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Posts by 600score
Joined: Sep 9, 2013
Last Post: Nov 26, 2013
Threads: 3
Posts: 4  

From: United States of America

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600score   
Nov 26, 2013
Writing Feedback / Telling truth has been a debatable issue among people from the past till now [2]

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.please help me refine my essay.

Telling truth has been a debatable issue among people from the past till now. Sometimes, there is a situation that people prefer to lie or hide the truth. They justify themselves that telling truth is not only appropriate and reasonable but it makes problem occasionally. Nevertheless something former is said, in my opinion, it is very important that people tell truth to each other in any relationship they have.

To begin with, I believe in no lie between friends is very helpful to friendship. It is common among People tell some white lie to their friends avoid making them sad. They think that if they tell truth, their friends become upset and their friendship goes on ruin. For example, brad desires to be an actor but he has no gift in acting. His dream is not accordance to his talent. But his friends because of satisfying him tell him lie. They give him compliment. As a result, brad thinks that he acts excellently and can be a successful actor. He becomes ambitious and destroys his opportunities.

Second, truth make people rely on each other. Believe or not, lie builds a wall of separation among people. For instance, in advertisement, if a company tells lie to people and promotes a product in a tricky way, after that people do not buy its product. This company obtains a negative reputation among people and goes to a wrong direction.

In addition, it is everybody's right to know the truth. May be people hide truth to keep their friendships well, but their friends will know the truth eventually. After it happens, they blame them for not telling truth.

Finally, it can be said telling truth has a significant role in any relationship between people. People with telling truth can rely on each other. This makes their relationships steady and secure.
600score   
Nov 24, 2013
Writing Feedback / Sports & Social Activities are just as important as Classes- Equal financial support! [3]

At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
please help me refine my essay.

Universities and colleges play significant role in students' life. These educational institutes not only provide educational facilities like classes and libraries, but must improve students' abilities in social and sports fields. In my opinion, it is their responsibility to support financially non-educational aspects as well as educational aspects.

First, nowadays an all-rounder person has great status in society. Students must be learn their own fields sufficiently, also foster their social skills, Athletic abilities and etc. all these competences make them take up a good job and are satisfied in their lives. For example, a successful manager is a person who is able to have doing well social interactions and ability for dealing with difficulties; these are proficiency that come from his experiences in real life. In contract, a manager that just studies management and does not have any social activity fails to obtain a good situation as a career.

Second, there is a Persian idiom that says" a well mind is in a healthy body." A good sport activity plan is necessary for students. They must contribute in sport activities, compete with each other, have a happy time and become more familiar with together. It is clear that in a solid and strict atmosphere like universities and colleges, a recreation plan such as sport activities, make a good balance for students. For instance, a student who is good in track and field learns to be more resistant and agile in studying than a student just peruses educational goals and does not pay attention to his physical activities.

Finally, it can be said that every society needs person who is well brought up his genius, has different abilities to deal with problems in his career and also in his life. Universities and colleges with providing opportunities for improving young people's abilities in all fields, take an important step.
600score   
Sep 9, 2013
Writing Feedback / GRE: Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern [2]

Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a "Palean" basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.

The author established a connection between woven baskets and Palean people. It assumed that evidence for proving woven baskets do not belong to Palea uniquely, are sufficient and convincing. Conversely there are lacks of evidence for this argument that support its point.

First of all, it must be considered over time the brim river depth or its broadness maybe has changed. It is possible the brim river was being as deep as Palean people could have crossed the Brim river without needing to boats. Hence, according to point that no Palean boats have been found, we do not wish to agree with the author. In addition, maybe Palean people were being proficient swimmers and could have swum from Palea to Litthos simply by themselves.

Other point that is debatable, it is ambiguous statement "archaeologists have found no Palean boats." There are some possibilities because of material vulnerability that are used in boats structure, boats are destroyed over time and there is no vestige of them now. Also, archaeologists have not found any Palean boats maybe Palean people have used others boats, for examples boats made by Lithos people.

Finally, Paleans could have traded with people of Lithos, they used woven baskets for carrying own products. Therefore, such a "Palean" basket is discovered in Lithos.

In conclusion, the author did not bring in adequate evidence that could be support its claim. In other words, Exiting evidence is not cogent. If author could be able to strengthen own assertion by sufficient evidence, we can concur to him/her.