Undergraduate / Why Brown - poetic, maybe too much? [4]

Great job! I think the people who edited before me got throught the grammar points, i just have a few ideas to make it sound better...

I have experienced the excitement of discovering things(maybe a different word than "things")that hooked me

I am drawn to Neuroscience because I want to find(maybe instead of "find" you can put "unravel" the answers

Hope this helps and let me know if you have any questions:)

Undergraduate / Boston University 3 words (curious, straightforward, indomitable) [6]

Today, I have focused my inquisitiveness toward more rewarding things (noooo...more formal! maybe "aspects of life", (put period) like [L]earning new hobbies or succeeding at school (have been embedded into my journey of exploration) My insatiable appetite to explore and discover(discover what?) inspires me to take chances, attempt new things (another word...), and to investigate all options.

Love the second paragraph's humor except for last sentence because this is the third time you used "things" ...
"My peers count on me to say things(another word) as they are (maybe: "as the way they appear", and not(to) shy away from the task. I stay true to myself, so people know what to expect from me.

Third paragraph...be a little more formal:
"But (However,) my plans were interrupted minutes later by my camp counselor who carried me hastily (hastily carried me)back to the bathrooms to wash myself off. When my parents instructed me to do as I was told, I couldn't resist to retort with,(put a period) "but why"But why?")?" I was the child who couldn't just accept what people told me; I had to discover things (ahhh another word) on my own.

So, here's the dilemma: you're at 501 words, and if anything you need to cut it down. I personally think you have enough about yourself and i love your examples and the last paragraph was phenomenal. Just pay attention to 3 aspects: make more formal, cut down "things", and cut down anything that you feel is not needed. If you look at the bright side, you only need to cut out one word, and you'll be in the word limit.

Hope this helps:) And let me know if you have any questions.
If you do have time, can you edit my BU supplement essay? That would be awesome.

Undergraduate / Tufts Supp. Self identity and personal expression revision [6]

Although some have told me my interests conflict with each other, I do not feel this way.

Maybe change to "Some have told me my interests conflict with each other, however, I do not feel this way." (or make it two sentences). The one you have is okay but I think putting more emphasis in this sentence will hint that you are going to explain why you are unique.

comprise my identity
Instead of comprise, you can put "encompass"
Hope this helps:)
Thanks so much for the feedback on my BU essay!

Undergraduate / "I'm a GLEEK" (glee show obsessed)- TUFTS self-identity SUPPLEMENT [7]

Make it active voice. Instead of "provided a push" say "provides a push", so that the reader still knows that singing is still making a positive impact on you.

Other than that...awesome job!