Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by jensy
Joined: Oct 31, 2009
Last Post: Dec 6, 2010
Threads: 2
Posts: 5  

From: Bouvet Island

Displayed posts: 7
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
jensy   
Dec 6, 2010
Research Papers / A feasibility report to install designated smoking areas [3]

Executive Summary

Due to the freedom students have with smoking, there is a higher chance for students being in the risk of second hand smoking. Nonsmokers who are exposed to passive smoking have a greater chance of susceptibility to heart disease and a greater chance of getting asthma. One solution to this problem is to install designated smoking areas so students who do smoke are forbidden to smoke on the same pathways as everyone else. to smoke in public places thereby minimizing the effect of passive smoking on non-smokers/teetotalers.
jensy   
Dec 5, 2010
Undergraduate / Interested in mathematics and physics (science) - Subject of personal importance [3]

Hi,

Your essay is good.Needs just some fine tuning.

Since a child, I was always inquisitive about everything surrounding me, I kept questioning why something works this way ,not that way. This inquisitive nature has led to my fascination for biology.

Among the different disciplines of biology, I find the subjects Mathematics/physics the most interesting/intriguing.

Hope this helps. I am also little confused about subject priority.I feel you can concentrate one one specific subject so that you can clearly express your fascination for that subject.
jensy   
May 30, 2010
Scholarship / "My father's death wish", scholarship essay: Most challenging inicident of my life [2]

Hi frnz....This is a Scholarship essay about the most challenging inicident of my life the outcome was quite satisfying for me and which has made me very proud. The essay should not be more than 4000 character. It needs editing and some improvements...Plz help....

Some incidents in life makes you rediscover you as a person and give you strength to overcome every obstacle that comes your way. I would like to mention one such incident in life which played a very important role in deciding my future.

This dates back to some 15 years when my father succumbed to the deadly disease of cancer. During his ailment my frequent visit to the hospital made me realise the trauma of the people affected by the disease. I also saw the struggling of the poor people who couldn't afford the expenses of the treatment. As a death wish my father wanted me to do something which could bring atleast a little change in the lives of those ailing people. Even though I was not sure at that time as to how to help these people I got the solution when I was at my own to choose my career after higher secondary. I desired to work in the field of cancer biology so that I can ultimately contribute something to the betterment of those struggling people.

I decided to take up Biotechnology as my core subject so by which I can adopt Cancer Molecular biology at my postgraduate level. But I wasn't really sure about the area and focus of my research. By extensive research I discovered that Germany is the ideal place where I could find a good guidance about my research interest. And once I decided to go to .... University for my higher studies that changed my entire life style and personality.

Since studying at one of Germany's best research institute requires hard work and rigorous planning I started preparing myself for the demands for the education abroad. As a first step towards going to Germany I enrolled to German class at ... during my last semester. I travelled by bus to reach the class as a result of which my entire evenings were devoted to it. Since I also had my research project during my final year time management became a very difficult problem. I got special permission in my lab to work from 10.00 p.m. to 12 p.m. Since I didn't have infinite time at my hand I became more efficient at my work by managing the little time I got. In fact then only I realised that I had become more focussed and planned at my work.

Before my decision to go to Germany I used to be very shy and introvert person who had little self confidence about herself. But when it occurred to me that changing myself is the first step for realising my goal I shed my inhibitions and started preparing for it. I started doing all the preparation s on my own starting from applying for the passport to writing the IELTS exam. Hailing from a conservative background where I got little guidance about educational matters, coming so far itself turned out very tough. My IELTS scores came as a boost to my confidence.

When I started to applying for various scholarships I had look inside myself as what kind of person I really am, to answer the questions about my passion and interests. As I started to think about my original self, I discovered that I am so much passionate about my career that I am ready to face any challenges that comes on my way. Hailing from a lower middle class family and dreaming to go abroad for higher studies without any financial back-up isn't the thing which most of the people will opt for, in similar circumstances. But I am that kind of person who never gives up a dream because of hurdles.

Also my scholarship interviews demanded me to travel to different places which made me bold enough to face my own matters. Even though years have passed since my father's death, his wish tends to remain as a constant support and encouragement which has given me inner strength to dream for the difficult but feasible goal. I am still trying to make his dream true in spite of my financial constraints and I hope that someday I will make his wish come true. There are numerous people with similar aspirations but unable to pursue it because of demands of life or due to some of their personality traits. But I am happy that I have not given up my father's death wish due to my weaknesses. If it hasn't been the one incident, I would have lived a life without any dream or goal. Looking back I can see how I have grown as an independent and social conscious person from an introvert and self-centred person. I attribute my changed personality and my passionate dream to my father's death wish. I am proud about how I have taken the one incident in life as my guiding light for my future.
jensy   
May 30, 2010
Undergraduate / Appeal Essay for Science Course [5]

Since u explained about chemistry in past tense,i guess the following should also b in past tense.

This happened with my Mathematics too,with my grades improving from U to C.

Good luck.
jensy   
May 30, 2010
Writing Feedback / IELTS ESSAY: INFLUENCE OF LARGE FACTORY [3]

In the 3rd paragraph I feel that the term environment degradation or pollution will be more apt than contamination.

Its advantages will outweigh disadvantages as long as the factories impose strict regulations on waste disposal.

However with rapid industrialisation the advent of new factories could not be avoided.

Needs just some more brushing work. Make some more improvements and try to include more precise points. You can definitely score 7 to 7.5 in IELTS
jensy   
Nov 15, 2009
Graduate / sop for masters in biotechnology [4]

Here is my sop.Plz suggest some improvisations

STATEMENT OF PURPOSE

Since the days of my childhood, I had the fortune to live close to Nature, at least for a few months of the year, whenever I visited my native village. This interaction must have sown the seeds of my fascination for Biology. A love for Nature, naturally led to a curiosity about the workings of Nature.

A project for the science exhibition at my School, gave me a glimpse of the enthralling world of Science- the tissue culture of a carrot intrigued me- and that was the beginning of my dream to become a Bio technologist.

Since I was determined to achieve my dream career, I planned carefully; I chose Biology and Mathematics at my Higher Secondary Level, after clearing my Basic School level with 95% grades. Throughout my school days, I maintained outstanding academic records to realise my dream.

I had the good fortune to pursue my course for Bachelor degree in sBiotechnology at Centre for Plant Molecular Biology and Biotechnology, an institution that happens to be the pioneer in molecular biology and bio technology research. The exposure that I have received here has strengthened my resolve to further explore the field of Bio technology.

The course is multi faceted in its content- Plant Breeding, plant and Animal Bio Technology, Environmental and Stress Bio Technology, Bio Prospecting, Tissue Culture and Transgenic Technology, Molecular Bio Technology, Industrial Bio Technology to just name a few. My deep rooted interest in this field has enabled me to obtain 87% marks till my last semester and I am sure that the final results will justify my interests and boost my confidence. Such a flexible course designing has made me confident to pursue a masters in any field of biotechnology since I have basic expertise in all these fields.

As part of our educational project, we had an interesting tour to visit some of the reputed national and international research institutes of India like ICRISAT(Indian council for Agricultural Research), CGIAR, ICGEB(International centre for Genetic Engineering and Biotechnology), to name a few.

Our stay at an Indian village for nearly a month enabled me to have an idea about the impact of Bio technology on the common man and our utmost need to remember the human factor while exploring the fields of research.

My inspiration has been Anand Chakraborty; his work on superbugs has assured me that biotech is not just about research, it is something which strives to make the world a better place to live in.

My Biotechnology work Experience at Madurai Kamaraj University revolved round the "Analysis of aggregation propensity and intrinsic disorder of human proteome " which intensified my flair for research.

To explore the different areas of biotechnology, I choose my final year project in genetic engineering which corresponds to "Expression of Codon optimized synthetic cry2Ax gene in Rice by particle bombardment method"

My primary research interest is drug designing for cancer cure; I hope to find my particular focus with suitable guidance and after further studies. I plan to explore all facets of cancer research starting from understanding the molecular mechanisms, Bioprospecting for potential drugs, molecular modelling and drug designing till bio-pharming.

I am fully convinced that masters in a your university will instill in me the requisite knowledge about the molecular machineries of Cell, guide me in the right direction towards further research and help me realise my dreams about playing a key role in the eradication of Cancer in the near future.

I am sure that the academic environs of your esteemed university will be the ideal place to pursue my Post-graduate education. The more I come to know about the excellent academic profile of your University, the research facilities available there and the educational environment, the more I am eager to pursue my further studies there and build my career.

I am sure you will give me the opportunity to prove my worth and be a credit to your University.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳