The courses that I choose relate to my previous academic or experience and plan for future

These three university courses are relevant to my graduated subject and currently I am working at Forestry Administration, Ministry of Agriculture, Forestry and Fisheries. I used to study at university that there are some subjects are involved with environment and climate change then I was a assistance in restoring forest project to reduce harmful from any hazard caused by environmental pollution or climate change but it is not enough to me to understand clearly about this issue. I have read Reed program in Cambodia focusing on keeping forests for selling to developed countries. In my view, Cambodia still needs more specialize in this climate change as understand clearly about forest to process this program. The climate and environment are closely connected to forests. So, in Cambodia, forests are extremely vital for indigenous people to support their livelihood, it also helps environment to reduce Carbon Dioxide (CO2) and purify the air. I also have more experiences in sharing information of climate change via television and other public speaking. For my future plan to study in UK, I want to have a specific skill in climate change or environmental management then this is a factor to improve my qualification in work. Furthermore, I can learn more experience from lecturers and classmates in this country with the courses then I will have more networks to share experience or information to my university courses or I can get some idea relates to my courses. If I have chance, I will continue doctoral degree in this country to strengthening my knowledge after I help my Cambodian people and the globe especially vulnerable person.

ok, after reading your passage, i know what you want. i guess on your passage is more tell about your self. here you like sharing your wish.

then, let me try to give some recommendations on your writing, just minor flaws.
I used to study at university that there are some subjects are involved with environment and climate change then I wasa assistance in restoring ...

i recommend you to use 1 tense in 1 sentence, it is better than mixing.
I used to study at university that there were some subjects are involved with environmental and climate change, then I was an assistance in restoring ...

Cambodia still needs more specialize in this climate change
in this case, you need to put adjective than verb
Cambodia still needs more specialized in this climate change

I also have more experiences in sharing information of on climate ...
please use suitable preposition

I can learn more experience from lecturers ...
I will have more networks to share experience or ...
i guess you have a lot of experiences which want you to share. attention on singular or plural
I can learn more experiences from lecturers ...
I will have more networks to share experiences or...

Thanks, hope it can helps.

Yun, your statement exists as somewhere in between a personal statement and a statement of purpose. Which is it? Can you please give us the prompt that you are trying to respond to so that we can better analyze your statements and offer you more relevant advice? At the moment, it is hard to decipher which direction this essay should be headed in, which parts can be omitted, and how we can help you edit it.

Please note that writing an essay in this format, without paragraph separations for the different topic sentences, makes it highly difficult to read and results in reader fatigue. The closeness of the words and the constantly connected sentences make it difficult for the reviewers brain to keep track of what it is reading. It also does not offer the reviewer a chance to receive the impact (if any) of the statement that you wrote. There is a definite lack of paragraph development because you did not bother to separate the topics into separate discussions via paragraph formatting. All I can read are overviews of your responses. Summary answers that do not really connect you to the response. It is almost like you just wanted to get over with responding to the essay requirements. That is never a good sign for your essay. It does not help your application in the least bit.

Basically, I view this as a weak essay, not because of the grammar problems, but because of the formatting issues. It also lacks a clear prompt topic to respond to. There is still a long way to go before this essay is even ready to be considered a draft. I hope that you can still work on the content with us. I look forward to reading the prompt for your essay. Thanks :-)