Scholarship / Wanting make a change by revolutionizing the aerospace industry [2]

Hello Essay Forum family, I hope you are all well and getting ready to start school wherever you are. The following essay is for a scholarship in the STEM fields, that is, science, technology, engineering, and math. This is my very first draft, and I would appreciate it if you could take time to leave feedback. Thank you!!!! :-)

In 1000 words or less, please answer the following questions:
How did you become interested in the STEM fields? How do these fields fit into your future plans and goals?
What actions do you plan to take to evolve the sectors of technology and science once you graduate?
What is one of your favorite emerging technologies? How do you see that technology evolving over the upcoming years?
What life experiences have shaped who you are today, and what challenges have you overcome in your education?

As you can see, this is a four-part question. I decided to write a complete essay connecting each idea and question into a story. Below, you will see in bold the areas where I addressed each question.

Memories often fade away, storing themselves in our heads, waiting to be triggered once again. As I write this essay, I dig deep in my childhood memories, looking for specific moments where my passion for math, science, and exploration began. One of those moments was in Pre-K at Taller Infantil Quiroga in Bogota, Colombia. My professor, Rose-Mery, has assigned us multiplication problems. I had the knack for these kinds of problems, often finishing and getting in trouble for not having anything else to do. Years later, when I turned 12, my mother decided to move to the United States in search of a better life. I boarded my very first airplane, which would fly us to Florida. Instantly, I fell in love with the big flying vessel, curious to know how it worked. Never would I have thought that my life would be dedicated to the aerospace world. Growing up in the United States has brought its challenges, but with my persistent and perseverant sense of self, I have overcome each obstacle, where I now dream of making a change in the world by revolutionizing the aerospace industry.

One of the greatest challenges I have endured dates back to May of 2009, the month of my high school graduation. I had already learned responsibility at the age of 14 by helping my mother with her cleaning business at night and also by working at the mall as a sales clerk whilst going to school. Also, I fell in love with college; during my last year in high school, I joined a dual-enrollment program that allowed me to go to college while in high school. However, on that evening in the beginning of May, our immigration lawyer called and told my mother that our petition for permanent residency would be on hold for three of more years. This impeded me from continuing to study in college. I cried that night to sleep, and with a broken heart, my dream of going to college seemed impossible.

The next four years were a time of growth for me. I left my childhood home in search of myself and what I was set out to do in the world. I worked several jobs, and at one point, I worked as a server, hotel manager, and front desk clerk simultaneously. Being employed continue to give me responsibility. It also prepared me with leadership skills, but I always kept dreaming of going to school someday, often telling people I was going to start school "next semester," uncertain of that truth. My permanent resident card arrived in the morning of July 15, 2013, more than four years after my high school graduation. Without hesitation, I applied to continue my Associate's Degree at Broward College. From my first day until graduation, I made school my main priority, gained A's in all of my courses, made close relationships with every professor, and I inspired students to dream bigger, teaching them the rewards of hard work and how nothing is impossible.

My passion for STEM also intensified during college, leading me to pursue a career as an aerospace engineer. I turned to space exploration and rocketry, one of my favorite emerging technologies. I spent my time in college studying, but I also dedicated my free time to investigating the advances of SpaceX and their landing rocket. Not only have they discovered how to reduce the total cost of a rocket's production, but these rockets serve for a higher purpose. They take satellites and humans to space to perform research aboard the ISS, research that benefits us humans here on Earth. As an example, Kate Rubins is aboard the station studying the microbiome, a bacteria in charge of our emotions and ability to fight off diseases. In the next few years, I see better and faster rockets, and I hope to be a part of this progress by shaping the next generation, our youth.

The week before my graduation from Broward College, I received my acceptance letter to Georgia Institute of Technology's School of Aerospace Engineering. One of the reasons why I got accepted is because of my admission essay, where I expressed interest in both space exploration and propulsion technology. Sadly, it is still a sector that needs improvement in performance and safety. The time it takes to travel to Mars would be over a year for a roundtrip flight. Astronauts will have to spend a year suffering from the effects of microgravity and radiation. If we had a set base in Mars, would need a faster spacecraft to take us there. My plan while as an undergrad at Georgia Tech is to get involved in research with faculty working on propulsion. This will prepare me to go to a Master's program and to grad school, where I will continue my research in advancing this technology, where space travel will become a vital part of our lives.

Memories are hidden treasure that can haunt us or benefit us; I chose the latter. When that kid boarded the Boeing-767, his heart ignited making him question and wonder. That boy still exists today as a grown 25-year-old. Although I had a difficult time getting to where I am today, I wouldn't trade any of my experiences for any other. As my life continues to unfold, I realize that there are no limits as to what I can achieve in my life. With my determination and ability to solve problems, I know I will contribute to the advancement of the space industry, and as a boomerang effect, benefitting people on Earth, both old and young, and the next generation of world-leaders.

Scholarship / I learned that success was collective, not personal. [3]

Hello Essay Forum team.

I hope this finds you all well. I need your expert advice on the following essay. Someone in my university found this scholarship for me and wants me to turn it in in the next two days. I did not have time to write a perfect essay, as I am busy preparing for the beginning of classes. But I hope you can help me with this one.

Please let me know if you like it or not, and if it addressed each question. Thank you!

In 500 words or less, discuss your personal attributes that speak to your perseverance while enrolled in your STEM program, a time when you exhibited the characteristics of a leader and your commitment to service.

It was now July 14, 2013, more than four years since my high school graduation. I opened my mailbox and an envelope that had my permanent resident card lay inside. I stood there in awe, jumping and crying as I held the card with my hands. "I can go to college!" I said. The next day, I drove to Broward College and applied to begin my Associate's Degree. Attending college has been a vital part of my life. With my perseverant sense of self, I helped students who struggled in math, and I inspired them to dream bigger.

The need to help others began when I met Andrea. She had a hard time understanding the material in our pre-calculus algebra class. Even though I worked full-time, I took time out of my schedule to help her. We studied after class every week, and I taught her my tricks to understanding abstract math concepts. These meetings not only helped her succeed in the class, but they also helped me since I had been out of school for so long. At the end of the semester, we both received an A in the class. This was the beginning of something great: the formation of "The Calculus Team."

Similarly, I began meeting other students who had difficulty with math and higher-level calculus classes. I made it my mission to lead the team and reach out to students who were having trouble in their classes. By the end of the calculus sequence, Differential Equations, our group grew to eight members. I scheduled meetings and got people to focus during study time. Edward Sanchez once came to me an hour before a major test and confessed he had not studied the night before. I quickly got my study sheet out and began practicing questions with him, helping him remember the course material he had forgotten. Why did I do this? My success meant the success of the group as whole, not just myself.

We had a set routine, where we would study every night after class, staying at the library until it closed. We also came in on Sundays to study before a major test. We competed with one another: whoever received the highest score in a test, received free lunch after a major exam. Edward, Tasnim, Da, Khang, Matt, Eddie, Michael, and I, were now the top students in all of our math courses. We were limitless, and our grades demonstrated our determination, and desire to succeed.

The arrival of my permanent resident card gave me hope. It gave me the opportunity to learn and teach others. With "The Calculus Team" at Broward College, I discovered I had the qualities of a leader and also the ability to inspire others. However, the most important thing I learned while in college was that success meant the collective success rather than a personal one. Now that I am at Georgia Tech, I hope to continue inspiring students, similarly as I did at BC with my hunger and desire to succeed. I want to continue

Undergraduate / A support system to succeed at Georgia Tech [2]

[b]Hello everyone. I am glad to be back here with you guys. I am applying to a Georgia Tech program that helps underrepresented students. I would like your input on the essay. I appreciate it!

Contributing to the P2P Program

When I stepped inside of Georgia Tech's campus back in July of 2016, I knew there was something special about this place. However, I had doubts whether to attend GT both for coming from a low-income background and for being a first generation student. Yet, I took the chance and accepted to attend. Joining the P2P program will help me succeed at Tech by acting as a support system to help me reach my goals, and similarly, with my sense of helping others and the "never give up" attitude, I hope to contribute back to the program.

My first semester at GT was very challenging for me. Adjusting to the new environment, the more rigorous course load, and being away from home were factors that made me think of giving up, but I never did. With the help of Jorge Breton from the Office of Hispanic Initiatives and Beatriz Rodriguez from the Center of Academic Success, I succeeded in my first semester. They both provided me with moral support, vital advice, and helped me plan my study schedule to develop better study habits. The truth is, I cannot do this alone. I need a home and a place where I can go whenever I am struggling, a support system like the one both Jorge and Beatriz offered me. The P2P program will be that support system.

I can now focus on my dreams and goals and what waits for me in the future. I want to continue my career at GT, taking advantage of all the opportunities that the school offers, from internships and co-op experiences, to study abroad and research programs. Having a mentor who can guide me in the right direction will help me make these experiences possible. My main goal is to work alongside a research professor that is working towards the advancement of propulsion technology, combined with the pursuit of finding life beyond Earth. Lastly, this goal in my career is so that I can continue my studies onto the graduate level.

How will I contribute to the P2P Program? By becoming a mentor and helping other incoming transfer students. I want to be a guide for them and provide them with the same support that others gave me this semester, to be there for them whenever they are thinking of giving up. I also wish to volunteer in communities and inspire students in any education level, encouraging them to seek higher education by sharing my story of how education changed my life.

Now that the semester is over, I no longer have doubts to being a Georgia Tech student. I realize that having a support system is imperative to my growth as a student and someone who wants to pursue graduate level education. I want to make the best of my time here, and the P2P program will allow me give back and inspire the next student that steps inside Georgia Tech for the first time.