Arts management field, Letter of recommendation; Master Program. Light, sound control, house manager

Dear all, I need your suggestions to make the letter of recommendation better in grammar, and this letter will be signed by my employer. Thanks for your kindness, I am grateful for this website.

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I would like to recommend Mr. _____ for admission to your university. I have known ______ personally for more than 3 years, and since June 2011 he has been employed as an assistant at the ____ Auditorium of Arts Center, _______ University.

Serving at the ______ Auditorium, he was responsible for the light control and sound control in the control room, and he also played a role as house manager, according to the cases to shift the ordering tasks. Arts Center provided many different fields of missions, including speeches, film screenings, band lives, dramas, dances and concerts. He was very familiar with the requirements about these forms of activities.

______ could manage each condition very well during the time he worked for the auditorium. He had proved to have the abilities of organization and keeping a good communication between staff and performers. The service provided by him for the both audiences and performers was unparalleled, with keen and modest, he held his work to a high achievement.

Mr. ______ is an outstanding individual with strong motivation. With the passion toward performance arts, he attended many workshops held by our organization. I still remembered his prominent appearance of Beijing Opera show, from an apprentice to a man standing on the stage, over one semester's training. ______ showed the firm enthusiasm for learning the unfamiliar by enlisting these multifaceted fields of art activities.

His ambition for what he can engage in is what makes him such an exceptional student. He caught all the opportunities around him to pursue his goal, exerting the talents of administration and communication in arts field. I support his application for admission without reservation, and would appreciate any assistance you can offer him.

Best regards,

Hi Chi-wei.I think you have a good start here, but there are definitely a lot of awkwardly written phrases in here. Also, I think it might be helpful to focus more on what makes you a good candidate for the school/ program. You discuss your work in detail, but you should also discuss why you/ your employer thinks that you'll succeed in this program. Maybe talking to your employer about what he or she thinks might be helpful. Also, I would recommend changing your opening greeting. And example is: To the XXX School of Arts Management Application Committee:


This is awkwardly written and and a run on sentence. It should be rephrased to make your duties more clear. Try breaking it down a bit more into two or more sentences. This also allows you to add more detail as well. Maybe something like: I also don't know what "according to the cases to shift when ordering tasks means." Do mean the ability to prioritize tasks as needed depending on the event?

he was responsible for controlling light and sound from the control room. He also worked as a house manager where he was able to prioritize responsibilities and tasks for each individual event.


"fields of missions" is also awkwardly written and confusing. Also, unless the name of the auditorium is arts center, that doesn't need capitalization. The arts center provides a venue for a variety of performances, including speeches, film screenings, live bands, dramas, dances, and concerts. He was very familiar with the requirements and responsibilities for each performance.


The word condition here is awkward. Simply saying performance or event would make it more clear. You also don't have to say "during the time he worked at the auditorium" as it's implied. Also, when you discuss organization and communication, your words are a little verbose and could be cleaned up a bit.

managed each event very well. He proved to have excellent organizational and communication skills, always keeping both staff and performers connected and up to date. You could say something else at the end there, but I think detailing your skills a little more would be beneficial. How did you communicate with staff and performers? Include that!


another confusing run on sentence here. With keen and modest what? You're missing a word there I think. It might be best to again break this down into at least 2 sentences. The services proved by him were unparalleled, both for the audiences and performers. With keenness and modesty, he held his work to the highest standards.


performing arts


I'm not quite sure what you're saying here. It seems like you're saying that in this appearance in the opera, you performed as someone who started as an apprentice and became a man standing on the stage. It doesn't sound like you are the one who started out as an apprentice and then stood on the stage. So I would definitely clarify that. Also "man standing on a stage" is really vague. I mean, a janitor mopping the floor gets to stand on the stage. Were you in the show? Or was it the prominent appearance of the show that is notable? So I would say what you were doing there if you were a performer. . Acting, singing, etc? "From apprentice to operatic performer" is much better to me and more specific as well.

____ may have started out as an apprentice, but with his training and hard work, over one semester, he became an operatic performer.


His ambition and dedication to engaging in a wide variety of opportunities in this field is what makes him such an exceptional student. He has taken all of the opportunities we have offered and used them, as well as his excellent communication and administrative skills, to grow in this field and achieve his goals.

For my supreme appreciation, I really learned a lot from your earnest help, I would rewrite it as soon as possible, I hope you could give me the suggestions of the new edition. : )