SadeAjayi
Dec 22, 2012
SadeAjayi
Dec 19, 2012
SadeAjayi
Dec 18, 2012
Undergraduate / Degree in Computer Science; Purdue Essay /Goals [4]
Please give me feedback. I don't think i answered the question properly.
Describe how you will use your Purdue education to achieve your personal and professional goals
I come from Nigeria, a country that in many ways still lags behind in the field of science and technology. Growing up, it was always interesting to see new and amazing technologies in western movies and television programmes years before they became available in my country. Whenever I travelled abroad during the summer holidays, I was simply awed how much more technology was available to the public in the developed world. Fewer people went to bookstores because it was easier to order books online. Cars had GPS systems so it was easy to get directions to any place. I thought to myself, "Wow! We really are behind in Nigeria. Our cars don't have cars with GPS systems and online shopping is not even an option."
I became inspired to want to help improve the technological state of my country. I knew that the path I took in life could have a huge positive impact on my country if I really wanted it to. I began to research into courses that might help me achieve my goals. That was how I discovered Computer Science. It is my dream to use a degree in Computer Science as a platform to revolutionize the technological state of my country. I believe being admitted to Purdue and being able to study computer science there would equip me with enough knowledge in my field as to take back home and do something with it.
In recent years, there has been a brain drain on my country. Young Nigerians have left the country to acquire skills in developed countries only to settle there due to the better quality of life they enjoy. If Nigeria is to move forward, it needs more skilled individuals who genuinely wish to utilize their talents so that progress. I believe that studying a major such as computing and information technology in Purdue's school of Engineering would put me in a position to help my country grow in different aspects- business, commerce, manufacturing, communication and transportation- and it is inspiring to think that mine and future generations could be better off for it.
Please give me feedback. I don't think i answered the question properly.
Describe how you will use your Purdue education to achieve your personal and professional goals
I come from Nigeria, a country that in many ways still lags behind in the field of science and technology. Growing up, it was always interesting to see new and amazing technologies in western movies and television programmes years before they became available in my country. Whenever I travelled abroad during the summer holidays, I was simply awed how much more technology was available to the public in the developed world. Fewer people went to bookstores because it was easier to order books online. Cars had GPS systems so it was easy to get directions to any place. I thought to myself, "Wow! We really are behind in Nigeria. Our cars don't have cars with GPS systems and online shopping is not even an option."
I became inspired to want to help improve the technological state of my country. I knew that the path I took in life could have a huge positive impact on my country if I really wanted it to. I began to research into courses that might help me achieve my goals. That was how I discovered Computer Science. It is my dream to use a degree in Computer Science as a platform to revolutionize the technological state of my country. I believe being admitted to Purdue and being able to study computer science there would equip me with enough knowledge in my field as to take back home and do something with it.
In recent years, there has been a brain drain on my country. Young Nigerians have left the country to acquire skills in developed countries only to settle there due to the better quality of life they enjoy. If Nigeria is to move forward, it needs more skilled individuals who genuinely wish to utilize their talents so that progress. I believe that studying a major such as computing and information technology in Purdue's school of Engineering would put me in a position to help my country grow in different aspects- business, commerce, manufacturing, communication and transportation- and it is inspiring to think that mine and future generations could be better off for it.
SadeAjayi
Dec 18, 2012
Undergraduate / Supplement Essay on the Development on My Interest on Computer Science [3]
Sorry,before i comment, what's the word limit to this?
Sorry,before i comment, what's the word limit to this?
SadeAjayi
Dec 15, 2012
Undergraduate / Lions village motherless babies home; Essay 2 [5]
Is this better?
About a year ago, some friends and I visited "Lions village motherless babies home," an orphanage owned and run by the government in my country, Nigeria.
At first I was reluctant to go, due to the conditions of state owned orphanages in my country. They suffer from poor maintenance, and the conditions under which the children live are quite simply appalling, to say the least. In the end it was my mother who convinced me to go with a short speech that went something like this, "Sade, just go. After all, all your friends are going. All those children want is to be loved. I do not see why the state of the orphanage should stop you from showing love to those kids". After pondering on my mother's words, I decided that visiting the orphanage with my friends was the right thing to do.
When we arrived there, we were led into a small bungalow where some of the children resided. One of the children in particular captured my interest. Her name was Funmi. Funmi's mother had abandoned her on the roadside shortly after she was born because she did not want her. When I looked into Funmi's pearly eyes, I was filled with compassion and warmth. I then began thinking to myself, "how could someone be so cruel as to abandon such an innocent, helpless child on the roadside?" This child was a gift, and neither she nor any of those other children deserved to be abandoned the way they were.
While the conditions at the orphanage were just as unfavourable as I expected them to be, that all paled in comparison to the way I felt when I actually came into contact with the people who it was really all about, the orphans. This experience was definitely an eye-opener for me because it made me more appreciative of all the love and support I have around me. I am happy I listened to my mother and went with my friends to the orphanage. I will never forget the lesson I learnt from my trip to Lions Village motherless babies home.
Is this better?
About a year ago, some friends and I visited "Lions village motherless babies home," an orphanage owned and run by the government in my country, Nigeria.
At first I was reluctant to go, due to the conditions of state owned orphanages in my country. They suffer from poor maintenance, and the conditions under which the children live are quite simply appalling, to say the least. In the end it was my mother who convinced me to go with a short speech that went something like this, "Sade, just go. After all, all your friends are going. All those children want is to be loved. I do not see why the state of the orphanage should stop you from showing love to those kids". After pondering on my mother's words, I decided that visiting the orphanage with my friends was the right thing to do.
When we arrived there, we were led into a small bungalow where some of the children resided. One of the children in particular captured my interest. Her name was Funmi. Funmi's mother had abandoned her on the roadside shortly after she was born because she did not want her. When I looked into Funmi's pearly eyes, I was filled with compassion and warmth. I then began thinking to myself, "how could someone be so cruel as to abandon such an innocent, helpless child on the roadside?" This child was a gift, and neither she nor any of those other children deserved to be abandoned the way they were.
While the conditions at the orphanage were just as unfavourable as I expected them to be, that all paled in comparison to the way I felt when I actually came into contact with the people who it was really all about, the orphans. This experience was definitely an eye-opener for me because it made me more appreciative of all the love and support I have around me. I am happy I listened to my mother and went with my friends to the orphanage. I will never forget the lesson I learnt from my trip to Lions Village motherless babies home.
SadeAjayi
Dec 12, 2012
Undergraduate / Lions village motherless babies home; Essay 2 [5]
In an essay of 300 words or less, tell us something about yourself that isn't covered elsewhere in this application, some interest or experience of yours that you think the University of Illinois should know about as part of the admissions review.
I didn't really know what to write for this essay, so one can tell that my thoughts are all over the place from reading it. The conclusion isn't strong either. Please give me feedback and help me out. Thanks
A year ago, my school friends and I visited a motherless Babies home called "Lions village motherless babies home" owned by the government.
Honestly, I was a little bit reluctant to go because in Nigeria where I live, most orphanages owned by the government are not well kept, the children are not well fed, and the environment in which they live in is not conducive at all. The only reason I ended up going was because my mother said to me "Sade, just go. After all, all your friends are going. All those children want is to be loved. I don't see why the state of the orphanage should stop you from showing love to those kids". After listening to what my mum said, I decided to visit the orphanage with my friends.
When my school bus arrived at Lions Village, the environment was as bad as I expected but nevertheless, it didn't bother me much. We were then led into the small bungalow to say hello to the orphans. There was one infant in particular who I seemed to take interest in. Her name was Funmi. Funmi was abandoned by her mum by the roadside after she was born because her mother didn't want her anymore. When I looked into Funmi's pearly eyes, I was filled with compassion, and I got a sudden shiver all over my body. I then began thinking to myself "how could someone be so cruel enough to abandon a child so delicate, and so divine next to a gutter? Why?". Looking into the eyes of this baby alone warmed my heart to the point of tearing up. This child was a gift, and Funmi or any of those children in there did not deserve to be where they were. They each had stories which gripped my heart and made me think deeply. Being there alone for these kids and just holding their hands meant everything to them.
This experience was an eye-opener because it made me grateful for the amazing parents I have, and made me realise how blessed and privileged I truly am because, It's funny how, as I got involved in knowing these children, the unconducive environment they were in, or the state of the orphanage did not even come across my mind, neither did it bother me. It wasn't even my main focus anymore.
In an essay of 300 words or less, tell us something about yourself that isn't covered elsewhere in this application, some interest or experience of yours that you think the University of Illinois should know about as part of the admissions review.
I didn't really know what to write for this essay, so one can tell that my thoughts are all over the place from reading it. The conclusion isn't strong either. Please give me feedback and help me out. Thanks
A year ago, my school friends and I visited a motherless Babies home called "Lions village motherless babies home" owned by the government.
Honestly, I was a little bit reluctant to go because in Nigeria where I live, most orphanages owned by the government are not well kept, the children are not well fed, and the environment in which they live in is not conducive at all. The only reason I ended up going was because my mother said to me "Sade, just go. After all, all your friends are going. All those children want is to be loved. I don't see why the state of the orphanage should stop you from showing love to those kids". After listening to what my mum said, I decided to visit the orphanage with my friends.
When my school bus arrived at Lions Village, the environment was as bad as I expected but nevertheless, it didn't bother me much. We were then led into the small bungalow to say hello to the orphans. There was one infant in particular who I seemed to take interest in. Her name was Funmi. Funmi was abandoned by her mum by the roadside after she was born because her mother didn't want her anymore. When I looked into Funmi's pearly eyes, I was filled with compassion, and I got a sudden shiver all over my body. I then began thinking to myself "how could someone be so cruel enough to abandon a child so delicate, and so divine next to a gutter? Why?". Looking into the eyes of this baby alone warmed my heart to the point of tearing up. This child was a gift, and Funmi or any of those children in there did not deserve to be where they were. They each had stories which gripped my heart and made me think deeply. Being there alone for these kids and just holding their hands meant everything to them.
This experience was an eye-opener because it made me grateful for the amazing parents I have, and made me realise how blessed and privileged I truly am because, It's funny how, as I got involved in knowing these children, the unconducive environment they were in, or the state of the orphanage did not even come across my mind, neither did it bother me. It wasn't even my main focus anymore.
SadeAjayi
Dec 12, 2012
Undergraduate / Harvard commonapp supplement essays- about use of education [8]
Well written essay. I like how everything is coherent and how it flows
It shows how passionate you are about what you wanna study. I think you should submit this,al
Well written essay. I like how everything is coherent and how it flows
It shows how passionate you are about what you wanna study. I think you should submit this,al
SadeAjayi
Dec 12, 2012
Undergraduate / the every-weekend movie show - UIUC prompt # 2 [2]
Brilliant essay in general. Btw on the first line, it should be "Being a secretary meant ..."not means, because it was past tense
Since you want it shorter, the part where you said "and then had two-hour free time to take a shower or wash clothes" is irrelevant. I suggest you remove it
also remove the sentence where you said "Infact, this way can even be called as infinitesimal" i don't understand that part or why it's there
Brilliant essay in general. Btw on the first line, it should be "Being a secretary meant ..."not means, because it was past tense
Since you want it shorter, the part where you said "and then had two-hour free time to take a shower or wash clothes" is irrelevant. I suggest you remove it
also remove the sentence where you said "Infact, this way can even be called as infinitesimal" i don't understand that part or why it's there
SadeAjayi
Dec 8, 2012
Undergraduate / Nigeria needs to go with the flow of the tide:Illinois Urbana Champaign essay [4]
Thank you for the feedback. Yes i still live in Nigeria.
The point about helping the country using computer science.
My point basically is that since the country is lagging behind in terms of technological advancements, it needs people who have studied courses related to it to help the country, and these people would be employed in different industries and will help these industries with their knowledge of IT. For example, since bookstores are closing down, you would need someone to start up a website for your bookstore where people can order books online because that hasn't been done efficiently in this part of the world.
What i mean by making work easier is, if a computer engineer/scientist decides to work with a car manufacturing company in Nigeria here for example Toyota, they can use their idea of robotics to replace labour in these industries with capital, thus lowering costs and making manufacturing work even faster.
I don't know if you get what i mean now, but that's what i was trying to say, although i didnt know how to sum it up properly in the essay
Thank you for the feedback. Yes i still live in Nigeria.
The point about helping the country using computer science.
My point basically is that since the country is lagging behind in terms of technological advancements, it needs people who have studied courses related to it to help the country, and these people would be employed in different industries and will help these industries with their knowledge of IT. For example, since bookstores are closing down, you would need someone to start up a website for your bookstore where people can order books online because that hasn't been done efficiently in this part of the world.
What i mean by making work easier is, if a computer engineer/scientist decides to work with a car manufacturing company in Nigeria here for example Toyota, they can use their idea of robotics to replace labour in these industries with capital, thus lowering costs and making manufacturing work even faster.
I don't know if you get what i mean now, but that's what i was trying to say, although i didnt know how to sum it up properly in the essay
SadeAjayi
Dec 8, 2012
Undergraduate / Nigeria needs to go with the flow of the tide:Illinois Urbana Champaign essay [4]
In an essay of 300 words or less, please describe how your past circumstances and experiences (such as your upbringing, community, and/or activities) impacted who you are, your future goals, and your choice of major. If you haven't decided on a college or major yet, briefly explain your intentions and aspirations for your first year at Illinois.
Having been up in Nigeria; a developing country still at its ebb of technological developments, anyone could notice that the country was and still is aback in terms of advancements in technology. Majority of the industries here are still labour than capital-intensive.
Whenever I travelled to other countries like England or America during the summer holidays, I noticed that fewer people went to bookshops because it was easier to order books online, anytime I was too lazy to go shopping at the mall, I could shop online instead, cars had GPS systems so it was easy to get directions to anywhere, and I thought to myself "Wow!, we really are lagging behind in Nigeria because we don't have cars with GPS navigation, and online shopping isn't even reliable over there. So many things don't work in Nigeria. We need more computer scientists and engineers here".
The world as we know it has become one global village, and I think Nigeria needs to go with the flow of the tide. This is one reason why I feel studying computer science in Illinois will help me achieve this goal. I believe my passion for computing and information technology would help Nigeria grow in different aspects- commerce, business, car and manufacturing industries- and would make work more efficient and easier.
Please give me feedback on this essay.
In an essay of 300 words or less, please describe how your past circumstances and experiences (such as your upbringing, community, and/or activities) impacted who you are, your future goals, and your choice of major. If you haven't decided on a college or major yet, briefly explain your intentions and aspirations for your first year at Illinois.
Having been up in Nigeria; a developing country still at its ebb of technological developments, anyone could notice that the country was and still is aback in terms of advancements in technology. Majority of the industries here are still labour than capital-intensive.
Whenever I travelled to other countries like England or America during the summer holidays, I noticed that fewer people went to bookshops because it was easier to order books online, anytime I was too lazy to go shopping at the mall, I could shop online instead, cars had GPS systems so it was easy to get directions to anywhere, and I thought to myself "Wow!, we really are lagging behind in Nigeria because we don't have cars with GPS navigation, and online shopping isn't even reliable over there. So many things don't work in Nigeria. We need more computer scientists and engineers here".
The world as we know it has become one global village, and I think Nigeria needs to go with the flow of the tide. This is one reason why I feel studying computer science in Illinois will help me achieve this goal. I believe my passion for computing and information technology would help Nigeria grow in different aspects- commerce, business, car and manufacturing industries- and would make work more efficient and easier.
Please give me feedback on this essay.
