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Posts by stacy422
Name: Shih Tang
Joined: Sep 5, 2018
Last Post: Sep 13, 2018
Threads: 3
Posts: 4  
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From: Taiwan
School: National Taiwan University

Displayed posts: 7
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stacy422   
Sep 13, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2 - Discussion on giving financial or practical aid to developing countries [3]

the type of support needed the most



Developing countries require help offered by international organizations to ensure healthy and sustainable development. Some people think that financial help is important. Others believe that practical aid and advice is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Concerning aid provided by organizations to help developing countries achieve sustainable development. some people believe financial support is more important than practical help and advice while others hold the opposite opinion. In this essay, I will discuss both views and elaborate on my thoughts.

To provide money is crucial to development in various ways. To start with, giving money means the country has self-determination rights on how they want to improve, regarding infrastructure, education and so much more. In addition, money instead of free objects and stimulate the domestic economy, leading to a healthy market mechanism.

On the other hand, giving out practical help such as food, skill training, and medical service is also important. Firstly, if one nation is underdeveloped, there might be things that could not be bought, for instance, medical equipment. Secondly, empowering people through various kinds of training can make people have the ability to change his/her life on his own. In fact, when people only receive can and free stuff, welfare dependency might be acquired, depriving one's awareness to work form himself.

Taking both views into consideration, I believe both ways of helping are equally vital. How these two methods put into practice for the benefit of the nation is a difficult but certainly significant issue every international organization should constantly think about.

In conclusion, there are many reasons why people argue that whether financial or practical help is more important while I believe they are crucial in the same way.
stacy422   
Sep 13, 2018
Writing Feedback / Task 2: Opinion about video games - more problems than benefits [7]

IELTS

to release - to relieve stress
which highly likely lead to - which is likely to
Equally importantly, video games provided harmful ... who are frequently exposed to them

You have good points in your essay. Just be careful of grammar and some spelling errors!
stacy422   
Sep 13, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2-Discuss Main Aim For University Educaiton [3]

Ryan, I'm also preparing IELTS test. I also made the mistake of not discussing both views in this kind of article. However, I think your expression is pretty clear and that you could definitely get a good score after making some changes. Good luck!

studying in university enables undergraduates
Be careful of small grammar mistakes!!!
stacy422   
Sep 9, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 - opinions on transportation improvements [3]

MORE FUNDS FOR RAILWAYS OR FOR PUBLIC ROADS?



In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


In a few countries, there has been a discussion on whether they should invest money on building new high-speed-trains or rather spend money on currents public transportation system to develop better functions. Overall. I believe the priority should be upgrading transportations that we already have. However, I think the answer depends on different situations of different countries.

Without a doubt, there are both advantages and disadvantages of constructing a new fast train system. First of all, it can considerably reduce the time of commuting between cities, which can bring up the development of various cities, resulting in the economic performance of one country. For example, in my country Taiwan, our High Speed Railway (HSR) system was launched about 15 years ago. It had lowered the cost of traveling between cities, and benefitted those who had to travel frequently. Secondly, however, constructing a new system takes up spaces and costs bigger amount of money comparing to upgrading the old one The HSR in Taiwan had caused conflicts in selecting the adequate location and also once appeared financial crisis due to expensive construction costs.

In my opinion, government should evaluate the possibility and compablity of improving existing systems. This can achieve a result of spending less money. Take my country for example, a new type of train using 100-years-old system was established 10 years ago, cutting half the time traveling among cities. With this approach, the government only needed to buy new trains and slightly altered the system. The best feature of this approach is that no new railway was needed.

To sum it up, building a fast train system with new railways or improving the old ones can both achieve better public transportation. I believe government should take upgrading old railways first since it costs less. In conclusion, whether constructing a new system or upgrading the old railway, we should evaluate according to the needs and circumstances of one country and also take cost-benefit analysis into consideration.
stacy422   
Sep 9, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 1: describe a table about forest land [3]

You can use some words that are more formal. For example, significantly instead of a lot.
For your last paragragh, I think you can add some more adjectives to enforce that it is dropping immensely.
stacy422   
Sep 9, 2018
Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK 2: ANIMAL SHOULD BE "EMPLOYED" OR THEY SHOULD HAVE THE RIGHT AS HUMANS ? [4]

Hi! I'm not a professional , but I do see some points needed to be improved here.
1. myriad of people who believe that
2. so why they cannot having ---------so why cannot them have
3. Take the eastern culture as an example. ------- use the comma

I'm also preparing for IELTS. There are some difficult vocabularies here that I don't understand. However, you should also be careful on some basic grammars! Good luck!
stacy422   
Sep 5, 2018
Writing Feedback / Hi! I'm currently preparing for IELTS. This is one of my writings for describing a map [2]

commuting ways to a city hospital



The maps illustrated the difference of the ways to arrive at a city hospital in 2007 and 2010.
The most recognizable change is that there used to be no bus station in 2007, but it was constructed over the span of three years. On the other hand, staff and public park were separated in 2010 whereas both of these people were allowed to park at the east side of the Hospital Rd.

In order to establish the bus station, roundabouts were constructed at both ends of the Hospital Road. The Bus Station was located at the west side of the Hospital Road, harnessing the space which was once empty. People can access to the Hospital by bus in 2010.

In addition, the public car park was divided from the staff car park. The public car park was situated beside the building of the City Hospital which was slightly bigger than the staff car park. Therefore, people who drove to the hospital instead of taking the bus, should park at the east side of the main building.
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