Writing Feedback / Tools to attract people to work. [6]

please help me to correct my essay,i want to deliver this essay to my english language teacher. thank you in advance.

Subject:
Some people argue that government should give every unemployed person a mobile phone and should make sure they access to internet. They believe this is the best way of using public money to reduce the problem of unemployment.

Of course governments in each country want to reduce unemployment and develop their economic situation by different plans. They suggest lots of program for a period of years and try to perform the plans and see how these managements effect on unemployment, by observing statistics. Writing about this subject and explain that how these kinds of plans can have helpful effect on unemployment is a little specialized, and need right statistics to understand how these scheme reduce the people who are out of working, but I try to explain my general knowledge and explain my observation about this, to see "is these plans helpful or no?" if I want to develop my speech I should divide the countries to two groups, developed and under developed countries. The plans of reducing unemployment problems are quite different in these two groups.

In developed countries the problem of unemployment do not related to lack of jobs, most problem belong to quality of jobs and the ability of persons who want to do these jobs, because of this managers and industries owners try to give people lots of privileges such as mobile phone and internet access to encourage population to work for them and employ enough power of working for themselves., and they can find more active staff. In addition of attractive effect of these privileges, governments improve the knowledge of workers by letting them to use internet network.

In most of under developed countries there is not enough vacant jobs for youngmen, so bosses or managers have enough power of workers and cause of this they do not spend more money to offer to employers. In these countries government just try to make new job's opportunity to reduce unemployed people without any more privileges. Having a good income with a suitable going and returning facilities are the best benefits that these governments can offer to people who are out of working.

Thus, depends of that the countries are in which level of economics situation and what percentage of population are unemployed, they choose different ways to lessen unemployment by using public money. Some more strong countries offer mobile and internet access to attract people to work and some poorer countries do this just by offering theme good going and returning facilities. In my opinion all benefits that governments give to workers are necessary, because governments can use the advantages as tools to attract more employers or letting them to improve their knowledge by benefits such as internet access.

Writing Feedback / Too much rules are useful or not? [6]

thanks in advanced who will help me to repair my essay.english is my second language.

Subject:
Governments make rules to protect people from danger for example by making people wear seatbelt in cars or not allowing smoking in public buildings, however many people believe there are too many rules nowadays.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?
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From when people decided to live with together as specific societies for living morw comfortable they legislated lows. The rules that they have to accept all and be respectful to them. Some of the rules become as lows that performed just in a tribe or maybe performed in bigger societies such as province or bigger and bigger in countries and in the biggest form, all people in all countries accept some of the rules, and in consequence these rules become international. These rules signed with the president of all countries in united nations that means the people of those countries select president as a representative of themselves to accept international rules. There are some other rules that are useful in most of countries, although these rules are not international but most of the countries accept them as rules ( like prohibiting smoking in public places ) it's reason is that , there are enough justification to prohibiting these behaviors. At the end there some rules that they useful just for specific nations, and these rules are different in all nations. I think the contrasts between these rules refer to the differences of nation's cultures. In this paper firstly I will write about common rules that lots of nations believe on them, and after that I will write about some local special rules that just are performed in a country or maybe a province.

First
After world war II all countries decided to legislate some rules to prevent of a new war and be respectful to some rules to prevent to form new dictatorial governments. These rules legislated in united-nations and all countries believe them. For example I can say some of them : Human's right, that say people in all over the world in all nations and in all colors or in all class of economic situations have these followed rights such as, general freedom, freedom in religion, freedom in speak about viewpoints and etc... All countries sign this agreement. These were some instances of human's rights that all nations believe on them, however I mentioned that there are some rules that are not signed in united-nations but lots of countries perform because of the benefits of these rules, most of the countries accept them as rules, like lots of rules in driving cars such as speed limits or fastening seatbelt or forbidden smoking in public places. These things that I said are primary and necessary rules, should be performed to improve the comfortableness in people's life. I think these kinds of rules are useful and vital.

For the second I will write about local rules that are useful just for a special province and if these rules been performed in other society with different culture and behavior maybe make people uncomfortable. For instances in some central American countries smoking grasses are free, of course in lots of countries usage of addiction materials are forbidden, we can recognize that these rules are just useful locally. For another example I can mention about the alcoholic drinking in public places, that is forbidden in lots of Muslim countries, but in rest of the countries usage of these kinds of drinking is popular and free, you can see this rule refers to religion, if these rules change in these countries, absolutely suffer a big group of people.

In consequence if I want to answer the subject's question, I should say that rules are necessary for modern life and can improve the convenient of people's life. It is better to say that benefits of the rules are more than their hardship that these rules make for us. We could understand that rules divided in two groups: international an local rules. Both of these are useful and important and if somebody goes somewhere, the rules are different he/she should be respectful to local rules of that place, as the same this English idiom says: " when in Rome do as Romans do "

Writing Feedback / Tv's influences on culture... who can help me to correct this essay? [9]

Subject:
In many countries television shows many foreign made programmes.
The dominance of imported entertainment is harmful to the culture of these countries.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

From the first of mankind humans tried to make connection with each other and with the future humans. Speaking , painting on cave's wall or using the smoke of the fire are some instances. They tried to paint on the cave's wall to leave their experiences or maybe customs for future humans generation. These examples show having connection for humans were so necessary and vital. Scientist argue that the most important h=thing can protect a generation was having connection with the last generation an use their experience for living better and more convenient. Naturally through the improvement of mankind the way of connection improved also. Radio was the first modernized electronic facility. In these contemporary years Tvs take radio place instead of that; then satellite then internet and etc... these facilities made a revolution people's life. In addition of benefits that connectors facilities can have for people they can be harmful for them too. I will divide the influence of connectors like Tvs to bad an good and write about them.

First bad influence
Governments usually use the media such as Tvs to generate false news to get public support. The news often are negative and pessimistic. These false news can be produced by foreigner and local governments. Countries usually try to export their culture to other countries by producing cartoons for kids and movies for the rest of people. Sometimes these cartoons have a awful influence on kids mind because of differences between culture and lead to ruin kid's mind. The movies have it's unconscious special effect on elder too.

Second I will write about the benefits of media such as Tvs. Television today has a lot of positive effect influence on our society. Tv gives up helpful information and keeps us informed with plenty of information such as weather predict or road's condition or etc...

Tv in today society has become one of the most basic resources of information. We are informed through the Tv of lasted news.Tv can be an instrument to improve our general knowledge and an eye in to the world around us.

In consequence we can result effect of Tv programmes can be both good and bad. This statement is right for foreign-made programmes too. Today there is a general agreement that filtering some of the Tv global programmes of satellite can be helpful for protect the kids of some bad influences. This filtering should be done by parents. I think kids internet access is as important as Tv's programmes are.parents should supervise about it too. Of course against the filtering parents should encourage their children to watch and work with useful channels or internet sites.