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Posts by Paulscs
Name: Paul Calderon
Joined: Sep 8, 2018
Last Post: Oct 8, 2018
Threads: 2
Posts: 2  
From: Dominican Republic

Displayed posts: 4
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Paulscs   
Oct 8, 2018
Scholarship / Why I've chosen these universities as my preferred universities? Study plan for scholarship [2]

I would extremely grateful if anyone reviews my study plan for my career in the gks scholarship. Thanks for your time in advance.

Study plan for korean government scholarship

Please state the reason you choose such universities and departments (or majors), your academic goals, specific plans (including timeline) to achieve them, and future plan after completion of your study. In case that preferred departments (or majors) of the preferred universities are different, please mention about them separately.)

I have a fascination with the fact that mechanical engineers have changed the course of humanity countless times by solving the problems that have been holding us back by creating something as simple as the wheel or as complicated as the airplane. This is one of the reasons on why I'm certain that mechanical engineer is my passion.

I've chosen the iconic X1X2X3 universities as my preferred universities.X1 University, X2 University, and X3 University are acknowledged as the top between Korean universities and they also all have distinguished mechanical engineering courses. These universities also provide an ample quantity of co-curricular activities/institutes/groups and research institutes that can enhance my studies. I would also have superior internship opportunities. My choice of universities match my ambitious nature and will bring me great support on gaining the knowledge and connections to have a fulfilling study and future work life.

I have planned achievable and result-focused goals for my years coursing in mechanical engineering. During these years, my most important goal is to have remarkable grades which is to be expected of a student funded by the Korean government. Like I did in high school, I will join different cultural and career-related clubs and take part in volunteer activities such as X1 University Rural Voluntary Service or join X University's Social Service Organization. I will be researching in-depth about different branches of mechanical engineering that have the most demand and are the most interesting. Completing an engineering internship will be one of my first concerns. Finally, I will create a social network with friends and the faculty to create connections that can beneficial.

During my first year of university, I will put a lot of effort into becoming familiar with the life of a university student. I'll be joining any club of my interest and commit to it. I'll also make it a priority to form a social network of friends both foreign and Korean to help me with the familiarization process. In this year, I will start to start putting steps into real engineering and come up with a solid research topic.

During my second year of university, I'd look to volunteer/work in the research institutes of my university. Working or volunteering will allow me to explore my career direction. For the moment, I have an interest in X2 University's Thermal Engineering in Manufacturing Process Laboratory, X2 University's Robotics Group and X3 University's Center for Optically-Assisted Ultra High-Precision Mechanical System. I'll also be attending my clubs and putting some time for volunteer work.

During my third year of university, I will be engrossed in research and projects. At this point, I'll be deciding what exact branch or area of mechanical engineering I will head to in the future. These can be the manufacturing, energy or nanotechnology branches. By the end of the year, I will apply to do a summer internship and in preference in a place where I can work on the branch of my interest.

Finally, my fourth year of university will be my final chance to make my hard work worth the effort. I hope I'll have work experience and knowledge in a branch of mechanical engineering of my interest gained from the summer internship to help me with the fourth year curriculum. The fourth-year having the most variety of courses and electives will be the most crucial year for me as a student. With my new knowledge and a clearer path, I'll pick the electives that best match the direction I'm heading to and make me become a first-rate engineer.

My years as a university student will be filled with work and an intense pressure but I'm confident that my ambition and yearning for knowledge will allow me to succeed as a prominent student. I will not put my effort with no aim, as I will strategically shape my course in a way that I can learn in-depth both theoretically and practically. All with the ultimate purpose of my future plans.

Following my bachelor's degree, I will hopefully stay and work in South Korea. I will make it a priority to get a job in a company that already has some influence or has the potential to expand their market into the Dominican Republic. Companies such as Korea Electric Power (KEPCO) are gaining ground in my country and many Korean brands such as Samsung and Hyundai already dominate their own market. Working in these companies or similar ones would be ideal. I will become an engineer from a distinguished Korean University that can speak Korean, English, and Spanish and be of great help to the economic relationships of Central-American and Caribbean countries with South Korea. In the distant future, I will do my master's degree to specialize in a branch of mechanical engineering that will shape the future.
Paulscs   
Oct 8, 2018
Scholarship / A genuine leader can be able to initiate a change and open the doors to better worlds. Scholarship [4]

This essay needs some serious improvements in structure. Perhaps you could divide the big paragraph into two. In the first paragraph you could tell your anecdote and then what you gained from it or what exactly does it show about yourself that makes you a valuable applicant. On the second paragraph you could include the second anecdote but two anecdotes can make your essay quite circuitous and prolix. Also, use spacing at end of every sentence.
Paulscs   
Oct 8, 2018
Graduate / Why I choose the Master of Science in Public Health program at XXXX University - personal statement [3]

"how close it was to contact" I think you meant contract.
You seem to have forgotten to use articles in some sentences: "just like most of the teenagers" The Number of ... at a rapid pace too," "born in an environment" I added in bold whats missing. You should revise your personal statement since it has many grammatical mistakes. To save yourself some work and time just use Microsoft Word or Grammarly.
Paulscs   
Sep 8, 2018
Scholarship / What engineering means to me - pursuing success in Korea (mechanical engineering field) [3]

KGSP Undergraduate Personal Statement

To me engineering is not simply the designing and building of things, it is more of a creative art where I can utilize my knowledge and the laws of nature to ultimately conceive improvement in humanity. I'm confident while saying that I'm hardworking, ambitious, adventurous and committed enough to take maximum advantage of the opportunity of studying mechanical engineering in the prosperous country that the Republic of Korea is.

I come from a family of engineers, being one of the youngest, my uncles would often take me to work with them to let me learn and perhaps find my passion in an earlier stage of my life. With them, I've been taught to think and reason logically, pay attention to details and be inquisitive. Through my childhood by going through many experiences with them, I got to know what it is to be disciplined and hardworking and I've always known how lucky I was to be born in a family that put so much focus on my growth. When I was 10 years old, my parents decided to put extra effort at work to enroll me into a new school where I could receive much better education at a cost they could barely afford with the help of many other family members. I was living a life of study until a year ago. My parents divorced with many legal complications leaving my parent's business near bankruptcy. I had a tough senior year and right after graduation, I had to quickly get a job in order to save money so I could one day attend a local university. Through this, I realized what it takes to be an adult. I believe that being given the opportunity to study in a country such as South Korea that has thrived despite its difficulties, will perhaps allow me to one day thrive as well.

I graduated from high school as an honor hall student. During this period of time, I pushed myself to the limits and joined many clubs and do numerous activities. I was a member of the Spirit Club where we did beach clean-ups, fundraising for social causes and many other things, one of them being, The Community for Learning's "Eco Spirit" project. I was the head of the engineering team of the project in which we designed and built a plastic shredder for quick use at schools in order to recycle 4 different types of commonly used plastic. With this project, we won 2nd place at the "Premio Greta a la InnovaciĆ³n Ambiental en la Escuela" and were rewarded with a generous amount of money for the Spirit Club. I was also the captain of the school's robotics team in which we made several 3D printed racing drones and even got the opportunity to showcase them at the "Santo Domingo Mini Maker Faire". The experience of leading two different teams and working with my teammates made me become a complete leader. I was also a member of the school's Running Club and Ultimate Frisbee team. Outside of school, I took 4 trimesters of Korean language at the KOICA's Korean course and worked as a Summer Camp Counselor for Recrea in the summer of 2015, 2016 and 2017. Overall, I learned how to manage my time, acquired sincere enthusiasm and became substantially more confident in reaching my goals.

If anyone has inspired me in any way, the first one ever to come to my mind would be my physics and chemistry teacher, Dennis Negron. A good teacher is one that can be someone's foundation pillar and Mr. Negron has been the foundation pillar of many students, including me. While I was in the 10th grade, my teacher once told me that to make my life interesting I should challenge myself and to give it a meaning I should overcome these challenges. I adapted this into my life philosophy and it is why I am now aiming to be the mechanical engineer that one day can have a strong effect on improving the economic relationship that the highly-industrialized South Korea has with the Dominican Republic and other Spanish-speaking countries. With the experience gotten from studying in South Korea, I would be able to identify business opportunities between both countries considering that South Korea relies in a great extent on its exports to fuel its economy while the Dominican Republic is the country with the highest growth expectation of Central America and The Caribbean. Many more products and materials can still reach the Dominican Republic and many other Korean companies can establish their influence in the country as well. I believe that by learning the Korean language diligently and applying my engineering knowledge to the booming manufacturing industry that South Korea has, I can become a great aid in improving the relationship between the two countries.

Giving me this opportunity is something that the South Korean government will not regret. I submit this application with the hope of bringing new challenges into my life and to hopefully one day do what engineers do; conceive improvement in humanity.
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