BillyIon
Dec 29, 2011
Undergraduate / Common App Essay *Teach me how to rap* [7]
I've never really lived a very stable life, plagued with family issues and my father's constant unemployment. But it was this instability that allowed me to explore the more diverse aspects of life. A few years ago, my father found a new job in a different state, but I stayed behind to finish the school year. A devout Latter Day Saints family opted to take me in for the following months. Even though I wasn't religious, I would still go to the five hour long sermons with them every Sunday and wake up at 5 AM on weekdays to go to bible school because I was curious to see the lifestyles of people I rarely associate with. One day at church, the bishop asked if I, along with other youths my age, would be interested in tutoring inner city kids. It was an opportunity to see another culture of life away from the congenial suburbs, so I said yes.
The student I had was a freshman named Tyrone. Ostensibly, he looked like the stereotypical "black man from the hood." He sagged his pants, carried a basketball, and even wore a comb in his afro. His personality however, was anything but. He was focused and organized, and he was patient and confident. One peculiar feature was that he carried a big blue notebook under his arms even though he had a backpack. When I asked him what was written in it, he told me it was his book of raps. When I asked him what he rapped about, he told me his perspectives on the world. I, as a suburbanite, have only heard "rap" music on radio and at parties, but when I listened to his lyrics, I saw a gateway to another culture. Through his lyrics, he told a story of his ambitions and struggles, the inequities of his poverty, and the power of his will.
As first generation immigrants, my father was not culturally open. I grew up in an environment where I was expected to humbly bow down my head, study, go to college, get a job, and then die. But Tyrone expressed emotions, themes, and feelings that are ineffable. The pleasure to create a work to touch the feelings of other is art; this is a taste of humanities. Art adds to one's understanding of self and doing so helps one to live in peace. I wanted to meet life at the intersection of science and humanities. So I said to him "teach me how to rap."
Ok its kinda short ATM at 460 words, and I haven't really concluded it.
But what do you think???
Do you think my 3rd paragraph isn't that well developed?
Do you think the topic is cheesy?
I'm applying to the Ivies (i know right -.-)
THANKS!!!!
I've never really lived a very stable life, plagued with family issues and my father's constant unemployment. But it was this instability that allowed me to explore the more diverse aspects of life. A few years ago, my father found a new job in a different state, but I stayed behind to finish the school year. A devout Latter Day Saints family opted to take me in for the following months. Even though I wasn't religious, I would still go to the five hour long sermons with them every Sunday and wake up at 5 AM on weekdays to go to bible school because I was curious to see the lifestyles of people I rarely associate with. One day at church, the bishop asked if I, along with other youths my age, would be interested in tutoring inner city kids. It was an opportunity to see another culture of life away from the congenial suburbs, so I said yes.
The student I had was a freshman named Tyrone. Ostensibly, he looked like the stereotypical "black man from the hood." He sagged his pants, carried a basketball, and even wore a comb in his afro. His personality however, was anything but. He was focused and organized, and he was patient and confident. One peculiar feature was that he carried a big blue notebook under his arms even though he had a backpack. When I asked him what was written in it, he told me it was his book of raps. When I asked him what he rapped about, he told me his perspectives on the world. I, as a suburbanite, have only heard "rap" music on radio and at parties, but when I listened to his lyrics, I saw a gateway to another culture. Through his lyrics, he told a story of his ambitions and struggles, the inequities of his poverty, and the power of his will.
As first generation immigrants, my father was not culturally open. I grew up in an environment where I was expected to humbly bow down my head, study, go to college, get a job, and then die. But Tyrone expressed emotions, themes, and feelings that are ineffable. The pleasure to create a work to touch the feelings of other is art; this is a taste of humanities. Art adds to one's understanding of self and doing so helps one to live in peace. I wanted to meet life at the intersection of science and humanities. So I said to him "teach me how to rap."
Ok its kinda short ATM at 460 words, and I haven't really concluded it.
But what do you think???
Do you think my 3rd paragraph isn't that well developed?
Do you think the topic is cheesy?
I'm applying to the Ivies (i know right -.-)
THANKS!!!!