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Posts by Toan dep trai
Name: Vu Dinh Toan
Joined: Aug 3, 2019
Last Post: Aug 7, 2019
Threads: 1
Posts: 7  

From: Viet Nam
School: THCS Ly Thuong Kiet

Displayed posts: 8
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Toan dep trai   
Aug 7, 2019
Faq, Help / Why are some people getting suspended? [45]

Can I ask that if my comment is useless and not enough to help other people will get suspended? Because I am just a student and do not have too much knowledge like everyone else, but I have to comment and I was trying my very best in order to write my next thread. So how can I know that my comment is not helpful/

Also, can I get pieces of advice from other posts by commenting? Will I get suspended?
Thank you for reading this. Read comments from the Contributor and try to make similar ones.
Toan dep trai   
Aug 6, 2019
Writing Feedback / Range of subjects which system is appropriate [3]

Next time, please provide the specific question of the essay, so the readers will be easier to correct your essay :). Others are all well-written but in the 3rd paragraph, why it's get separated?
Toan dep trai   
Aug 6, 2019
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2 Both sides opinion : Should elderly people be forced to retired or not? [5]

There are lines that are unnecessary and should be removed or replaced. Like this one "Nowadays, as the population grows time after time", you should focus more on the content rather than these lengthy lines. The more straight the better! " both sides of the argument " should turn to " both perspectives " because it is more straight . forward and short! And just like Maria said, it lack of linking words, so it is quite messy! Hope you will do better in future :)
Toan dep trai   
Aug 5, 2019
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing Task 2: Professionals and non-professionals are equal and should get paid equally? [3]

Hello everyone, please help me because I am just a newbie.

some professions should be more profitable



Question: Professionals like doctors, teachers and lawyers contribute equally to society with non-professionals including entertainers and sports people. Thus, they should receive equal pay. Agree or disagree?

Essay:
It is argued that jobs such as doctors, teachers, and lawyers help society the same as entertainers and players. Therefore, they should get paid equally. I completely disagree with this statement and I think that professionals should get a higher salary. (is this ok?)

On the one hand, saying that entertainers and players are worthy to get paid fairly to professionals is true. In fact, entertaining is not an easy job, artists have to make people laugh as well as keep the audiences stick to them. Many think that entertainers were born with talents, but they also have to work diligently, practice all the time to become a better of themselves. Besides, the media is maybe a fertile land for artists to make money but also dangerous somewhat. Just some graceless behavior or uncomely words can end the whole career of an artist. Thus, they have to be very viligant to everything they do, which also looks like doctors.

However, I still stick to my opinion that occupations such as doctors, teachers, and lawyers should be paid higher. Firstly, those jobs demanding a high amount of knowledge and carefulness. This kind of carefulness is of course way higher than the carefulness of the artists. If artists are not careful, audiences just get unsatisfied, but if doctors, teachers, and lawyers are not fully careful and concentrate, it causes a disaster. Doctors forgot removing a needle in a body, that person dies. Teachers often use bad language in the class, that generation goes down. Lawyers can not protect its client due to lack of knowledge, no more justice in the world. Thus, professional jobs require a high responsibility.

In conclusion, although artists have to work very hard and diligent to make a living, professional jobs are more sensible to be get paid higher.(301 words)

I will be really grateful if you comment in my essay. Thank you very much for reading this!
Toan dep trai   
Aug 5, 2019
Writing Feedback / IELTS task 2 practice: The relation between poverty and crime [3]

Can I ask what kind of prompt is this because this is the first time I have seen this prompt. Why is this essay only consisting of 3 paragraphs? Because of this kind of question?Basically I really want to help you but because I am not clear what kind of question in IELTS task 2 is this :).
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