Commonwealth Masters Scholarship Pharmacology and Drug Discovery MSc

Please help me review my development impact statement 1
Provide a Development Impact statement in 4 parts explaining:

1.How your proposed study relates to:

a)Development issues at the global, national and local level?

b)Development issues connected to your chosen CSC theme and the wider sector? Strengthening health capacity

Development Impact part 1 *

Antibiotic resistance (ABR) is one of the top global threats in the 21st century, according to the WHO. It occurs when bacteria no longer respond to antibiotics, rendering the medications useless against them.
Without effective antibiotics, even a minor wound could lead to death. In 2019, nearly 5 million people lost their lives across the globe to conditions complicated by ABR, 90 percent of these deaths arose from developing countries like Nigeria, necessitating improved public health policies and strengthened drug R&D capacities. Other consequences of ABR include increased hospital stays and expenditure from receiving aggressive treatments.
90% of Nigerians pay for treatments out-of-pocket. To afford extra hospital stays, limited family funds are diverted away from meeting other crucial needs, including education, thus keeping these families and their communities poor.
Nationally, ABR contributes significantly to Nigeria's high infectious disease mortality rate (IHME, 2023), further weakening the already overburdened economy .
Globally, ABR can worsen the impact of viral pandemics by making secondary bacterial infections that accompany viral illnesses hard to treat (PACCARB, 2023).
Therefore, my master's will enable me to contribute to developing novel antibiotic class to combat ABR and ensuring equitable access for a stronger Nigerian health system and emergency response.

These are mere discussion points. Bullet points if you will. The product of your brainstorming, nothing more. It does not properly respond to the writing guide information as required. Presentation-wise, these are just anchor sentences for the paragraphs. What it these are lacking are proper expanded discussion presentations. It is obvious that the writer is using researched information, without fully understanding the background of the researched data. You have to go beyond this data to show a full understanding of how Antibiotic Resistance affects the 3 areas of study as indicated in the prompts. There is a lack of development in the presentation so you cannot use these as actual responses unless you fully develop the ideas you have presented.

Thank you so much for taking your time to review my essay.