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Posts by Nesreen
Joined: May 25, 2010
Last Post: Jan 22, 2012
Threads: 15
Posts: 41  

From: Yemen

Displayed posts: 56 / page 2 of 2
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Nesreen   
Jun 11, 2010
Writing Feedback / gaining knowledge/ More job opportunities; Reasons behind attending universities [6]

What do u mean by this EF

Ha ha, well.. I have so much respect for people who are bilingual. I know a little Spanish, and if I tried to write an essay like this in Spanish it would not be nearly as good as your essay is in English???

Is my English writing is bad as your Writing in Spanish????
Nesreen   
Jun 9, 2010
Graduate / "give an objective description of yourself including your strengths & weaknesses" [9]

Thank you but I guess when you talk about your achievement or accomplishments you to use present perfect also when you talk about something that you don't want to mention the time of it you have to use Present Perfect.

Moreover, when you talk about something which has possibilities to happen again you should you use Present perfect.

Thus, in this statement he has possibility to work again in different industries in the future, and he is talking about his experience without mentioning the exact time, at the same time using present simple.

I have had/ gotten more than 5 years of full time and part time work experience at different industries
Nesreen   
Jun 9, 2010
Graduate / "give an objective description of yourself including your strengths & weaknesses" [9]

Hi Zeinab1383,

your Essay is really Wow I like the information on it; However, the structure is wrong. I mean in the introduction you need to mention in your thesis statement your weakness and strengthen points . Like my strengthen points are.... ,and my weakness points are ....

you don't have to separate the paragraphs as you have done but put them together. for instance, your 2 Strengthen points could have two paragraphs and your 2 weakness points could two paragraph ( if you have two). then the last paragraph is going to be a summary of your thesis statement and your last comments.

you have some grammar mistakes such as:

what I really I am
(In this sentence I guess you have to use Present perfect) I have had/ gotten more than 5 years of full time and part time work experience at different industries

While I was studying at *** with students from different countries,

maybe is better (blend) = mingle

It is more than one year I have been working as Insurance Expert and I have to support ( if you meant that you still working until now)

It is more than one year I was working as Insurance Expert and I have to support ( if you meant in the past)

not the person = on the person

This Sentence should be at the end in the conclusion as your last comments: Like any normal person, I have far and wide weaknesses but the point is that I try to use my strength to overcome my weaknesses.

I get a bad attitude when my colleagues do not do their best, or when they do not care about improving procedures to work more effectively because it always has done like that.

I usually try to be patient about bad behaviors or mistakes

Finally, I know to have a successful in both personal and career life,...

improve my weaknesses= to improve my weaknesses.
Nesreen   
Jun 9, 2010
Writing Feedback / gaining knowledge/ More job opportunities; Reasons behind attending universities [6]

This is my essay. :)

According to the Longman dictionary, the word university means "an educational institution at the highest level, where you study for a degree". In fact, universities differ in many aspects such as educational level, an academic things, and good curricula. Also, our objectives to attend universities differ from person to person. Moreover, the majority of us attend university for two main reasons which are increasing knowledge and getting more chances for jobs in the future.

Many people enter universities to get more information and knowledge in fields we enroll for. Universities are considered as an important source of learning. For instance, because of professors in the universities are well-educated, well-certified and sophisticated. They are considered as a direct source of information from which students can contact and interact with to gain information. Moreover, libraries at the universities are deemed one of most important references for students to get knowledge related to their studying. For example, Libraries contain many references such as books, past papers, researches, articles, and CDs that facilitate research for students.

Beside, one of the main important reasons for attending universities is to get more opportunity for jobs. Nowadays, everything has developed which forces people to improve themselves according to this. For instance, in the past, it was acceptable for an institution to hire an employee who has no knowledge of computers, whereas, nowadays, it is very difficult for an organization to admit an employee who doesn't have at least ICDL certificate even if his job is not related to the computer. Actually the more approved certificates you have the more chances you have for a good job with high salary.

In conclusion, gaining knowledge and having more chances for jobs in the future are considered the basic goals for people to attend universities. In my opinion, to have a certificate from an approval university is not as important as having knowledge and information in your mind. Furthermore, to have information in our minds without using it is a big loss so that when we study something at university, we have to benefit other people by using it.
Nesreen   
Jun 7, 2010
Writing Feedback / TOEFL: Living in a big city has many merit and some disadvantages! [7]

In conclusion, living in a big city has many merits and some disadvantages. For me, I loveLike living in a big city. When I become old, maybe I will move to a small town to enjoy a simple life.

I guess LIKE is more Formal than LOVE.
Keep up writing.
Good Luck
Nesreen   
Jun 5, 2010
Undergraduate / Growing up who was my childhood Hero (My Uncle) [6]

I really enjoy reading the essay. it is really good. but there is something
try to use one tense in your essay that is Past tense.
Growing up I admired my uncle and I would often say "I want to be my like my uncle Meno when I grow up"
Nesreen   
Jun 5, 2010
Research Papers / Thesis statment for globalization Issues [5]

Maybe you can tell him "How does the Globalization affect American life??" "How will American benefit from the Globalization? In which aspects the Globalization benefit American lives "
Nesreen   
Jun 2, 2010
Writing Feedback / Some students prefer to study alone - TOEFL Question [9]

Some students prefer to study alone. Others prefer to study with a group of students. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer?

Study Methods

Everyone has their method to success in life. At school or university, success depends on how we study. Some students benefit a lot when they study with groups. Yet, I prefer to study individually because it helps me to concentrate more, and it helps me to build my personality.

Studying alone helps us to focus more in our lessons. For instance, I am a type of person who cannot comprehend my subjects unless I am alone. I can prepare my schedules, guidelines, exercises and go over them all. Moreover, we have a lot of subjects which require us to sit and study alone such as math, reading, and drawing. In my opinion, I can take advantage of every minute without wasting by studying alone.

Additionally, we are building our personalities when we study alone. For example, answering our homework alone encourages us to be more responsible and independent. Also, it motivates us to be accurate in our work in the future. Personally, when I fix my study plan with a specific time and finish it on time, it improves my ability in the future to become more precise and careful.

To conclude, there are many ways to study and it is our right to choose which is suitable for our characters whether alone or with group. In fact, I agree with the idea of studying a lone since it helps me to focus more and establish my personality. Success needs us to work hard and sacrifice more whether we choose to study alone or with group.
Nesreen   
Jun 1, 2010
Essays / How to start an admission essay about myself? [67]

Mr Dragoon first of all, you have to keep writing and never give up.
Second, all of us have faced the same problem at the beginning but keep reading and check different writing styles. In terms of me, I personally start the introduction as this : the first sentence is very general. then the second sentence is less general. so I keep it less general which is specific until I reach to the thesis statement that is very specific and talks about certain topics that I am going to talk later.

Good Luck dear.
Nesreen   
May 30, 2010
Writing Feedback / Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and playing [3]

Hi renga78

actually I am new here but I can tell you some comments about your essay.

First, in the Thesis statement you have to specify you points there and tell the readers what are those advantages. you have to mention them in the thesis statement to let the readers know what is going on next.

Finally, your conclusion paragraph should be a paragraph not your recommendation. you have to rewrite your thesis statement by using another words then write your comments or recommendation.

Good luck and keep up your writing skill.

Nesreen
Nesreen   
May 29, 2010
Writing Feedback / Leisure time: spend it outdoors or indoors? [8]

Thank you dear for your notes but In my conclusion I summarize all the points that I wrote about?
If you know an academic writing book could you tell me please?
Nesreen   
May 28, 2010
Writing Feedback / Leisure time: spend it outdoors or indoors? [8]

Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoors. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities?

Leisure Time

Everyone has his or her personal reasons behind spending his or her free time indoors or outdoors. Many people prefer to spend their spare time indoors. Maybe it allows them to relax, watch TV or enjoy their time with the family. I personally prefer to spend my leisure time outdoors because it enables me to get more chances to meet new people and to decrease the stress of my life.

Spending our spare time outdoors gives us many opportunities to expand our relationships. It allows us to meet new people, get new perspectives, and new experiences. For instance, in my spare time I am used to going to a club which is near to my home to enjoy the companion of acquaintances. Furthermore, I have met a lot of people who became my close friends later. Also, I have gotten my recently job from people that I've met at that club.

Besides, spending our time outside helps us to reduce our stress that we face during the week. It is common these days for friends to hang out together to have fun, play, and tell jokes. For example, last weekend, I went with my friends to a night club where we danced and sang till midnight. Once I got home, I really felt refreshed and energized. So going outside can help you change the atmosphere and enjoy the excitements of natural around you.

To summarize, people are divided into two categories regarding whether they spend their time inside or outside their homes. In my opinion, you can stay home and enjoy your time with your family, read a book, or watch TV. However, to go outside and breathe new air helps you to refresh your thoughts and soul. Also, it helps you to energize yourself to move on to the next week.

Please I am a new member here and I need your Comments professors in my writing? I need to know my problems to improve them?

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