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Posts by diegorivero412
Joined: Oct 13, 2011
Last Post: Nov 30, 2011
Threads: 2
Posts: 5  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 7
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diegorivero412   
Oct 13, 2011
Undergraduate / 'most of my life in Colombia' - a significant experience, achievement, risk [3]

** Please help me with any useful feedback, as well as how to shorten it to 500 words.**

It can be said that being in the same environment will never allow you to see the true realities of it, since all you face is a specific reality that may be far away from the truth. Living most of my life in Colombia up until I was seven years old, I never paid much attention to the poverty and hardships the country was facing. It was not until I came to the United States that I was able to contrast the different living conditions that the average person in America had compared to the living conditions of the common people of Colombia. Transportation, proper education, and accessible food were standard commodities in the United States, while in some parts of Colombia, most of these things were unheard of, and often considered a "luxury". This notable difference, of two countries considered part of "America" but yet so different, inspired me to try to make a change and provide support for those struggling in Colombia. I began my journey by associating myself with "Misión Child" (Mission Child), a nonprofit organization that reaches out to kids in poverty in South America. By starting fundraisers to collect money for the building of a new school in a poverty-stricken village in Bogotá, Colombia, I was able to start what I considered one of attempts to give back to my country. Although the program opened my eyes to several problems children of Colombia were facing, education was one factor, which stood out as the most important and lacking element affecting their development. Seeing these kids who aren't even given the opportunity to obtain an education, made me feel embarrassed and remorseful for sometimes taking education for granted. What mostly motivated me to participate and affiliate myself with Mission Child was the absolute vindication that in order to transform the future of a child, we must offer better living conditions that allow the full development of a child to an adult that is mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually healthy. If they don't have their basic needs met, how can they achieve their long-term personal and professional goals in the future?. This leads to a better tomorrow for all of society and humanity. I realized that in order to have a positive impact on the world, I must accept the challenge of investing in the education of children, who are ultimately the future leaders of the world. The program made great progress as a respectable learning institution was established in the village, providing not only a proper education but also essential needs and food for the children. After seeing the great results that "Mission Child" obtained, pushed me to initiate my own non-profit organization known as "Give Back". This organization's goal was to supply orphanages with essential supplies and necessities like toothpaste, toothbrushes, shampoo, deodorant, etc. By integrating my school as well as my community, I was able to expand the organization throughout the city of Miami, by speaking at my school's chapel, neighborhood churches, and even neighbors. Thanks to the support from my school and community, "Give Back" was able to collect several items to be delivered to "His House Children's Home"; a private, non-profit organization helping children and families through adoption and foster services. By participating in "Misión Child" and organizing "Give Back" I've developed a growing sense for community awareness and outreach. As I look back, I also see that none of these opportunities would have occurred if I had not moved to the United States. I know that college will feel like a completely different place than high school, but I welcome this difference with open arms knowing that change can bring out new opportunities and aspects in life. Having said this, I recognize that these opportunities have established wonderful principles that I could bring to the college campus, such as community awareness and outreach programs.
diegorivero412   
Nov 27, 2011
Undergraduate / My many influences. UT essay [2]

Looking back on my life there have been
They've humbled me and made me INTO THE PERSON I AM today
diegorivero412   
Nov 27, 2011
Undergraduate / 'Coming to the United States with nothing' - THE WORLD YOU COME FROM [3]

Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Please provide any helpful feedback, thank you!

Hard work and perseverance are two words that have been implemented in my life ever since I was a child. Coming to the United States with nothing more than a suitcase of clothing, a Spanish to English thesaurus and a hundred dollar bill, my family and I didn't necessarily reach the United States with many commodities. The different culture, language, and city size overpowered us with confusion and nostalgia. Coming from Cali, a small city in Colombia, Miami felt much too large and open. Where the people in Cali were very close to one another, I felt the people of Miami barely knew one another and lacked the sense of camaraderie. It wasn't until I began 4th grade that I began to interact with American children my age. However the language barrier between most children and I, kept us separated.

How then was I supposed to advance in this new country, when what seemed like the Berlin wall kept me from others. I knew that unless I began pounding into this "wall" by practicing my English, I would never surpass this obstacle. At my house I saw that my parents faced similar obstacles, as jobs were not easily obtainable without English. Despite our difficulties however, we were determined to move forward and overcome the first challege this new country had thrown at us. While most kids went out to play kick ball during recess, I stayed in class practicing nouns and verbs with my English teacher. When we were allowed to go to the library, instead of playing game at the computers I choose to try reading short stories. It was all this sacrifice that helped me finally grasp this new language.

Finally being able to interact with children my age in English was one of the greatest accomplishments of my life. It felt as if after all my hard work and small poundings at the "wall" I had finally been able to bring it down. I now realize that if I had never taken that extra step to overcome the language barrier, I would have never progressed in this new country. Success never comes to those who take no initiative and become too comfortable. One must always be hungry to learn and tear down obstacles that come into ones life.

Seeing that I was able to bring down an obstacle many people have fallen to, has taught me that there is nothing I cant accomplish through hard work and perserverance. Just as when I was in 4th grade now as a senior a new "wall" encircles me. Since neither my father nor mother were able to graduate from college due to the conditions we came to the United States in, I plan on being the first generation graduate from college. I know college will bring about new obstacles and challenges but I also know that when I was younger I overcame an obstacle as big as the Berlin wall.
diegorivero412   
Nov 30, 2011
Writing Feedback / A stereotype about America essay [3]

This is a perfect example of them not wanting diversity AS change.
- you put are, i think you meant to put as

overall awesome essay
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