Unanswered [0]
  

Posts by peachyfrenchfry [Suspended]
Name: Rubaha Ahmed
Joined: Jun 5, 2021
Last Post: Jul 16, 2021
Threads: 2
Posts: 5  
From: Pakistan
School: Roots Millenium

Displayed posts: 7
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
peachyfrenchfry   
Jul 16, 2021
Undergraduate / Critical Thinking is the key to success [3]

There are a lot of grammatical errors in this essay. It almost feels as if you haven't been bothered to proofread it. Also, it is unclear whether this is a personal statement or some other writing exercise. But in case this is a personal statement, it is not the best way to start off by describing what critical thinking is and only getting to yourself in the second paragraph.

I hope this helps in some way.
peachyfrenchfry   
Jul 16, 2021
Undergraduate / Winning a Competition and Getting Involved in Organizations; NUS Achievements Personal Statement [3]

If your intended major is computer science, why would you throw it off by mentioning other subjects that you're not very good at? The prompt asks you to highlight your achievements in your field of interest so I don't think you should mention your failures--something that you haven't been asked about--in a completely irrelevant field. Also, you only state that various organisations have shaped you as a person and not HOW it has shaped you. Maybe you were shy to take up leadership positions but your teammates helped you overcome that shyness by being supportive or that you found yourself thinking critically--something that you perhaps weren't initially very good at. I'd advise you to emphasize on the descriptions. Try to make the essay unique to yourself and not something that any other person can come up with.

Hope this helps!!
peachyfrenchfry   
Jun 24, 2021
Undergraduate / "A discussion that has meant the most to me" Undergrad college application essay [3]

Harvard university essay prompt:

An intellectual experience (course, project, book, discussion) that has meant the most to you.



Please comment on whether or not the essay fulfills the requirement of the prompt and suggest potential changes that can be made to make the essay better.

A discussion that has meant the most to me:

"A.I Winter"- The first time I heard this phrase, it sounded right out of a doomsday science fiction novel. And I learned that it was just about that. While discussing the creative writing topic "The End Of Mankind", My IGCSE English Language teacher explained it to the class that there was a period when society lost interest in artificial intelligence and scientists no longer imagined robots walking around, talking, looking like us, or beating us at complicated games of strategy.

Thanks to science fiction, almost all of us knew that the first thing that A.I will do is take-over the defense grid and nuke us all. Living in a world with artificial intelligence all around us, maybe an A.I winter is what we need. As my mates and I referenced novels such as Rossums's Universal Robots, the realization struck me that for some reason, the first possibility of a sci-fi doomsday story plot that came to our minds was that of an outlandish scenario with killer robots, job-stealing AIs, and God-like super-machines instead of more realistic threats that we face today -climate change for one. Why is it that living in a "post-shock" era we feel that every new technology that we fantasize should already be here yet as a society we hold firm belief in one of the biggest A.I winterist ideologies that this technology is the very thing that will bring doom to us? Maybe, just maybe, A.I will eventually end us all, but is an A.I winter really something we want while we eagerly anticipate the introduction of driverless cars?

Raising this point in class ignited a discussion about the public reaction to the novel Brave New World. When it was published it was obvious to everyone that a world with no rebellions, no dissatisfaction, just free sex, rock and roll, and drugs is a frightening dystopia but it's very difficult to put a finger on exactly what's wrong in a society in which people are hacked in such a way that they are satisfied all the time. Today, more and more people read Brave New World as a straight-faced utopia and I think this shift is really interesting since it depicts the changes in our view towards technology as well.

Fifty years ago, the idea of living among robots was the fodder of dark sci-fi. Yet In 2021, there is apparently nothing so disturbing about keeping artificial intelligence in our pockets, asking Alexa to send that pending email or submitting college application essays using many, many versions of A.I. What happened to the society that feared killer robots to end up adapting robots as the new norm? Why is it that we obsessed over A.I in the 70s, then gave in to winterist ideologies only to return to it with ideas that re-imagined life and philosophies that continue to drive us?

Aside from allowing me to take on sci-fi with a never seen before perspective, this discussion made me develop an interest in the amalgamation of Cognitive Science and Computer science to learn about our brains and the machines that might increasingly resemble them. Allowing us to understand how society relates to new technologies, this will be especially useful in predicting the future of A.I and determining whether or not fiction is in fact a medium to reveal the truth that reality obscures and how to not get to the point where super-machines terminate us.
peachyfrenchfry   
Jun 7, 2021
Undergraduate / My blog - extracurricular activities essay - Undergrad College Application [3]

Merged:

Sustainability in the fashion industry - Extracurricular activities essay



Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experience (50-150 words)

Sustainability but make it fashion - said a poster at a seminar I attended regarding sustainability in the fashion industry. No doubt the idea of textile manufactured solely from waste caught my attention but how many of us would be able to afford a 300$ tee-shirt to help save the environment?

By sharing my concerns regarding the proposed revolution on my blog, I was able to collaborate with other bloggers to work on an idea I came up with to solve the problem at hand: To make sustainability fashion yet affordable. By combining the API inventories of collaborating second-hand stores, we were able to develop a basic app allowing people to thrift-shop with ease, therefore promoting circularity in fashion. To tackle the damage that the fast-fashion industry has been causing to our environment for decades, we will have to be creative so to save our environment from utter destruction.
peachyfrenchfry   
Jun 5, 2021
Undergraduate / My blog - extracurricular activities essay - Undergrad College Application [3]

Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences

. (50-150 words)

I like talking to people. And I like to thrift-shop.
Through my blog, I have been able to intertwine my two passions to create blog posts to raise awareness regarding the destruction that fast-fashion is causing to our environment and to advocate for thrift-shopping as a means to reduce our carbon footprint.

My blog is also an avenue for me to connect with a greater community of environmentally conscious minds and since I care deeply about connecting with others, I'm really grateful that I get to work towards a common goal as part of a team. Knowing that through my writings, my fellows have been inspired not to just commit to sustainability themselves but to advocate for it along with me, encourages me to stay on a lookout for research opportunities and seminars through which I can learn to contribute to this cause at a more significant level.
ⓘ Need academic writing help? 100% custom and human!
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳