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giggino21 1 / 1  
Feb 22, 2019   #1


I'm applying for the Korean Government Scholarship Program under the embassy track. I'm looking for any feedback on how to make my personal statement more compelling and English corrections. Thank you so much in advance!

set of instructions provided for the personal statement
1. Motivations with which you apply for the program
2. your education and work experience in relation to the KGSP
3. Reason for Studying in Korea.
4. any other aspects of your background and interests which may help us evaluate your aptitude and passion for graduate study or research

In line with the globalization of the last century, I believe that the contemporary visual and performing arts is rapidly becoming a creative industry, a growth engine for the future, with increasing educational levels, income and leisure time. Culture and arts managers, and culture and arts planners are emerging as promising jobs and recognized in these environments. In this way, when I asked to my university teachers which was the best countries to study a master that includes not only my strong interest in arts and performing arts but also in management, technology and communication, the top answer was: South Korea. This is only one of the multiple reasons why I'm applying for this program. The raising of visual and performance arts, the entertainment industry and the high-technologic communication develop during the last decade in South Korea has made this country unique and interest for my researches and my future work.

From my bachelor's degree in Padua, I started to be interested about the relation between visual/performing arts and technology considering what was happening in South Korea. During the master's degree in "Visual art and fashion" in Venice, my research conducts me also to learn about the sophisticated entertainment economic model of South Korea. This model impresses and excites me for the usage of performing art, communication and the accurate aesthetic research that makes the Korean entertainment unique and famous in all over the world with the booming of "K-pop" and "K-drama". In this point of view, I studied and analyzed the different models of Korean tv programs and broadcasting channels (KBS) or the largest Korean entertainment companies (JYP Entertainment-YG Entertainment). This last research took part on my master's degree thesis in my last university where I graduated with first class honors. Finished my master's degree, I won a trainee scholarship at the no-profit visual and performing arts association of "Peninsula" based in Berlin. During the internship, I improved successfully my skills managing the social media and organizing the events promoted by the association. Moreover, I developed my English skills working in an international environment. In this period, I also became familiar with the "Koreanisches Kulturzentrum" in Berlin. Participating at the event organized by the Korean cultural center in Berlin, I had the chance to get closer with Korean performing arts, entertainment and culture. Especially, this experience made me many Korean friends who permitted me to enjoy and get more addicted to the Korean lifestyle, mindset and cuisine taking also Korean language lessons.

I considered necessary to continue with my studies and do a master's degree in Korea for increase my level of knowledge and opportunity to work in the art and entertainment business, especially in South Korea. I see KGSP as an opportunity for me to excel and develop my skills in a country where the universities offer master's degree that are jointly managed by the college of Fine Arts, college of Business, collage of Public Administration and College of Law. Only a few countries in the world offer a unique approach to education as this program does. The high level of education that Korea has, which is recognized throughout the world, placing itself in the first places with one of the best educations in the world, is what made me choose KGSP over other countries, but also seeks to encourage at the same time international exchange, as well as promoting friendship between different countries like Italy and Europe in my case. In this way, I consider the master's program on art and performing art management in Korea the best well developed and an occasion to fill the Italian educational gaps on business and communication.

Having these interests and goals deeply motivated me to apply for Global Korea Scholarship and I hope to be able to grab this once in a lifetime opportunity to reach my future goals. I want to put my skills and my passions in a world where is expected that the completion of many related organizations, arts practitioners and professionals in the field of performing arts will increase explosively.

Bagoesinderaja - / 6 1  
Feb 23, 2019   #2
Hi, I noticed some grammar mistake, particularly in some preposition. It should be non-profit, not no-profit. I think your motivation is somewhat weak. Try to add some example of some success in the raising of visual and performance arts. That might strengthen your motivation. Overall, you have answered the question prompt but you just need to fix the grammar and add some transition and develop your writing.

Good Luck
OP giggino21 1 / 1  
Feb 24, 2019   #3
Thank you so much!