Undergraduate / My trip to Sandy Island - group experience and role in it [4]

Q: Describe your most significant group work experience including the role you played and your contributions.

A: The trip to Sandy Island was my most significant group experience. During my time at Quadra cadet camp, I was required to pass a harsh survival course along with 24 other cadets, which was to spend a night on the inhibited island called Sandy Island. From afar, it looked like a dessert with evergreen trees sprouting from the middle like lava spewing from a volcano. We anchored our sailboat after a 4 hour long row, and we jumped into the water, forming a line to the shore. After we delivered our supplies onto the shore, using the assembly line technique, we opened up the tent bags and stared at each other. None of us had ever set up a tent before, much less a large ten person tent. I scrolled up my sleeves and suggested that we start by looking at the instructions provided. After reading the instructions, I explained to them that we had to spread out the tent first. With that said, I took a corner and started pulling outwards. I encouraged the others to follow my lead, and with the help of 10 others, we barely managed to finish setting up our first tent. Looking at the other four tents, the others sighed. We huddled up and decided that each tent would need the labour of 6 cadets. Without the contribution from each one of us, we would have had to spend the night sleeping on the sand with the cold ocean breeze caressing our cheeks.

Can you please tell me if I answered the question fully. I didn't list out my role and contributions but I hinted it in the paragraph...Is it easy to follow,

Also, is the topic relevant to the question!

Undergraduate / "Attention! Don't move! Eyes to the front!" ; My significant leadership role [2]

Q: Describe your most significant leadership experience. Why do you consider this your most significant role?

A: "Attention! Don't move! Eyes to the front!" These catchy phrases can normally be heard echoing though the large gymnasium building, the base for Captain Rankin and Vancouver. Being a PO1 (Petty Officer First Class) in cadets was, by far, one of my most significant leadership role. I had to stand in front of a division of cadets to direct them through parades and opening ceremonies and I was responsible for holding a class each week. I taught them how to treat broken arms, dislocated collar bones, and how to build a shelter in the woods from scratch. Many of the younger cadets looked up to me and went to me for tips on how to polish your boots, iron your clothes, and become a better public speaker with a loud and clear voice. This was a very significant leadership experience for me because I learned how to manage crowds of people, plan for classes and events, and also how to get my point clearly across to my listeners. I worked alongside officers and other cadets who had amazing leadership skills and I was able to learn from the best. I studied how they confidently walk across the room with their heads held high and how they treat each and every cadet the same and was able to learn and mimic their great skills. Through being a cadet, I learned and developed many important life skills, such as effective communication skills, organization and time management, and self-confidence.

Can you please help me correct any grammar problems and also see if I stayed on topic and answered the Why do you consider this your most significant role part?

THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!

Undergraduate / Significant Challenge, and your response to it; 'dream of becoming a pianist' [2]

Q: Explain how you responded to a significant challenge that you have encountered and what you learned in the process. Max. 250 words

A:
At the tender and late age of 10, after seeing a pianist's nimble hands dancing merrily across a sea of black and white keys, I was hit right in the head with a dream of becoming a pianist. From that time onwards, I began to fervently practice my piano. I took my Grade 8 exam in August 2012, after 5 years of piano playing, but I was faced with a crisis. I only had 2 years left to finish my piano exams before I graduated. Many of my cousins graduated high school with a grade 8 or 9 piano, but once they started to attend university, they stopped playing it, letting all those years of hard work go to waste. My teacher suggested a solution to the problem; skipping grade 9 and directly going to grade 10. I signed up for the Grade 10 piano exam in August 2013 and was put under a major deadline. Along with taking my piano exam, I also had 2 summer school completion courses, and a part time job. Even though I was on a tight schedule, I continued to practice 3 hours each day. In the end, I managed to get 85% on my piano exam which is very high, considering that I skipped grade 9 and only learned for a year. Through this impossible challenge, I learned that with hard work and determination, you can achieve your goals and dreams, even though you are far behind from others in your skills.

Can you guys please help me proof read this and give some suggestions on improvement?