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Posts by scgoalie00
Name: Katie Thompson
Joined: Dec 28, 2016
Last Post: Dec 31, 2016
Threads: 3
Posts: 2  
From: United States
School: Westmont

Displayed posts: 5
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scgoalie00   
Dec 28, 2016
Undergraduate / Many "how" or "why" monumental questions in my mind. University of Pennsylvania essay [3]

Is this tOo BORING and General?
I would love any criticism or advice!!

How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania? Please answer this question given the specific undergraduate school to which you are applying. (400-650 words)

"how" or a "why" questions in my life



Like most powerful questions, the most monumental in my life begin with a "how" or a "why." What began as adorable interest (like asking "Why don't they just say they love each other?" while watching Oklahoma at age four) morphed into serious inquiry (like asking "How can chemicals make them love each other?" while watching The Notebook at age twelve). Growing up, my questions revolved around how to help others and understand myself. As a teenager, noticing myriad somber faces of my peers led me to ask how I can utilize positivity to improve the lives of those around me. Additionally, seeing how my twin sister and I began to branch off in our hobbies and goals made me pester my parents about why I formed different interests from her. In my quest to explore those wonders of the world, I stumbled upon psychology, a field that promises to satiate my hungering curiosity.

Although I take pride in my grades, tenacity, and relentless hard work, I am most proud of the trust my friends instill in me. Even with my own struggles, I wear a mask of positivity and optimism, in hopes that it becomes contagious. From reading essays for my friends to offering advice and a safe space to a friend who felt completely exhausted with his life, I promote the wellbeing of others through positivity. To serve others most successfully, I have become engrossed in positive psychology. At University of Pennsylvania, the opportunity to work with Martin Seligman in the Positive Psychology Center remains paramount (I even own his book, Learned Optimism). Although he bears accomplishments aplenty, Seligman most captivated me with Character Strengths and Virtues; akin to Seligman, I prefer to focus on not what goes wrong and how to fix it, but what goes right and how to achieve it. At University of Pennsylvania, I hope to learn how to better ameliorate others.

While I constantly champion for helping others, I also possess a need for understanding myself. In psychology, I discovered the ever-present nature vs. nurture debate in hopes that it would answer why I differ from my twin sister. Heritability high, our nurture remains nearly identical, so why do our interests differ exponentially? As it turns out, a plethora of theories and branches of psychology explain our differences: behavioral psychology, cognitive psychology, social psychology, developmental psychology, and more. Strikingly, it is an aggregate of these fields of psychology that explains the differences of my twin and me. Most interested in developmental and cognitive psychology, I strive to work with assistant professor Allyson Mackey and professor Sara Jaffee. Mackey's research in brain plasticity of developing children renders me intrigued; perhaps it was the difference in our development-our brain plasticity-that set my twin and me apart. Moreover, Jaffee's research in gene-environment interplay resonates with me; perhaps it was how our genes-similar, but not identical-fared in our equally similar, but not identical environments that separates me from my twin. [I would even love to connect with my uncle/cousin, Phil Nichols, to understand critical reasoning] At University of Pennsylvania, I hope to learn how to better understand myself.

No longer can my parents answer my now brow-furrowing questions, but with the resources, faculty, and spirit at University of Pennsylvania, I can. No matter what, I will never cease my curiosity. Hopefully with University of Pennsylvania on the horizon, I can continue asking and answering "how" and "why."
scgoalie00   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Tetris blocks - relax sometimes to keep your mind ready. U Penn supplemental essay - engineering. [5]

@khatanbuuveibold

Another problem that constantly annoys me is how my glasses get all foggy whenever I walk into a building in winter time.

The "I" between whenever and walk is missing. That's just a missing word, but other than that, I'd expand more on UPenn and how you actually attended a program there. Maybe combining your intro paragraphs about problems you've solved (which, don't get me wrong, are important and impressive to keep) would give you space to talk about Penn more.
scgoalie00   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Sitting on the backseat of the car - Harvard Supplement. [3]

@khatanbuuveibold

By the virtue of being a teacher's child, for the last 11 years, I have gone to school in the back seat of my father's car every morning of the school year.

^^flows better to me

Don't worry too much about being Harvard specific if it's not asking why Harvard. I like the flow and consistency also. One thing I might add is how you're more than a gamer, a programmer, a football fan, a teacher's child, a champion, an inventor, and a movie geek. Clearly, you're constantly changing and evolving, so you should add something about that too. Looking good though!
scgoalie00   
Dec 29, 2016
Undergraduate / Untitled - My Common App - Not one talent, background, or identity defines me. [4]

I would appreciate any criticism and advice!! Thanks!

Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. (650 words)

Untitled



Not one talent, background, or identity defines me. Instead, I am Katie, the aggregate of my experiences and titles- an enamored aunt, tireless editor, supportive captain, and solicitous sister.

The aunt of Lily Rose Thompson, I've learned to appreciate the little things in life. Every seemingly small, insignificant object-from the People magazine subscription paper becoming Lily's favorite toy, to the stand-up mirror containing another entranced Lily-can bring exponential joy. Who knew spinning her in an office chair could result in endless giggles? Who knew that catching her after mad dashes to the fireplace could erupt into a game? Who knew that one little girl could change my life forever? Providing her endless affection, I am proud to bear the title of aunt.

As an editor of The Shield, my school's newspaper, I thoughtfully write 3-5 stories and craft 1-2 pages per issue (with 9 issues a year), sell ads and subscriptions (I have subscribers in Norway!), send 28 pages to the printer, edit and take home 4-6 pages each day, and ceaselessly stop my own work to aid others. With stories ranging from "Slaying the Decaying," where I explain why I'm beneficial in a zombie apocalypse, to "Bora Bora Ain't Bora Borin'," where I (shockingly) explain why Bora Bora isn't boring, I instill joy to my readers worldwide. Additionally, I spend frequent hours-often working during study hall and lunch-perfecting my page(s) and sending final pages to the printer. Further, I edit 4-6 pages every day, scoping for mistakes to ensure an error-free paper. For the students that will carry on my legacy, I strive to welcome and inspire with my three years of journalism and Photoshop knowledge. Although I am proud of my aforementioned responsibilities and skills, the most important task I accomplish is creating a newspaper and environment of joy. With a remarkable Shield in hand, I am proud to bear the title of editor.

After playing on varsity for four years, I am now a varsity soccer captain. My freshman year, I let self-doubt control me; as a result, I hardly played a game. That year, tearing the MPFL in my knee and requiring surgery put me out of soccer for myriad months. But you know what they say: only time can heal a broken heart- or kneecap, in my situation. Ultimately, I discovered that nothing could replace the dinners with my fellow teammates, the pride glimmering in our eyes as we won together, or the dejected tears we shed as we lost together. Finally, it clicked: my team was my family. Thus, the following year saw a more confident, fearless me; as a result, I played every game. With me leading in goal last year, my team won first in league. The rock, anchor, and mascot of my team, I am proud to bear the title of captain.

While my newborn brother shrieked in pain at the doctor's, my four-year-old self tugged on my mom's sleeve, wide-eyed with woe. "Can I take his shots for him?" I asked willingly, naively hoping to alleviate his pain. Similarly, in fourth grade when a boy who liked me began bullying Sarah, my twin, I promised him a week of dating and two twinkies to behave nicely. Now, years later, I would still readily sacrifice myself for my siblings. As college approaches, Sarah and I face a tough truth: separation. Whereas always Sarah galvanizes me to loosen up and live, I challenge her to succeed and support her when she does not. Because our love runs deep, I know that distance will not abate our solace. Amongst our fighting, yelling, caring, and protecting, I am proud to bear the title of sister.

An aunt, editor, captain, sister- my whole is greater than the sum of my parts. Although I proudly bear my titles, I still have much to learn, grow, and become. Unrestrained, I will forever be untitled.
scgoalie00   
Dec 31, 2016
Undergraduate / Five days which taught me a lot. Cornell ILR program-- Why Cornell?? [2]

Does this address Cornell ILR enough, or should I take out other sentences to be more specific? I'm pretty tight on the 500 word limit.

Tell us about your intellectual interests, how they sprung from your course, service, work or life experiences, and what makes them exciting to you. Describe how ILR is the right school for you to pursue these interests. (500 w0rds)

Five days of life experience



Oddly enough, a week surrounded by seventh graders taught me much about life. As a counselor at Walden West science camp-though I kept nature unscathed-I unearthed the value of understanding history, sociology, psychology, law, and passion in creating a better camp and world.

Day 1: Immediately, I spotted two troublesome-looking camp counselors: Atmosphere and Tree, Atmosphere sporting buzzed hair and baggy clothes; Tree, long braids and a brazen demeanor. Recognizing that their backgrounds failed to mirror mine, I avoided them. Later, upon entering a cabin, they clamored,

"Stinky, crinkly socks on the CEILING?!" Curious about the commotion, I had my first conversation with them (albeit, one about socks), realizing then that they were among the most approachable people I'd met. Scolding myself for my initial, inappropriate prejudice, I saw them in an unobstructed light. Through ILR history and sociology focuses, I hope to understand and unearth how and why prejudice began in order to prevent it in the future.

Day 2: Reluctant to become co-cabin leaders with an eccentric stranger, I thought, How awkward will this week-
"Hi! I'm Igneous and I'm soooo glad we're co-cabin leaders!" Igneous interrupted, alleviating my concerns. Whether throwing socks on the (oddly sticky) cabin walls or teaching me Cheetah Girls dances, Igneous proved herself the beacon of carefree positivity. When Tortuga, a camper, grew homesick, Igneous cheered him up with unrelenting optimism. As Tortuga's smile returned, I understood the power of positivity. Through ILR's psychology focus-specifically positive and humanistic-I hope to understand and adopt Igneous's optimism.

Day 3: On a hike, I noticed Fauna, a camper, wearing Uggs. Concerned for her comfort, I proposed, "Let's do a shoe swap- I'll trade you." Relief coloring her face, she gladly accepted; the pain in my feet paled in comparison to the joy of Fauna. Recognizing how I wish to serve others every day, my aspiration to become a trial attorney was born. Through ILR's law focus, I hope to continue a path toward my prospective career.

Day 4: "I wanna double cheeseburger, hold the lettuce..." spat the usually timid Night Owl, an unforeseen rapper. Embarrassed, she showcased her impressive talent to me alone. However, with my encouragement, she unleashed her passion, rapping to the entirety of camp and receiving a standing ovation. Even amidst learning, I see the importance of trust, bonds, and passion. Although ILR offers rigorous and rewarding academics, it also hosts a plethora of clubs that channel both academics and lively passion. To encourage and promote others, the opportunity to join the Women's Caucus and ILR Ambassadors remains paramount.

Day 5: As camp drew to a close, I promised to remember how Atmosphere and Tree taught me to eschew prejudice; Igneous, to utilize positivity; Fauna, to put others first; and Night Owl, to pursue passion. Though I sprouted higher than the surrounding sequoias through the lessons I learned, my growing is incomplete. Through ILR's unique mix of history, sociology, psychology, law, and passion, I will sharpen my tools to create a better tomorrow.
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