Unanswered [2]
  

Home / Letters   % width   Posts: 2


Motivational Letter to Study in Germany - Master in Computational Mechanics



RafaelRGindro 1 / -  
Feb 11, 2020   #1
Hello team of essay forum,

I am applying to a admission in a master's program in Germany in Computational Mechanics and I would be glad if you could give a opinion if it have enough content or if I have to describe more details of some paragraph. If have some grammar mistakes I am happy to know too.

Letter of Motivation



I, XXX XXX XXX, bachelor in Mechanical Engineering, hereby express my interest in joining the COMMAS Master's Program.

I became interested in the development of computer models subject due to its ability to assess physical behavior in the engineering's study and I believe this area would be a great opportunity to develop my career due to its potential to make a significant impact in future studies. As a result of my interest and affinity to the subject, I seek my specialization in the area of computer modeling and I acknowledge that your institution is the best option to provide the means to proceed with this career.

I have always been a determined person and I am in constant search for new challenges, both professionally and academically. I was able to develop my competences by carrying out various academic and professional activities involving research, teamwork and the development of complex projects.

Academically, I was able to develop my research skills by conducting a scientific research in Correlation Between Fatigue Stresses of Bodies with Polished Surfaces and Bodies with Roughness, in which I was able to incorporate statistical models and analytical developments in the area. Furthermore, during my bachelor studies I was part of academic extracurricular teams such as Aerodesign and Baja SAE. At Baja SAE I contributed to the structure and manufacturing team, carrying out the entire study of the vehicle chassis geometry by analyzing the deformations and efforts with numerical modeling tools through the ANSYS software.

For my Undergraduate degree thesis, I studied the application of an Electrostatic Precipitator for the post-treatment emission of a diesel engine for the collection of particle matter. The use of the ANSYS software has contributed to the analysis as it enabled to study the best filter geometry for the distribution of exhaust gases at high temperature. By making theses analysis, I could improve my knowledge in CFD, inspiring me to pursue a master's degree in the area.

Professionally I gained experience in the area during my internship and performance as a Design Engineer, where I was able to apply my knowledge of FEM and CAE in several projects to develop and validate steel and aluminum structures and trusses for high load conveyors using the MatLab software.

I will push the boundaries of technology with pioneering developments of complex engineering solutions by exploring all possibilities. For this reason, I chose to study in Germany, because, besides being a worldwide country recognized for its technological and industrial development, I admire it for being a country with a rich culture and a recognized organization in several areas. Large companies in the automobile industry were founded in the country, in which I would be glad to have the opportunity to intern and work as a regular employee in a close future, such as Daimler, Porsche or Bosch. Through my studies in the master's program, I will have the most adequate competences to enable me to develop professionally in the projects area with a great level of specialization as well as acting in the simulation area in Germany in the next years.

The University of Stuttgart, besides being located in one of the largest industrial centers in Germany, is an institution with great renown in the Engineering and Science sectors that prepare its students through an outstanding academic level, in addition to providing a practical approach. COMMAS caught my attention due to the great flexibility in the course's curriculum that would allow me to become a specialist in simulations in which I can enhance my projects and develop the most appropriate capabilities.

I consider that I have full competence and capacity to stand out in the master's program, and I would be very pleased to have the opportunity to participate in the program and that COMMAS and the University of Stuttgart will be my best opportunities to have diverse academic and professional experiences for my professional development.

Best Regards,

xxxxxx xxxxx xxxxx

Thanks for your attention!

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15461  
Feb 11, 2020   #2
Pull back on the undergraduate references. Highlight your research ability and thesis, but connect it to a more definitive motivation on your part. Speak heavily about how the masters program would contribute to enhancing the current workplace skills that you have. Equate your motivation clearly with your current work opportunities and desire for advance skills build-up on your part. The essay is severely lacking in a clear motivation or motivational points.

The motivational letter must be clear about how you plan to use this training in the future based on your current professional background. A masters student always has a professional motivation / reason for higher studies. I don't really get a sense of professional application in your current motivation explanation. This version fell into the trap of becoming an academic biography for you, which are not really useful information in a motivation letter. Those information belong either in a personal statement or a statement of purpose. I base this statement on commonly known criteria for each type of essay, without knowing if you are responding to specific prompt requirements for the application.

With regards to why you chose Germany, relate the response more to the University and its internship programs. That makes more sense than saying you want to study in Germany because of the chance to train at those automotive companies. The country does not give you the training, it is the university that does that. Therefore, the reason to study in Germany should rely heavily on the capacity of the university to train you based on your professional development needs or requirements.


Home / Letters / Motivational Letter to Study in Germany - Master in Computational Mechanics
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳