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Posts by michaelrulaz
Joined: Oct 30, 2009
Last Post: Dec 15, 2009
Threads: 2
Posts: 5  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 7
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Dec 13, 2009
Undergraduate / Family culture/enviroment influences and why i choosed to apply UCF essay [5]

Here are the essay prompts, all help is appreciated.
1. How has your family history, culture or environment influenced who you are?
2. Why did you choose to apply to UCF?

My family history has had a major impact on my life. Both my parents were addicted to heroin. And my life has been a rocky road. From being taken away by DCF to witnessing horrific events -- including my dad's death and both my parents overdosing on drugs -- I have gained special perspective on the human experiences of disappointment and sorrow. Without a doubt it has influenced who I am, I will not even consider the use of drugs or alcohol because I do not even want to imagine ending up like either one of them. It has driven me to become the very best I can, never accepting failure and working my hardest in school. I now know that the only way to success is if I make something out of myself. And using my wisdom of my family, I know what not to do. I know not to make the mistakes of my father and stay in school, and I know not to even give in the slightest to the temptation of using drugs. So that I can rise above the tragedy, that was my parents and my early childhood, and create a better life for me. Having this knowledge I know that it will push my studies at UCF, so I can graduate and become a lawyer and help out families just like mine and give back to the community that supported me in my darkest hour.

I chose to apply to UCF for multiple reasons; one of those reasons is that that it's been a tradition for me. Going to campus visits and just being amazed by the sheer size of the campus, all the students heading to their classes, the knight's football team and their victories. I want to be a part of something larger, than I am. All the while staying in the state and in the area I love. I want to be able to see my family for every holiday or just because I feel like it. I am not just going to attend UCF; I am going to be a part of UCF. I want to tell my friends and people I meet that I have been to a school that invokes a great tradition in the community. Not to mention that UCF has an amazing academic program, many wonderful clubs that fit my individual interests. Out of all the universities I have looked into UCF offers the most of any university or college that I have looked into, with numerous clubs such as; the knight riders; the gaming club; and the UCF psychology club, just to name a few. These clubs will like minded people, which I will develop lifelong friendships with. UCF will finish my transference to the 'real world" and more than aptly prepare me for my future goals and career.UCF is not just a university to me, it's a lifestyle.
Dec 12, 2009
Undergraduate / Common Application Essay - Topic of your Choice - Importance work ethic [5]

Simply stated, in order to get anywhere or to do any task , effort must be put forth. Throughout society their are those who work just enough to keep their job, or those who simply sit at home with no initiative. Living with this mentality will not allow for advancement in one's life, which can lead to feeling unimportant. On top of disappointment of oneself, society views those who do not contribute negatively. Those who are able to rise from poverty to wealth and power show the promise of having a strong work ethic. One such example is former president Bill Clinton. Raised by his grandparents at the beginning of his life, and later being raised by his mother and an alcoholic stepfather, BillClinton committed himself to his schoolwork and set his sights on becoming a public leader. His dedication to school allowed him to obtain scholarships and to attend prestigious schools to get the education he needed to enter politics. Eventually the man who had a rough childhood became president of the United States solely by maintaining a strong work ethic to reach his goals.

It might help if you replace prestigious schools, with the actual schools he attended. Also never address a person by their first name, unless in a non-formal manner. When writing formally always use the last name.
Dec 12, 2009
Graduate / 'What's in my leasure time' -- My 2nd fellowship applicant essay [6]

One thing i have noticed is your grammar. I am not a grammar master myself, as i took make many mistakes. However you need to make sure that you talk in the same tense the whole way through. For example;

I have became acustomed to reading or learning something new in my leisure time because of those writings. I will attend extra courses in other disciplines to killin my leisure time even though they are not graded. One is the fundamental introduction to building constructions. And I found this class is rather useful in my later HVAC system designs in the curriculum
Oct 30, 2009
Undergraduate / UF admissions essay my dads death and the experience [3]

In the space provided, please write a concise narrative in which you describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your ideas about student responsibility, academic integrity, campus citizenship or a call to service.

Tears ran down my somber ...