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Posts by coheny [Suspended]
Name: Hyewon Jung
Joined: Feb 10, 2021
Last Post: Feb 13, 2021
Threads: 1
Posts: 4  
From: Germany

Displayed posts: 5
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coheny   
Feb 10, 2021
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing task - study the science of food - requirement of advice [4]

Task:
Some people think students should study the science of food and how to prepare it. Others think that school time should be used in learning important subjects.

Discuss both views and give your opinion



Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

My answer:
Some people argue that students learn the knowledge of food and cooking, while others assert that students study more crucial subjects instead of learning that. This essay will discuss both opinions and I will explain why learning the science of food is essential to students.

Firstly, some people insist that students can learn how to prepare food by parents or other methods. They rather emphasize how important it is that learning math or language in school. These subjects are the basic module of the main examination for evaluating students' grades. In fact, lessons of elementary schools or middle school consist of math or literature or history by and large.

However, I believe that there are more persuasive counter-arguments. By learning the science of food and obtaining the skill of cooking, students can choose healthier meals or ingredients. It will let them know what is good and what is bad. Even more, many scientists have reported that when children are exposed to a variety of food in young age, they can enjoy the flavor of food more. Furthermore, learning the science of food and how to prepare it can also drive motivation to learn about other related subjects.

In conclusion, school time should include enough lessons in terms of the science of food or how to organize it. It makes wide knowledge up, not only the science but also agriculture or history. What eating to humans is an inevitable matter of life. Hence, teachers should play a role of leading their students to explore the science of food.
coheny   
Feb 13, 2021
Writing Feedback / IELTS writing task 2: Each year, a number of languages fade into extinction [4]

@LadyOfClockwork
As adding one comment in terms of Holt's comment, I can see there is one possibility to correct. For example, write about a scenario when the media only gives news of translated version, it could be convenient, but probably it makes a loss of accurate meaning. That was my idea.
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