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Posts by hirani03
Name: HIKUMA HIRANI
Joined: Aug 14, 2016
Last Post: Oct 27, 2016
Threads: 36
Posts: 50  
Likes: 5
From: Indonesia
School: Smart ILC

Displayed posts: 86 / page 3 of 3
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hirani03   
Aug 15, 2016
Writing Feedback / Peripheral Vision in Sports (Summary) [2]

Hi swr10, I have read your summary. I try to give you some feedback. Feel free to discuss. :)

1. Peripheral vision mentionmentions to what we discern ...
2. Athletes, for example, must be eagerly conscious of what is occuringoccurring on all sides themtheir sides .
3. Each peripherallyperipheral observed gesticulation should be instantly ...
4. ... shall assist the athlete obtainobtains viewing moment in this acute environment, .....

Keep witing
hirani03   
Aug 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / Writing Task 1: Explaining two tables about the reasons to travel abroad and the destinations [4]

There are two tables that show some information. The first table is about the reasons of people going abroad. The second table gives data about the target county of tourist visited. Both of tables give data since 1994 until 1998.

There are four reasons of visitors go out of the country. There are for holiday, for business, for meeting their relatives and friends, and other reasons. The commonest reason for foreign tourists to go abroad is holiday. Lot of people went to holiday in 1998. It was around 20000 people. The fewest is in the 1995. It was not more than 15000 people. Other reasons are the lowest motive to come overseas.

The targets to break on abroad were divided into three destinations. They are Western Europe, North America and other countries. The highest visitor came to Western Europe, while North America got the lowest guest in 1998. In 1995, the tourists attended less than a thousand in North America.




hirani03   
Aug 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / I accept as true that studying history and literature are needed by students [5]

Hai halim...
I have read your essay. These are some corrections from me.

1. However, others reasonother reasons that science and mathematics ...
Even though these are ideas could be accepted to some contextcontexts , here I will be give summary to contribute both of them.

2. For instance, they need for knowingto know World War I, World War II, and ...
When they could identify of them, it makes the huge ...
... they recognize many cases such as politicalpolitics , economics, world history, ...

3. From the other sidesides , I think that for learning science ...

... individual must pick up about of themtheir subject lesson in the school.
hirani03   
Aug 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / [Task 2] What makes a good teacher? Training or personal qualities? [4]

Hello yon959..
Here are some feedback that I can give you after reading your essay.

1. For instance, one of my secondary teachers is my life-long guiding person who does notdid not only teach me the knowledge but guides guided me to differentiate the rightthing and wrong thing . PassionatedPassionate teachers can impress students with their ...

2. Personal qualities of teacher do not only shapeconstruct the teachers themselves but also our students.

Keep writing and sharing.
hirani03   
Aug 14, 2016
Writing Feedback / Continuing Study to University Contrasted to Working or Traveling [2]

This is a writing based on the question below, in IELTS reading Test.

In some countries young people are encourage to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Continuation of Study



Nowadays, after graduating senior high school, the student has so many choices to do. They may continue to the university, or just take a break. In some countries, young people persuade to take a trip or to take an occupation. In my opinion, there are two benefits and two drawbacks.

The first point for the benefit of taking job or traveling is the gapper can find their passion. To perform working or journey, childhood will meet new people. They can learn many things from them. Youth can attain experience and new knowledge there. Finding this passion is able to occur when they try to explore other things that they never did before. It can be obtained from working, even only a year. Young teenagers also have much free time. This is the best way to take a trip. By journey they will meet so many people in different background. They are capable of getting new inspiration there. The second point is having a fresh mind. After exploring many places and working for a year, they already have experience. It is means the adolescence have an open mind. It helps them to decide what major they need to take, where they should study in university. They already have their target. The young generation can also get more information from their friends who previously in the university.

The drawbacks cover two things. The first drawback is the young people automatically must review their learning material when they were in the school. This is because the youthful require memorizing again their study to pass the examination of the campus where they want to join. Young generation must learn more and more to catch the target. The second disadvantage is late in graduating. The gapper will be slower in getting their degree compared with their friend in senior high school. It is because they are late in joining the universities as students compare with their friends which are continue to the university without break.

To conclude, I believe that the benefits of postponing study in university are better. Finding passions during journey and working will lead the adolescence to attain the targets at the time of studying in university. Passion will show the way they can choose in the future. Passion will inspire them to do some interesting things to innovate.

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