Unanswered [9] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by camkimble
Name: camerin kimble
Joined: Sep 27, 2019
Last Post: Sep 27, 2019
Threads: 2
Posts: 3  

From: United States
School: Caddo Parish Magnet High School

Displayed posts: 5
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camkimble   
Sep 27, 2019
Writing Feedback / IELTS/ TASK 2/ More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past [3]

change "the" to "a" in your first sentence
add an "s" to generation
don't say "to me" in the last sentence of 1st P
delete "do" last sentence
change babies to children" and "consisting of" to "such as"
delete cost"
"about in career path"
add "off" in because the belief"
"they"=> "one"
"they have"=> "one has"
remove "s" from works
delete "turning to other reasons relating"=> "In the financial aspect"
"the money for" => "the cost of"
delete "so"
"was" => "is"
add "that" to "myriad fees have"
add "that" to some disadvantages* may
camkimble   
Sep 27, 2019
Scholarship / Questbridge - Describe an experience that caused you to change your perspective and/or opinion. [2]

National College Match Essay #2



Describe an experience that caused you to change your perspective and/or opinion.

Our mission began on a particularly cloudy day. Driving to our local Providence House, there was a pit in my stomach that just would not go away. Arriving, I saw many cars parked in the lot for what I assumed was volunteer work or the regular workers. Walking into the building, a strong feeling passed over me and I was immediately met with uneasiness. I continued to walk into the building where I saw a group of people gathered in one area, which I found to be the dining hall. Many of the people there looked content, but there was one person whom I felt I needed to talk to. As I began to approach their table, I realized that the person had been crying and took it upon myself to try to help them in any way possible. We began talking and the woman's name was Michelle and she told me that she had lived on the streets for most of her life. She was around 30 years old when we met and a couple of years prior, she decided she would get her act together and try to become the person she always knew she could be. She received a spot at the Providence House and began her journey. We continued our conversation and she really emphasized the hard times and when she wanted to give up and go back to her old lifestyle. Her faith was the one thing that kept her together and helped her push through. Then, she remembered the whole reason she was crying. Word was received that she was offered a job that would finally break her free of the past life she was living. While I was never told what it was, I am positive that she deserved it and like many others in the world, would take this opportunity to look back and thank everyone that helped her along the way. After spending my whole day there, I went home and all I could think about was how grateful I am for the things and opportunities presented to me.
camkimble   
Sep 27, 2019
Scholarship / Questbridge National College Match - you and the context in which you have grown up [2]

Biographical Essay for Questbridge



We are interested in learning more about you and the context in which you have grown up, formed your aspirations, and accomplished your academic successes. Please describe the factors and challenges that have most shaped your personal life and aspirations. How have these factors helped you to grow?

A family sat around waiting impatiently for a phone call from my school. I sat along with them silently reminiscing on all the things that I had done to get to that point- working hard in school, always doing more than was required, having perfect attendance to get all that I could out of my education. My mother and father were always there to help whenever I needed it. I was snapped out of my nervous thoughts when my mom screamed in excitement. I had won Student of the Year in 5th grade! My hard work from the previous five years had paid off, allowing me to relish the emotion in the atmosphere. Even as we celebrated, there was something missing.

My parents were always present in my life supporting me in each new challenge and support each new success. There was never an absence of physical support. There was always something missing. I always had a roof over my head, plenty to eat, and all my needs met, but as I looked around, I was left yearning for that something. As I got older, I realized I was missing a strong emotional connection that just was not there. I wanted someone to actually talk to about how my day was or what happened at school. To share my genuine experiences without having to be lectured was all I was looking for. I realized that my relationship with my parents was lacking.

As I transitioned into high school, I talked with my friends about things their parents had done or something fun that they had done with their parents. I realized they had conversations with their parents about who they liked or something that I might think inappropriate to talk about with parents. I always felt left out because I could not contribute anything to these conversations. I knew I wanted to try to change something with my parents.

Through the first couple of years, I tended to feel alone because no one that I knew could understand my problems and how I felt. I did not try to seek out someone to talk to because I had a little voice in the back of my mind, causing me to stay away and stop trying to figure this out. While I was at the bottom of this hole that I was in, I found someone who is now my best friend that helped me and allowed me to get everything that I was feeling off of my chest. That person's name is Sam and she is the most amazing friend anyone could ever have. Every day, we talked about school, parents, and just random things that would pop into our minds. Most of the time, we did things that normal teenagers do, just trying to have fun because we knew that freedom would not last forever. One particular night, I had a tough conversation with my parents and it ended badly on my end. I called Sam as soon as I could and told her about what happened an how I couldn't tell them what was wrong because I thought they wouldn't understand. Sam helped me build up the courage to actually talk to my parents.

After much thought, I composed myself and talked to my parents about what I really needed and how our relationship was. The talk was a long one that lasted for hours. Things were said that I could never imagine would be said, but we talked about how we could maintain a closer relationship and have times where I could talk to them like a friend, but still in a parently way. There was a point where we finally understood each other and things that needed to be said was said. The feeling I had after was so relieving; I was the most relieved I had ever been in my entire life. While I didn't have the stereotypical parent relationship, the journey of me expressing my feelings in a time of need really allowed me to realize that it is okay to ask for help when it is really needed, but it also helped me become more independent and stand on my own two feet, even if it is a struggle to do so.
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