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I am applying for a Medical Summer Program at GTU, and some Criticism would be really helpful!



Danimal15 1 / -  
Dec 31, 2015   #1
I have to submit this in like a week and I feel like I wrote a very weak essay. Does it sound copied or like an Ad (Its's not, but that's what I've been told it sounds like)? Does it answer the prompt well? PLEASE HELP!!!

The prompt asked: In 300 words(approximately), write why do you want to attend a summer program at Georgetown?

Why I Want to Attend a Summer Program at Georgetown



I want to attend a Georgetown summer program because I want to get a head start on my future. At Georgetown, I will be able to get out of my comfort zone and try new things. I will be able to investigate the basics of medicine and have a look into the life of a medical professional.

I admire that the Georgetown summer programs gives you an intensive learning experience that is much more interesting, rigorous, and engaging than the average school curriculum. At the Georgetown Medical Institute, I have the opportunity to work with realistic labs and simulations. Also, the faculty and speakers are renowned experts in their fields who bring a lifetime of experiences and knowledge. At Georgetown's summer programs, you are allowed to be independent, and the work is less commanding, which in a way, makes it self motivating; you aren't working towards a grade, you are working for yourself.

In addition, I like that you get to share perspectives and opinions through lectures and discussions, which introduces ideas that you study in depth and apply to in the labs and simulations. There is an international and diverse community of kids at Georgetown's summer programs, which allows the exchanging of different perspectives and ideas. It also will help us learn to communicate with people of backgrounds and cultural differences.

I have always been interested in Georgetown University because of their Medical School. I want to explore, experience, and discover the Georgetown University college life, and this summer program will help me accomplish just that.

At Georgetown, I will have a lot of time and the opportunity to explore, grow, expand and decide on my interests and what I want to pursue in medicine. I will be able to challenge myself and build leadership and teamworking skills. I know I want to be a doctor in the future, and I know that the Georgetown Medical Institute will help me get there.

Ssakshijain 28 / 129  
Dec 31, 2015   #2
Hi Dany

If you are sure, you haven't copied from anywhere, then there is no need to worry. Universities know which essay is plagiarized and which is not, through numerous software. You have written a good essay, minor change from my side. Happy new year and good luck for your future:)

At Georgetown, I will be able to get out of my comfort zone and try new things. Do not say things, be more specific: new ideas/innovations/experiences
justivy03 - / 2265  
Jan 17, 2016   #3
- Also,( avoid using "Also" as this depicts a minor or lesser importance in the sentence ) T he faculty and
- At Georgetown'sThe ( at this point, it's fine to replace the subject with "The") summer programs,

- In addition, I like that you getit's good to share perspectives
- which allows the exchangingexchange of different
- It also will help us learn

- At Georgetown, I will allow me to have a lot of time and
- and I know that the Georgetown Medical Institute will helpbridge the gap tome get me there.

There you have it Tom, I hope this enhancement is not too late for your essay and I hope it helped.
Do let us know should you need further assistance and let us know what happened, we'd love
to hear from you. Remember, focus on your goals and work hard to get there.


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