Unanswered [9] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by frank1992
Joined: Apr 12, 2012
Last Post: Apr 30, 2012
Threads: 3
Posts: 5  

From: Uzbekistan

Displayed posts: 8
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frank1992   
Apr 30, 2012
Writing Feedback / Gambling assessment tool [4]

Hi, I am really concerned about the purpose of writing this essay.
Is it for IELTS or TOEFL?? If so, the content is rich of information, I can say you need to practice your writing by using your own ideas and knowledge.

If not, then the essay is perfect. )) Because, it contains all the necessary information that needs to be covered.

Good luck
frank1992   
Apr 27, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Dear host family' - Global Ugrad exchange program. Describe Yourself. [2]

Please write a letter of introduction to your future American roommate or host family. Please describe yourself. What are your likes and dislikes, hobbies and interests? What activities and organizations do you hope to participate in while in US? What are your home and community like? What accomplishments of yours are you most proud of?

Should not exceed 1000 words

Dear host family,

My name is Farruh, I am 20 years old and I live in Urgench, Uzbekistan. My friends simply call me Fara or Akimich (referring to my family name Akimov). Currently, I am a student of International Management Development Institute of Singapore (MDIS) in Tashkent. By now, I am going through my second year at the Banking and Finance faculty. I can say for sure that I am quite good at Math and Computer Technology, because we had special courses taught at MDIS. Before my graduation, I think of taking some time out of my academic program to have a different life experience. I am already aware that being an exchange student is very challenging, but I am ready for this journey.

As I write this letter, I remember how I was describing myself 10 years ago in my school time, but so far there were so many changes in my entire life that had an enormous influence in shaping my personality. These days, I live with my friends in Tashkent far away from my family, leading a complete independent life almost for three years. Independence gave me lots of experience in terms of my personal and intellectual development. Personally, living apart has become a positive challenge for me, because I taught to be manageable both with my time and my personal expenses. Probably, my friends would describe as an ambitious, communicative, funny and bubbly person. What my friends like is my communication skills, because there is always something that I can think of to keep up the conversation. Besides, I feel myself comfortable around people, which helps me to adapt easily to new atmosphere or make a friend with a complete stranger in a second.

Probably, when you ask my parents they would say that their son is the one who always wants to try new things. My strong passion towards travelling brought me to states on my summer vocation, where I had one of the best experiences of my life and now I have so many wonderful memories that there is no enough space in this letter to write them all. I was so surprised to see how kind and warm most of American people. Today, I can doubt that here in Central Asia or anywhere else, people would be so happy to help or support an outsider. It was an amazing trip to America that I often remember with the hopes and thoughts that someday I will bring my family there.

We are only two children in our family, me and my sister with whom I used to spend most of my free-time. For many years, we had lots of positive and memorable moments that bond us together. My sister tells me that I am very calm and interesting person. What she likes is my energy and humor that makes her laugh all the time. I can say that I try to keep myself in peace of mind, in spite of any problems or difficulties following me. Perhaps, that is the reason why my sister describes me as a calm brother, because normally I don't like showing my anger or feeling of nervousness.

I don't like when people lie to me by looking into my eyes or speak something bad back to me, because I am in nature open and straightforward person. I appreciate when people call me aside to talk to me privately if they don't like something about me. I value people who are honest, supportive and positive with whom I often try to make friends and easily can find a common language. When it comes to environment, I can say for sure that I am a fan of something "noisy", for this reason I am fully aware that I am tolerable with the noisy atmosphere, feeling myself more comfortable around people rather than being alone in a quite place. I am keen on sports, amateur of playing on piano and nature-lover. I am really proud to say that I was so successful at boxing, being awarded several times for having final rounds won. Couple of times, I was named and awarded as the best defender of "Spartak" football team. To be honest, I have never had piano classes, but I used to learn to play on it from my sister. Surely, I am for eco-green environment, because it has passed down on me after my father who loves nourishing our backyard.

I have come from a good and civilized community, where young people are taught to be polite with elders. Urgench is my hometown, the place where I grew up, went to school and spent most of my time living with my family. It is not a big city, having only one trading center and being well-known as a good place for agricultural work. However, what my city lacks is the "green" color, literally there are not that much of trees and beautiful landscapes as in our capital- Tashkent. Frankly, I don't know much about organizations in US, but I would love to participate in parties that go for "green protection".

I hope you could understand what kind of person I am after reading my letter to you. But, there is so much to say that I cannot write them all in this piece of paper. Hope to be an excellent student and a good guest in your home.

Thanks a lot.
Farruh
frank1992   
Apr 27, 2012
Essays / Study abroad (personal statement / letter of intent) - starting ideas [9]

Hi,
In my opinion: reasons for studying should be obvious like travelling stuff, better education, meet new people, cultural exchange, feel the sense of independence, etc.

Then, you can simply point out on your chosen department to relate the topic with your future career. Exemplify, how the education in Turkey can help in your future career.

Take care
Good luck
frank1992   
Apr 27, 2012
Writing Feedback / 'Music is a great way of communication' - my essay [6]

hakan
The first is that music is one of the best way to relax after stressful (...AFTER THE STRESS)

.I am sure that many people will agree with me on this issue because it helps me to feel better about everything leave my troubles behind and enjoy life. ( Too general idea about your feelings: not all people can know what you like except your friends, relatives, family members,etc Repetition of the same words: leave my troubles behind and enjoy life)

Many people gathered on the ceremonies and listened to traditional music. (Better to use Present Simple, because people still enjoy music, but not enjoyed it only in the past)

Take care of grammar. Hope my revisions have been helpful.
I liked the ideas, but the correction is necessary to reach the perfection

Good luck
frank1992   
Apr 19, 2012
Undergraduate / Cultural Exchange and Quality of Education; "Global UGRAD Prog"- Why study in the US? [2]

Please describe why you would like to study in the US. What past experiences have given you this motivation? How will studying on the Global Ugrad program help you learn about America? How will learning about the US influence your personal and professional goals for the future?

The limit should not exceed 1000 words

My passion to learn English was the result of my old teacher in school, who used to say: "Language is what can broaden your horizons". His classes stirred my interest and prompted me to study the language. For many years, I have been confused by the true meaning of his words. However, there was a day when my Mom was packing my travelling staff to USA. Since, I have been assured what he really meant and was trying to explain us in his classes. Frankly, the trip to states was short and fleeting, but full of explorations and excitement. Current days, I really miss the days spent in US, because they were a real challenge for me to feel myself independent and mature.

There are many reasons that motivate me to come back to US again. During my trip on my summer vocation, I missed out the moments to feel the sense of great holidays. For many years, I had a desire to celebrate the Thanksgiving Day in a way as it is supposed to be held. We still celebrate it with my family and friends, but it is too far from anything real. Most of the American holidays hold something special and unusual for me, because they are completely different from our own. I believe, despite many indications to the contrary, that one day I will attain my goal to experience the real culture of US.

However, the most important part is the cultural exchange and quality of education that I would like to discuss further. Today, I can say for sure that US is the culturally diverse as "melting pot", even sitting on a bus you can talk with Spaniard, ask for something the next person who is French and pay to a driver from Colombia. Variety is what makes this country as an ideal place to get better knowledge of mutual understanding. There is no doubt of popularity and well-established image of US colleges. It has become a sort of dream for me to experience the student life in an English-speaking country as an exchange student. Facing many different speaking interactions, listening to lectures and tutorials and having many hours of conversations with my future mates at school are all seductive messages to me, stuck on my island of English in the sea that is my home.

Based on my understanding, it is difficult to overestimate the help and support of the Global Ugrad program, which welcomes students globally in sharing their ideas, values and knowledge to achieve better mutual understanding. The given opportunity is the best way to understand the American history, culture, paradigms and principles by living and celebrating the holidays with a host family and making new friends at school. I can help to fulfill the goals of a program which is specifically designed to bring nations and different cultures together for mutual learning and better cooperation now and in the future.

Learning about US will have an undisputable impact on my future career and prospective job. As a student of MDIS at Banking and Finance faculty, I plan to work as a financier of Uzbekistan in the future. In my opinion, a year of independence far away from home will make me a far more confident, responsible and mature person than I am today. The type of interaction in a multicultural country with different people that I could experience there would help me to become immensely adaptable to the ever changing environment of the world. The everyday experience of face-to-face conversation at a college will make any individual become a more flexible and open-minded person. When it comes to my professional goals, there is no question whether the skills and experiences that I could receive from participating in Ugrad program would affect them. As I have understood the program is the best way to make a step to a diverse cultural interaction, it is a way to be aware of different type of personalities, norms and ideas which people value. As a result of cultural exchange and social interactions I will be more flexible in dealing with different people in my prospective career.

In light of all outcomes, I can say that learning about US is the way to broaden the professional outlook and shape personal skills that might be necessary in the future life. For me it is obvious that studying in US and knowing its culture is a strong push towards leading a professional and competent career back in my country.
frank1992   
Apr 19, 2012
Writing Feedback / IELTS Topic: Air travel should be restricted or not? [3]

Great job.
The essay seems to me well-written, nothing should be corrected.

But:
In fact, this is not the case in many real life experience. (Not clear, what you want to say by that) better to give a clear overview

Overall is good
frank1992   
Apr 19, 2012
Writing Feedback / Government should control some of exhibitions (admisssion in cinemas, theatres) [3]

veru
One cannot deny that painters have the right freedom for paint in any way that they wanted (Needs to be corrected). I mean- One can not deny that painters have a total freedom in expressing their paintings as they wish.

However, people who vandalized the public buildings by painted they are not artist (....by painting...) grammar corrections should be taken care of

the structure is good, but lots of grammar mistakes. I would recommend to review the essay for further corrections.
frank1992   
Apr 12, 2012
Undergraduate / 'I saw many leaders' - Global Ugrad exchange program [NEW]

Please describe your idea of good leadership. Who do you think is a good leader, and why? What is one of his/her leadership traits that you admire? Please provide an example of when you have been a leader. How have you utilized your leadership skills in handling any difficult interactions with someone from another culture or background?

Word limits:should not exceed 1000 words. Mine is about 950.
Feel free to comment and share your ideas. Thanks in advance


These modern days, when I think of a Leader what first comes into my mind is the need of many firms and companies. Personally, I define the "leadership" as the set of traits that change the course, introduce a motive and fire the hopes with the purpose of group success. Generally, leaders are meant to be trustee of a particular group for being an extraordinary and outstanding. It is a person who finds a key to positive achievement, somebody whom people can trust and back up. In my opinion, leadership skills are the product of many years practice and patience, which implies to be more of "nurture" character.

Through my life, I saw many leaders at my school time, in my work place, around my friends, but all of those leaders were incomparable to the leader whom I know for many years, whose leadership skills I could read out from that time when I have started to understand the meaning of a "leader". My father is the person whom I think as a good leader, because of his unique traits and words that he says: "Believe me; it is going to be alright". These are words, seem to me as glimmer of hope that brings back something which is going to be forgotten or abandoned. When they are spoken softly with a smile on the face, I think every son would believe that problem will turn out to be positive and colorful. Among all of his traits being a confident, sharp-witted, positive and having problem-solving skills, I admire him for his former trait that makes my Dad to be lighted up among all of the leaders that I know so far. Having my father as a leader and head of our family, I have never had such days when I doubted upon my Dad's capabilities of being a leader. It is for sure that I can say that not only words play an essential role in solving a problem, but also the actions that follow them up are of great importance.

Since, I have understood what it means to be a leader of some kind of group or organization, I have tried to shape my own personality and build up my character to become a true leader some days. The process of learning was not so difficult, because I used to see a leader every day. It is for sure to say that my Dad applied lots of efforts to shape my personality by giving sensible advices in times I was in need of them. The days of learning were full of ups and downs, where every fail was sort of lesson to understand what it really means to listen, power and energize people around. These days, having thought of my father's intellectual work I can say exactly that it was not useless. It has started to give its results since my school years, when our class decided to organize a school donation on behalf of less fortunate children. What I did not expect is that my teacher decided to make me a leader, because of my past experience of holding a class and being a face of our group. My responsibilities were to inform every class in school about this event in a way that everybody will be aware of donation. At the first glance, the job seemed to be not difficult to cope with if there would not be time constraint that I have been isolated with.

All in all, I had my 10 days to ensure that every one is aware of donation. There were many ideas to deliver the message, but most of them were not effective to reach out those people who less care about what happens around. At last, I have decided to gather class monitors and inform them of our school event. Totally, we have spent 2 days to prepare some hand outs and make our presentation for delivering the message. The donation was successfully accomplished and organized due to applied efforts and our overall team work. Even today, I remember that my school leadership activity, because of its coverage, complexity and interest that it aroused in me. Today, having member of those days I can say that my Dad's efforts of teaching me to be a leader were successful, because still it gives me upper hand in many situations.

However, I did not have a chance so far to use my leadership skills in dealing with any complex interactions with somebody from another background. Perhaps, I will be using my abilities of being a true leader during my studies in US. I am sure that I am capable of managing the team and solving the problems, due to many years experience and practice.

These days, I hold an opinion that everything, what I have been learning from my Dad during the years of my leadership understanding, is extremely important. Currently, I do believe that there will be days, when I will be saying: "Believe me; it is going to be alright".
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