Joint Japan World Bank Graduate Scholarship Program

Dear all, please I need your assistance on this essay

TeensGrowForest team leader

Describe your most significant professional achievement and your reasons for viewing it as such

The aged farmers are our current food champions in Nigeria. The poor societal perception about agriculture has discouraged many youths from getting involved thereby making the future of our food system insecure. TeensGrowForest project was initiated with objectives of changing the wrong perception about agriculture, expose young people to career opportunities in the value chains and train young people on sustainable agriculture to cushion the effect of climate change. In my professional capacity and my antecedence of value driven and result oriented, I was appointed as the team lead to achieve the set objectives in one of the urban high schools with student population of 1300.

I deployed my project planning expertise to developed sequence of activities, skills required, time frame, team selection and costing for the project. Milestones were set along each activity for proper monitoring and evaluation of the project. In the execution, 300 students were given orientation on career opportunities in agriculture and the risky future of food without young people involvement. 95 students showed interest to take career in agriculture. The 95 students were formed into farmer's club for ease of mentoring. A 3-hectare school farm was implemented in the school for the first time since its existence to serves as training station for practical agriculture and value chains development for the agricultural students in the school.

Before now, the school kitchen that feed the over 1000 students sourced 100% of the raw food from the local markets. The kitchen has now depended on the school farm to meet up at least 10% of its need. A plus to the initial objectives. To avoid postharvest loss, the JETS club in collaboration with the Framers Club in the school came up with development of Evaporative cooling device to extend the shelf life of the vegetables from the farm. Another exceptional achievement of the project

Your presentation is not very focused. You are not really justifying the reasons why you believe that this activity is a great achievement. I think it will be better if you write a totally new essay that would instead, focus on the following topics per paragraph:

- Introduce TeensforGrowth to the reader. What is the organization about? What personal interests enticed you to join the program? Summarize your leadership accomplishments that led to your becoming a team leader.

- Explain what the name of the project you were assigned was. What was the objective of the project? What did it hope to accomplish?
- Summarize how you implemented the project.
- Summarize how your project was received by your peers. Any other notable people such as relevant organizations, local government, or the news media can be used as reference notable and impressive reference point for the successful implementation of the project.

- Close the essay with a reference to the personal satisfaction that you felt. What is it about this project that stood out the most for you, which led you to citing it as your most significant professional achievement?

I have a problem with the overall essay though. It does not appear like this is a professional project but rather one that is related to an extra-curricular activity. There is no relevant office and appointed position set for you in the organization. Are you sure this is a salaried job? A salaried job means that this is your profession, something that you pursue to fulfill the training you received in college. You cannot use an extra curricular or college organization related activity for this essay. You have to somehow clarify that this project was done in a professional, not volunteer, internship, or extra-curricular capacity for it to qualify as a response to the prompt.