"Struggle" -Non Traditional Graduate Student writing a personal statement SLP Program

Hi my name is China I need tips on writing a strong, concise personal statement. Here is my personal statement.

NON TRADITIONAL STUDENTS REVISED PERSONAL STATEMENT FOR GRADUATE SCHOOL. Help please

I became interested in field of Communication Disorders fall semester 2004. I met with an advisor and I stated to her that I wanted to change my major after chemistry course. I express my interests and she asks me to research the profession Speech Language Pathology/Audiology and other majors. I became very curious and I took prerequisites course. I was accepted in the program, but declared my sequence as Audiology. My ending grade point was not strong enough for the graduate school, the because of distractions and immaturity. What make me a good candidate is my age, leadership, life /work force experiences.

My age makes me a good candidate because my maturity level has changed from my undergraduate experience. During that time, that I had many distractions the causes me to lack in my grades and study skills. However, I am mature and a single mother I know how important for me focused and manage my study time and personal time. Organizing and preparing by reading the materials before the 1st day of class and communicating with former students that have taken the course to get a feel for the course. My independent/leadership skill makes me a good candidate because I continued to educate and surround myself with professional and peers in the field for advice. I joined professional organization National Black Association of Speech Language Pathology & Hearing (NBASLH). I took graduate courses in CDIS to prove that I am capable of preforming as graduate level and read professional journals on Auditory Processing Disorders (APD), Autism, and Bilingualism. I also hired a tutor the GRE Test so I can get better score.

My work and volunteer experiences has taught me to be organized with appointments, s.o.a.p. notes, and other documentations. Follow up with clients via emails and telephone calls. Using binders and folders and protecting client's information and turning in weekly s.o.a.p. notes in the timely manner. My oral/written progress reports have become better concise and detailed. I always met with my supervisor for individual meeting. I she gave me constructive criticism and praises. I took the constrictive criticism and independently practice writing my notes better and research the clients' diagnoses. I would do mock therapy sessions with my coworkers so I can get an idea for different approaches and techniques. I had a few co- therapy sessions with other therapists; we collaborated and discussed child progress and recommendations for the clients. I have visible successful stories with children with no limited speech or language.

Career objectives are to obtain my master's degree in Speech Language Pathology and my PH.D. I would like to conduct research in my topics of interest. Overall, my career interests can in graduate school. I have the compassion for helping others communicate because it is a great feeling to aid, correct, facilitate, and provide techniques to the parents and child.

To conclude was make a stronger candidate because of my age, independent skills, and life and workforce experiences. Even though, I was younger in age and that hindered my grade point average I feel that I am more focused and prepared graduate school and ready to complete master's degree and career interests. I continue persevere to educate in the field to show my interest in Communication Disorders.

"If there is no struggle, if there is no progress." -Fredrick Douglas. ----I think you have one too many "if"... also, I can think of a lot of examples of progres without strugle! That is the best kind of progress. :-)

to the graduate communicative disorders department. ---if this is a department, it should be capitalized, right? Is it capitalized in the school's literature and website?

Since graduation I have struggled educationally and finically financially with...

Try to eliminate unnecessary words: the past mistakes that I have made during in the undergraduate program communicative disorders, repaying loans that hindered me while trying to receive aid for

I like this: to rise above the confusion

If a specific subject is not my best subject, I should make it my priority!

I want to know more about what you have been READING lately about communicative disorders.

She gave me a month to make a decision. and at this time I had no clue that the field existed. It is not good to highlight your lack of preparedness.

You write very well! Add some sentences to show that you have been reading professional journal articles and books about this specialization. :-)

...the passing of my grandparents

...lack of support, and not being accepted to a program for communicative disorders.

...time applying to thegraduate program communicative disorders department .

Since graduation, I have struggled educationally and financially with the past mistakes I have made during in the undergraduate program for communicative disorders; repaying loans that hinderedmy receiving financial aid for school; and being unable to secure employment.

After graduation, I still continue my education, and surrounding myself with other communicative disorders professionals.I have also taken graduate classes as an undeclared student to prove that I am capable of doing graduate level work, and I volunteer as an observer in various private practice clinics.

I realized that I have compassion to help people communicate effectively, and have persevered through my past obstaclesto hopefully complete my objectives in becoming a Speech Language Pathologist.

Unfortunately, I only had time to work on the first paragraph. It's mainly just nit-picky stuff that my English teacher always points out in my papers. Hopefully that helped :)

Thank you you both. I have a question to ask does my essay include Crital thinking, professional expiences, independent learning, written and oral communcation? if it not please let me know what i can do to incorprate that!

The most important thing is to use these words. For example, you can begin a paragraph by saying:
I developed my critical thinking skills when I ...

Start another paragraph by saying:
My professional experience includes __________, ________, and _______________.

Do you see what I mean? use the same words they used, and that will ensure that they notice that you are answering correctly.

I think you did cover these, but you should SHOW the reader that you covered all of them. For example, use the term "oral communication" in your essay. Use the term "written communication" in your essay.

:-)