Undergraduate / My family taught me to think about others first and be thankful; Let your Life Speak [3]

I am not confident about my essay...there were many sentences that I even felt akward writing them...well...any comments you make would be very very helpful since my essay is really bad...thank you in advance!!! (do you think I didn't astray from the topic?)

There is a Quaker saying: "Let your life speak." Describe the environment in which you were raisedïyour family, home, neighborhood or communityïand how it influenced the person you are today.(200word limit)

My grandmother is from North Korea. When the Korean War broke up, she was separated from her family and was left with no choice but to come to South Korea.

"There were no more seats left on the train so people started to climb up on the roof. That train was the last one, which was heading south so I quickly joined the people on the roof." Whenever my grandmother vividly explained her coldest and toughest journey, I quietly listened and looked into the eyes that were filled with a deep sorrow. Then, I would stretch my arms to hug my grandmother's bony features to ensure that she was not alone and that I will do my best to replace her brother and sister.

I had lesser aunts, uncles, and cousins than those of my friends'. Sometimes, my friends pitied my father's absence of relatives. However, my family bond was very tight. Each member of the family strived to represent more than two family members. And, I feel the most blessed because of my family. My family taught me to think others first and to be always thankful.

I am, the happiest person in the world. (196words...what a relief that I at least didn't exceed the word limit..)

Undergraduate / 'Considered quitting' - Tufts short answer and essay [18]

I would be great if someone comment & correct grammar //// especially my essay...the word limit is 200 but mine is 251...please please help...:(
am I answering the question? I think I got astray....

Which aspects of Tufts' curriculum or undergraduate experience prompt your application? In short: "Why Tufts?"

Tufts is the place where my academic interest in psychology can be satisfied. The numerous internships offered to the department of psychology and abundant research opportunities would not only fulfill my curiosity but also promote my intellectual pursuit to wholly prepare for my future career. (45words)

(do you think I need to elaborate more? I don't feel like I am reflecting the advice I got on my essay...)

Self-identity and personal expression take many forms. Use the richness of your life to give us insight: Who are you? (199words!!! Yeah~~~)

I met my best friend when I was in sixth grade. We spent a lot of time together. However, as time went by, my friend began to distant me. She said that she did not like me because my fingers were pudgy and short. I was petrified. Nevertheless, my love for dear friend outweighed the disappointment that I felt.

I could not elongate my fingers, but I tried my best for my friend to like me. One day, too preoccupied to suit my friend's appetite, I did not realize that there were blisters on my fingers. Though physically in pain, I continued. And, my efforts finally paid off; I was playing most of musical scores and I was selected as a flute soloist for the school concert.

I am a hard worker. However, there are times that I just want to give up because my fingers are short to hold flute properly or my feet are flat to run well for the school sports. But I try because I do not want to regret in the future that I have not tried my best. I want to live my life with full passion because those efforts integrate my identity.

Undergraduate / Brown short answers (Asian culture) [6]

I need comments and grammatical fixes for my short answers...I am not sure these are sufficient enough for the short answers...am I specific enough? any suggestions??

1.Tell us about the academic areas that interest you most and your reasons for applying to Brown.

The academic area that I would like to study further is Asian culture. Since I realized the discrepancy between the perspectives of natives and the foreigners on the Asian culture, I thought the need of learning in a foreign perspective in order to better understand the culture where I have grown for my entire life. I am applying to Brown because Brown is the place where my passion for higher education can be satisfied. Pursuing education has been my driving force and one of the major parts that has given my life more meaning. At Brown, I will never get bored because the open curriculum and strong academic atmosphere would continuously incite my intellectual pursuit rather than dwindle. Also, I am sure that interacting with people who have walked different paths than mine and professors who are easily approachable would lead my academic interest to the career that I have yet found.

2.How did you become interested in Brown? (for example: college counselor, undergraduate, relative, web site?

I met a Brown undergraduate whose major was classics and soon became interested in Brown. The university that she had described identically matched the one I was looking for: strong academic atmosphere, smaller class sizes than other private universities, easily approachable professors and people with diverse backgrounds. Wanting to know more about Brown, I spend a lot of time browsing web sites and was awestricken every time I found more of Brown's exceptional qualities. Since then I often imagined myself walking in the beautiful campus that Brown has and studying at the library, which opens for 24 hours. Brown is and will be the place I want to be and I am quite confident that Brown will help me to see my future.