Writing Feedback / a pretty short story, Return of satan [5]

this is my little story for my creative writing class final portfolio. btw, the idea of the story is not originally mine. :)

Return of Satan

After centuries and years, one night finally God decided to send someone to Earth to seek Satan. Michael, who was the biggest apple-polisher of the whole throne worried, and excused that Satan's damned forever and he shall never deserve to step back to heavens. God, who well knew Michael, demanded to Samael to do so. Before Samael leaves he went to Michael, "Where shall I seek Satan on Earth?" he asked. "I have never been on Earth!" Michael smiled pleasantly and replied, "just look for the most devious creature, you'll find him soon."

And so Samael headed to the Earth for the first time.

"Earth is a strange place..." Samael thought, as he saw a little girl pushing a coin in a gap to get a ride from a metal horse, and as he saw people living in boundaries and limitations called "countries" and he was more amazed as he saw their pride for it. His heart trembled as he saw churches, mosques, monasteries...where they had cut God in pieces and each had taken a piece. Wherever he sought Satan, he found nothing but people, places and lives that were far worse than the stories he had ever heard of Satan...

After weeks, tired and angry, Samael stopped his search; he preferred to spend his whole life in hell rather than Earth. He remembered the old times, when Satan was the best angle of the whole throne, closest friend of Michael and the most beautiful creature of God... He remembered how once Satan was the quiet, shy angel that everyone loved, and so for a moment Samael decided to instead of looking for the most devious of all, he'd look for the purest...and he found Satan sooner than he thought. With a little bit of excitement and fear he walked to him, but Satan was hiding behind curtains, and so Samael could only tell him the God's message that "you shall be forgiven, but you should come back and do as I say."

Satan lightened his handmade cigarette and smiled, "so he still remembers me." he sighed. Samael didn't hear, or he just pretended so and flew back to heavens to report his journey to God. Michael who was impatiently waiting for him, stopped him and retold the story for God himself that, "Satan is still the same "asshole" that he was and he haven't shown any sign of grief. If you let me God, I'll go and wipe him off of any map in all worlds that it's only a little of what he deserves." But before God speaks, someone blew in a horn and called, "Satan! Satan!"

Everyone froze and all gazes fixed on the door... Satan walked in slowly, all dressed in pearl white, and with his silky black hair hiding half of his face. Michael spitted on the floor with disgust and Samael shivered slightly by Satan's unchanged beauty. Satan kept walking. He passed Michael and Samael as they didn't exist, and finally he stopped, sighed and bowed to God.

"Look up. What is it with you that first you leave me and then now, you're ashamed to look up? Look up that I want to see your face. I created you the most beautiful, but as I've seen you in pictures lately, you're quite different."

"I have not changed," Satan looked up and removed the hair from his face and it shone. He opened his tired eyes, "I have not changed, but the pen is in enemy's hands and he shows me as he wishes. My eyes are red and tired, and that because of my nightly tears..."

Michael cried, "You never knew nothing but bootlicking...you- "

Satan neglected him and went on, "the tears that first because being apart from you, but then they became because of Men becoming more and more apart from you. When you asked me to bow to him, you said he was a part of you. You said he was the best of all your creatures...what happened God? What was wrong with you? Have you ever looked around yourself? Have you ever asked yourself why these angels do whatever you say without thinking? This Michael," he stopped, turned and pointed Michael, "he, who knew himself as the representative of all angels came to me and-"

"Shut your mouth you loathsome ..." Michael shouted as he walked furiously to Satan.

"How dare you Michael?"God cried. Michael backed off and stood aside, but his eyes were full of unsaid words that each of them could kill a soul.

"Continue..." God said.

"Michael came to me and asked me to tell you what others couldn't...and so I did. I said we don't want to bow to man and you threw me out of heavens, but you never realize those who remained closest to you were true enemies of your beloved men."

"Michael was right! You're nothing more than a liar. You deserve not my mercy...what you deserve is death! Everyone get out of here but Satan!" God demanded. Michael grinned at the devil and walked out happily. When the room was empty, God walked down the stairs. Satan closed his eyes and waited for the wrath to fall upon him... but as soon as God's shadow fell on him, he felt something familiar. He was in his arms. God whispered in his ear, "my dear Satan, long ago I found out about the ... of seven skies against man, but what could I do? It was just me and me. My only hope was you, and when you said you weren't going to obey me anymore I was lonelier that ever. I didn't know what to do with man, I couldn't leave him in the skies with all these jealous angels...so I made an excuse and sent him to Earth, until they get ready enough to get back to skies... my only worry is that they couldn't tolerate it...Either die because of their mistakes or kill each other in hatred."

Satan looked at God's face and read all these years' pressure and sadness in his eyes.

God hugged him tighter, "now there's one think I want from you my friend...Go back to Earth while I tell everyone you're dead, and guide my humans back to me. You are the only one who knows the truth... go and lead the way for them."

And so Satan went down back to Earth again...

Writing Feedback / Green Change - "cause and effect" essay [6]

Hello all. This is an essay i need to write for my english class. Its supposed to be a "cause and effect" essay. I'd be more than glad to hear your ideas and comments on it. (please ignore the caps. I'll get them fixed.) what i really need to know is: 1. does is flow nicely? 2. is the subject clear? 3. does it well inform you?

The Green Change

In my first months of living in the States, a classmate asked me where I had moved from. When I told her I was originally an Iranian, she put on a curious face on, and asked me whether it's true that we rode camels in Iran. "Actually I've never been close to a camel in my life." I replied, not knowing whether to take it as a joke or for serious. As the years went on, and I was asked the same type of questions and gave them same answers like "Yes, women can drive in Iran.", or "Yes, we can choose whom to marry.", and "No, we don't hate Americans." I was quite sure there was something seriously wrong here.

It's not surprising. That is how we've been pictured through decades by media: As terrorists, racist, uncivilized and violent people, and through all these years there has been no one to stand up for us, to make our voices heard and our true picture seen, but I always hoped, that one day someone will rise and change this ugly and false picture. No one ever did, until this last summer; It wasn't a person who rose, but it was a nation.

On June 13th 2009, as the results of Iran's presidential elections were announced to the public stating that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was re-elected, millions of angry voters who believed their votes to other presidential candidates were stolen took off to the streets to protest the results of the election. They called themselves The Greens, the color was a of Mir Hussain Musavi's campaign; a reformist presidential candidate who protesters believed to be the real president. Since that date the Green Movement has changed a lot of things: Besides troubling the regime, it has changed many of Iranians life style. As Ebrahim Nabavi, Iranian satirist and journalist, stated in his article What Happened to Whom?, published in roozonline magazine: "For thirty years Iranians were in their closets, refusing to come out and now it's been thirty days that they've come out, taking into streets, and they're absolutely refusing to go back in."

To this day, the change that The Green Movement's made has passed the geographic borders and it has changed the world. Not only inspiring people in other countries under dictatorship -such as China- but it has changed image of Iranians from terrorists, violent and uncivilized people to a nation who stands and fights for freedom and democracy using modern day techniques.

Iranian protesters were voted to be the Person of The Year in 2,422,345 votes in Time Magazine's 2009 poll; they were ranked first while the second leading person was Steve Jobs with 361,547 votes. "Their courage and determination in the face of a brutal government crackdown demonstrated the depth of their willingness to fight for what they believed in." Time explained.

Maz Jobrani, an Iraninan Comedian living in the States, revealed one of his personal encounters with this change: "A while ago, I got an email where I read that some kids in New York in protest of the way their principal was treating them decided to "go Iranian" on him; meaning the decided to stand up to him and demand their rights. That blew my mind, because as an Iranian kid grown up in America the term Iranian was never used in a positive way like that. It wasn't cool to be Iranian, you couldn't use the term Iranian as standing up to people.", he also added that "the movement has well showed the fact that Iranians want democracy and freedom just as much as any American citizen would want, it has opened a new sharing point for the two nation."

Maybe another point that needed to be corrected about Iran was how modern it really was. If America thinks of Iran as a deserted place with its people dressed in turbans and robes riding in camels, how can we expect it to make any connection or understanding toward Iran? Thankfully, The delusion of Iranians living in an uncivilized world and far from the modern technology was quite shattered as the Green Movement widely took advantage of Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, weblogs and of course cell phones. Iran election was a trending topic on twitter for almost a month. Tens of Facebook pages were created. Hundreds of videos of the protests shot by ordinary people using their cell phones spread on the YouTube overnight, and for the first time, Iranians had a way of showing their true self, without any censorship. It was a door open to Iranians to the world that was never even there before, an opportunity for them to show to the world that they were fighting for the same morals they were. "Iranians struggle for peace and freedom and strive for equality the same as Americans do, and due to the uprising people are becoming more aware of that reality" says Aarya Hashimi, a student in Bellevue College who was born and raised in America. He adds; "the uprising has showed Americans that Iranians aren't all what the media has made them up to be, they are actually real people with similar things such as peace and freedom in mind."

In the last six months a lot of non-Iranians have shown their supports for the protesters; by taking part in demonstrations, by signing petitions and even by making YouTube videos, blogging or twitting about it. "All of a sudden Iran is cool. You get people like U2 playing the bloody Sunday and dedicating it to Iran. Bonjovi, a guy out of New Jersey is singing in Farsi, and you're proud, you're proud to be Iranian. Then you realize a revolution has happened in the world" Maz Jobrani says in his YouTube video "last gasp".

I'm proud too, and very hopeful. This has been just a start -the first step in a long road, but it's been a good start. The Green Movement is young but it has already reached and touched many souls. These days the situation in Iran is getting more and more intense as the government is using more violence against the protesters. On the other hand the people, who now know the true power they hold, are more hopeful. What will happen in Iran's future, I don't know, but one thing is for sure: The world -or at least part of it- will never look at Iran as it did before.

Research Papers / comparison contrast essay: green movement and revolution of 1979 [NEW]

The Islamic Revolution of and the Green Movement of Iran: A comparison

Back in 1979, in Iran, no one thought a revolution would ever happen again; everyone thought that it was a happy and successful ending to a long fight against dictatorship. No one thought, thirty years later, history would repeat and the regime they fought for would itself become a new dictatorship, but it happened. In June, 2009 the Green movement rose up against the corrupt election to fight against the new dictatorship that was forming in the very same regime they once fought for.

In the inauguration of Mahmud Ahmadinejad, whose presidency is questioned by Iranian protesters, Ayatollah Khamenei, the supreme leader said that the green movement is a "Caricature of 1979 Islamic revolution". Not only is the green movement might not be as wide-spread as the one in 1979 yet, for it's very young, but certainly this young movement is not only a "Caricature" of the revolution of 1979, but it's modern and corrected version of it; people of Iran have learned their lesson in the last thirty years, and are not going to repeat the same mistakes that led the country to dictatorship of today.

Let's go back to 1979, when protests and mass demonstrations like today were very intense. A great number of people took part in demonstrations every time, some killed, some arrested; that unfortunately has not changed after thirty years, but the communications between the protesters certainly has. In 1979 they were facing a problem; they had to spread the news-bulletins that Khomeini published once in a while, and set the upcoming dates for demonstrations without being caught by governmental forces. Their only way of doing this was either by passing it person by person, or by throwing papers indicating time and date of the demonstration in their neighbors' houses. After all these plans and risks, there was only one thing to do, taking to the street. That was the only way to make their voices heard.

Now the new generation is creating new and even unique ways and techniques of protesting and spreading the news. Besides the widespread use of internet and social networking websites such as Facebook, Twitter and YouTube, Iranians have created more ways to make their voices heard and show their unity; they set all their cell phones on the same ringtone -the national song of Iran, they send out green balloons to the sky on specific days, they write slogans on walls, and as their most widespread act they "money-write".

Writing slogans, such as "Down with the dictator" or just a simple "V" as the sign of victory, on the paper currencies, started a month after the election to show the significant number of the protesters to the government and also to be an assurance of unity to the protesters. The "money-writing", as protesters call it, became so widespread by December 2009, that the government forced the Central Bank of Iran to ask all shops and market places to not accept any written paper currency and gave people an ultimatum to bring in their "old" and "scratched" money to banks and exchange them for new ones. The plan failed as people refused to exchange their money and salespeople still accept the "money-written" bills. The "money-written" currency still goes around, and people continue to either write or print slogans on the bills.

Although the Green movement has many unique characteristics, and has changed people's life styles, the most interesting of all is it's leadership. The leader of Revolution of 1979 was Ayatollah Khomenei. He was a powerful leader, yet only a charismatic one. People who shouted his name in the streets and held his pictures above their heads barely knew who this man was, what his ideas were and what he was planning to do. People trusted Khamenei because he was a religious figure. They needed someone to stand up for them and they didn't care as he opposed Shah.

The Green movement has a great and powerful leader as well. One that has a strong body, a loud voice, many good ideas, and who although he occasionally does make mistakes but manages to correct it immediately. This leader isn't anyone but the people themselves.

Mir Hussein Mousavi, who is believed to be the real president by the protesters, is only a representative of the movement. He and Mehdi Karoubi -another candidate- have published bulletins, stating their support to the protestors and calling for action, but they are only following the steps people are taking, as Mir Hussain stated in his last bulletin: "The real leaders of this movement are people who take into the street while no-one called for them." However to this day neither Mousavi nor Karoubi has left the protesters alone, people have learned not to completely trust and believe in anyone but themselves -not as their fathers did back in 1979.

The Green movement is the evolved version of the Islamic revolution . Both people and political leaders have learned their lessons from the past, and if the Islamic Republic is to ever catch up with this movement, it should learn it's lessons from history as well - which it's most important one is to stop using force and violence, for the history has shown it will only draw their end closer .

Scholarship / Scholarship essay: A personal Biography by Newsha born in Tehran, Iran [NEW]

Hi everyone,
This scholarship I'm applying to is due in about 6 hours. I would GREATLY appreciate anyone's help on this essay.

My name is Newsha. I was born on a summer afternoon in Tehran, Iran. Its 18 years later now, and I'm here, in Seattle, far by thousands of miles. What has brought me so far away from my birthplace? One thing: Hope.

Hope is what made my family fly over oceans and countries, let apart from our loved ones, and brought us here, to the United States. Hope is also the reason I'm here at Bellevue College, because I hope to become exceptional, and because I hope to follow my dreams as far as they go.

The road to where We're standing now hasn't been smooth at all. My parents have made great sacrifices for us, their children, so we could have more and better opportunities in our lives. I realize how big the sacrifices my parents have made for me are. I see my dad having to work overtime night after night, so he can keep up with our family's growing expenses. I also know how much they miss Iran, their homeland, but I also know that what keeps them going is hope; hopes of their children having a bright future. I know it's now upon my shoulders to carry their hopes and dreams. The future they've dreamed for me is shaping in my hands, right now, right here. My parent have given up their own dreams to build up mine, and I am not letting a sacrifice like that go to waste. Actually, I'm going to put in all my energy and time in living those hopes and dreams, and my parent's dreams and mine are both nothing but me reaching the highest levels of education.

I came to Bellevue College seeking this dream, because, considering my family's economical situation, I believed it was the best starting point for me. With two years in Bellevue College, not only I could save money, but I could get myself ready for entering the university. Stepping into a new era in my education, I made myself a promise. I promised myself to devote my time and energy to nothing but achieving the best I can, and I'm glad that so far I have kept this promise and I hope I will.

I have great hopes, and therefore I have great plans for my future. The journey that I have started a year ago at Bellevue College is not going to end soon, for I believe I need to go as far as I can see, and when I get there, I'll see furthur.