childhood. Most of my classmates went to after-school academies in order to get a better grade even they were not interested in study. My mother could not afford us to attend cram classes which was a good thing to me. Unlike my classmates studying all day long, I just stayed at home with my sister and brother to do homework and play by ourselves. My mother never forced us to study and we could do what we wanted to do like reading, watching TV or playing in the playground. In this period, my sister, brother and I learned how to arrange our free time and take care of ourselves.
Starting from my high school days, I realized that a better education may bring my family a better life which meant a better salary and a better future so I started to study hard so as to go to a good university and graduate school. One day, I heard my neighbor talked to my mother "What does your daughter think? She should not go to graduate school and should go to work to share household expenses instead." I was sad to hear that and thought maybe my neighbor was right. However, my mother still trusted and supported me to go to graduate school. Traditionally, many Chinese parents try to decide their children's future, but my mother who faced the challenge of being a single mother and raising three children is different. "Be brave to do what you really want to do with earnest attitude and be responsible for it." These are the words that my mother always says to us in Chinese and gave me courage to choose my own life. Though my sister and brother do not have high education, we all are satisfied and enjoy who we are and what we have now.
Since I was a little kid I have thought that speaking another language was extremely cool. When I started to learn English officially in junior high school, I was so excited and tried to find foreign pen pals from magazines to practice my English. I sent a lot of letters to foreign countries but they were all no replies. Yet, I did not give up and kept trying. Finally, I got my first foreign pen pal from Norway. I used basic and simple sentence like. "I am a junior high school student. I am from Taiwan. Nice to meet you." to communicate with my pen pal. Through this experience, I was aware that I still could improve my English in many ways with limited budget. I did my best and took any chance to improve my English in my way. First, upon graduation from university, I got a job in an Internet company. I worked hard and saved money for one year. Later, I went to New Zealand to attend an English program for one month. Why New Zealand? Because it was less expensive than America and England. Then, in my second year of graduate school, a visiting professor- Professor Stephen Strombeck - from California came to our department. It was just the time that we had to decide our research topic and advisor. My classmates did not choose Professor Stephen Strombeck because of the language barrier. Instead, I thought It was a once in a lifetime chance to practice English. Therefore, I met with Professor Strombeck and asked him to be my research advisor. Luckily, he said yes. It was amazing that I could do research with a foreign professor without going abroad. After I graduated from graduate school, I worked for a non-profit organization for three years. It was a stable and well-pay job but I knew clearly it was not what I wanted. I wanted to see the world. Then, I quit my job and became a tour leader. One of my jobs is to lead the overseas study group to learn English in USA or Canada during summer vacation. Finally, I saved enough money and went to a community college in Cleveland in USA. I also went to many free English classes nearby my apartment. One of English teacher impressed me. Her name was Maggie and she worked for the Education Department of Cleveland city to teach foreigners English. I was so lucky to be her student. Her teaching was different from other English teachers I ever met. She did not only teach but also enjoy her job. At the same year, many state and local governments of the United States started to promote Chinese language and provide many free Chinese teacher training opportunities. More and more schools provided Chinese language courses as well. Due to Ms. Maggie's teaching enthusiasm and the boom in learning Chinese language, all of sudden, I thought it was time to do some feedback to who want to learn Chinese. At that time, I made my mind that I wanted to be a Chinese language teacher and I would try my best to achieve this goal.
In 2014, I have passed the "Certification Examination for Proficiency in Teaching Chinese as a Second/Foreign Language" and finished a Teaching Chinese as a Second Language training program but I knew it was not enough to make me a professional Chinese language teacher, especially, my target students are foreigners. After spending one year working with Professor Strombeck and several years studying in America, I have noticed differences in education between Western and Asian countries. Meeting different cultures enriches me and changes my perspective on education, particularly education in the United States. Since I want to teach foreigners, it would be better to understand the education from different cultures first.
I therefore would like to pursue a master's degree in education in the United States. Judging by the information I have culled from your website I think your program provides full range of training combining theory with practice. For the purpose of being a reflective teacher, I need more teaching knowledge and practical training. First, by taking your core courses of this program, I will learn what is reflection teaching and the systemic methods of reflection. Then, I will implement what I learn on the Cohort and Co-Teaching Model and get the feedback from my mentor (the cooperating teacher) and students. According to the feedback, I could reflect and adjust my teaching plan. I believe that the "Cohort and Co-Teaching Model" is the most important part in this program. Through your professional courses and the unique Cohort and Co-Teaching Model, I could learn how to reflect on my own practices to find better ways of teaching. I believe that, after I complete my advanced training in your program, I will be a much more professional and reflective teacher.
