Writing Feedback / Is it appropriate to use of animals for human benefits? [2]

Some people think that it is appropriate to use animals for human benefit, while for others it can not be justified.
Discuss both sides and give your opinion

To some extent, some people think that it is appropriate to utilize animals for human's well-being. Crossing to the other side, the rest of the people think that it is unfair to use animals for the sake of human. From my perspective, using the animals for human's purpose is acceptable as long as we treat them fairly.

For those people who are against the use of animals, their sole reason is equality. They strongly argue that animals' lives have the same worth of those of humans', and that we are all created by God. Hence, it cannot be justified to treat them as if they have to obey humans. They believe that animals should have their own freedom as much as humans do, and thus, not to become humans' slave.

As for others, they mostly point out the mutual benefits which emerge from their relationships. The role of animals can make humans' daily routine much easier, such as horses for transportation, dogs for hunting, or buffalos for farming. Likewise, animals get a place to live with minimum risk of being hunted by other animals, they get food regularly and taken care by humans.

However, I extremely believe that mutual benefit may arise from the relationships of animals and humans under some circumstances. Indeed, humans must treat them fairly and take care of them. For example, if the animal is sick, human should not force it to keep on working. In addition to this, humans must feed them well and give them a proper place to live. Therefore, the harmony between animals and humans can become true.

All in all, I truly believe that is it appropriate if humans use animals for their purpose as long as they are treated in a good way. It is imperative to keep in mind that even though we are using animals, we both have the same worth of lives.

(Dear Writers, this is my first attempt to complete IELTS Writing Task 2 during practice. Kindly need your feedback to improve my writing in the future. Thank you!)

Writing Feedback / TV Programmes Watched in Australia - women prefer to watch reality shows more than game shows [NEW]

The chart below show the number and genres of TV programmes watched by men and women and four different age groups in Australia

The bar chart gives information about the percentage of people who watch reality and game shows in television. These people are categorized based on their genders and age. The most significant fact to emerge are females prefer to watch reality shows than game shows, and vice versa for males. On the other hand, people in the group age of 45 and above has the biggest proportion in both shows.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, there is approximately two folds of females who are keen on watching reality shows from those of males. In contrary, males who choose to game shows over reality shows are slightly having a larger proportion than females, with only below one twenty of gap.

While in the categorization of age, both reality and games shows mostly preferred by people whose aged 45 and beyond at approximately 70% of proportion in all shows. Reality shows witnessed people aged 35-44 as their second largest proportion at around two third. As for game shows, its following largest audience is the age group of 16-24 at just over half the proportion.

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Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 1 Simulation: World Population by Region, 1900 and 2000 [6]

The pie charts below give information about world population in 1900 and 2000.

The chart shows the percentage of the world population in each region in 1990 and 2000. The most significant facts to emerge are both changes in population proportion and the area in several regions over the two periods.

Moving to a more detailed analysis, 1900 saw a total of people who inhabited the world at 1.6 billion. The biggest population in the world in this year was Asia at approximately a third of total proportion. Following this, Europe, which included Russia, became the second largest region inhabited by human with a quarter of total population. Lastly, the other regions (North America, Africa, Latin America and others) came out as the least inhabited ones with about half a fifth of Europe's population.

Next, Asia Pacific region, which had additional area of former Soviet Asia, still had the biggest proportion among others with more than half of total world population during the period 2000. In contrast, the other regions only had 3-14% of total world inhabitants within the timeframe. Also in this period, there were two changes in the region categorization; they were Middle East and North Africa as an additional region in the world, and Caribbean became a part of Latin America.

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